Whatsapp group chats: people who say how busy they are EVERY TIME

[Chickapee]

Is it just me? I'm in a few whatsapp groups and I can think of a person who does this every few days but she's not the only one who does it a lot. She comes on and says "Sorry I haven't caught up as I'm so busy with work / kids / life but I hope you're all okay" and that's fine but does this every few days. I'd feel silly saying the same thing all the time: I'd you are away for a few days so what? You're not the only person who is busy. Sometimes she's hasn't even missed anything!

AIBU to think this is just attention-seeking behaviour?

I think you’re overthinking this.
I often find that if I apologise for being late to reply because I was busy I will 100% get the reply that they too have been extremely busy. I find it laughable that it’s so important to be busy these days and I don’t know why it’s so triggering to many to think that someone might be busier than they are…

anyway. WhatsApp groups are hell and best stayed away from imho

Maybe because she doesn't want to read 4 groups' worth of peoples crap so just pretends she's read it and comes up with an excuse not to have replied?

I hate the ones who ask a question that they would see has been answered just a few messages earlier if they could only BE ARSED TO MOVE THEIR THUMB THE 2CM IT TAKES TO SCROLL BACK UP.

Well yeah maybe she can't be bothered. Whatever the reason why make the point every time about about busy you are. Most of us are busy. These are groups of women with a
young children. We all work. She comes on and puts on a detailed update of what she has going.

It is not a bit deal by the way. This is intended to be lighthearted and I wonder whether there is one of these in most groups!

I agree WA groups are hell. Whatever you say someone gets triggered.

ahh, the cult of competitive busyness!
Some people get a sense of validation from emphasising how hotly in demand their time is...

I think she's assuming there is some kind of etiquette to read every single post in the group whereas I think that's a misconception, if people have been blathering on then you can just skip to the end no problem.

But she's trying to be polite by expressing that she hasn't read the intervening posts and excusing herself for that.

I doubt it's a self importance thing. Most people aren't thinking about themselves that much. It's much more likely to be a trying not to be rude thing. People tend to spend a lot more time worrying about whether they have been rude than they do trying to make themselves look better.

ahh, the cult of competitive busyness!
Some people get a sense of validation from emphasising how hotly in demand their time is...

Yes this is not just on WhatsApp!

But she's trying to be polite by expressing that she hasn't read the intervening posts and excusing herself for that.

I don't think it's just this because people reply and say "Wow you're so busy. How do you do it all etc." and this repeats every few days. I find it a bit silly.

If I miss a conversation then I miss it. Most are the same. No one else constantly apologises for how "busy" they are!

any

I think it's a bit self absorbed to assume you are more busy than everyone else personally.

The only reason why I would apologise in a group and say I had been busy is if I genuinely thought I had neglected something. So in a work or collaboration group or when there are tasks to be done in the group. But I would read the previous posts and reply to the questions/ tasks

Otherwise, I just ignore the endless chit chat.

Nice to catch up with all of you. Sorry for late reply. I have been terribly busy this Bank Holiday weekend! Organising a sit down in the garden under the sun and stuffing my face! Ice cream included

I have been guilty of doing this before but I don't think it's usually competitive business- I just think it's much easier to say 'sorry I've been snowed under' than say the real reason you can't/don't want to keep up with a group chat.

In my case it was because I was having health problems and felt like I needed to explain my silence but didn't really want to talk about my illness to everyone at that point. But it could be that she doesn't particularly like group chats or finds them overwhelming and doesn't want to look rude. Or just kept meaning to reply and forgetting and doesn't want to look rude.

@DameEdna1 Do you do that every few days or once in a while? We all do it sometimes but sometimes no one has said anything for a few days and she still comes on apologising for being MIA and lists all the things she's got going on!

I agree

I am on a few grps and sometimes there's zillions of messages, I just don't read them but not do I tell everyone I've been busy!

Most likely to be a self absorbed person who asks little about other people, but makes out that they lead a popular and hectic life 🙄

I often find that those who are constantly trying to remind you of how busy they are, are not really that busy.

Its ok to have down time.

my pet peeve is the constant battle with some people in groups for " who is the busiest" I just don't bother anymore. I reply when i can and if i miss anything, ill scroll back through and answer if I can

Some people do get a kick out of been busy and having the monopoly on it which is fine. Its like saying you are tired..... someone else will always be worse off !!!

One of my friends drives me bonkers with this - her Whatsapp status is permanently set to "busy", and every time I ask how she is, I get "good thanks, work's crazy and we're just so busy at the moment". In her household are two adults who work, and one neurotypical secondary aged child. But she's apparently far, far busier than everyone else, including me who's a disabled single parent of two disabled children 🙄

Some people are so busy being busy they don't seem to get anything done at all.
😂

Realistically though not everyone is busy; some people have nothing going on or are TV addicts or something so have nothing to say. Some people are indisputably busy.