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Original poster

To tell nosy CFs to stop peeking over the fence!

58 replies

WhatToDoAboutTheNosys · 26/05/2023 20:09

So we live in a small cul-de-sac and have a good neighbourhood situation.

But one of the families are such nosy CFs! They've said they like where their house is so they can see everything going on, and they barely try to hide their peeking.

Our gardens are next to each other, The fence is high but if they go right up to it or to the back of their garden then can "sneak" a look into ours.

Usually we just laugh or shake our heads at their nosyness but I'm starting to think do we need a word? We don't have anything to hide but it's not on us it! And how to say it?!

Recently we had work done in the garden and one of the other houses saw Mr Nosy on tip toes on his driveway trying to get a better look at what was going on.

This evening we've had people round in the garden and I saw him right up at the fence peeking over. This isn't unusual but just made me think ffs what does he get out of knowing who we have round.

What would you all do? It will awkward to say anything and undoubtedly he'll go in a huff with us too.

OP posts:
logoutsettings · 26/05/2023 21:49

yes

Thepossibility · 26/05/2023 21:52

Ask him loudly if he's a peeping tom or raise concerns to his wife when you next see her that you suspect Mr. Nosey might be one because peering over people's fences isn't normal behaviour for a grown man.
Creepy fucker.

AnObserverInThisDarkWorld · 26/05/2023 21:58

Start sunbathing topless so his wife will quickly stop him

Don't use a water pistol. Too direct.

Just start hosing the plants right next to the fence. With the jet on high. And oops its bouncing off the fence and up at Mr Nosey

WandaWonder · 26/05/2023 21:59

I would lay things out that look strange or odd if they are going to be nosy give them something to think about

SandraDeee · 26/05/2023 22:01

Leave a sprinkler set up near the fence ready to switch on when you notice him there. Just watering the garden, nothing to see here…

ThePoshUns · 26/05/2023 22:02

Just give him the bird

Shouldbehoovering · 26/05/2023 22:03

Post a copy of the mr men book ‘mr nosy’ through their door and leave some clothes pegs attached to to the top of your fence….

noodlezoodle · 26/05/2023 22:03
George Clooney Reaction GIF

I think you need to do this veeeerrrry slowly

loudandclearr · 26/05/2023 22:04

We have one of these, always chatting on the phone about my affair and Me and dh have really funny conversations about putting the house up for sale,how frisky t was in the bedroom earlier, how we live leaving scented candles on when we go out so it smells nice when we got home, how I've ordered a drumkit or am auditioning for a musical.

It's just a bit of fun and turns it from an annoying thing to a funny one. I can tell the neighbours are just bursting to talk about it when we chat in the street but makes it even funnier when they make passive aggressive remarks about previous neighbours who had the police called on them for drumming, how their friends house got burnt down because they left a candle on etc.

Treesoutsidemywindow · 26/05/2023 22:05

I agree with the hose pipe. Just buy or move a plant to the various places where he might be looking through/over, and then every time you see him having a nose, shout out to your DH 'just going to water the new plant' get the hose pipe and give him a good dowsing in the process. If you don't want to buy a plant you could just dig a few small holes, and pretend you're watering seeds. In the past I have unintentionally soaked a neighbour, who was in her garden while I was watering, so these things can happen. Also, if he claims you did it on purpose, you can then say 'yes, because I'm sick of you being so nosy!' Hopefully that will do the trick.

unicorncrumble · 26/05/2023 22:17

Eww, they sound creepy. Some of these suggestions are funny, but you live next to these people. I would just start by politely saying "can I help you?" And if they don't take the hint just be blunt and say "look, mr nosy, I often see you looking into our garden and it makes me feel really uncomfortable. Please stop". If they don't then the PPs all
Have great fake grave/water pistol type suggestions. One I'd add is to film them, silently (but don't hide it). Just don't say anything.

CannotThinkOfABloodyName · 26/05/2023 22:36

I’d just get some of that trellis that has flowers/foliage already on it. Nosy fucker.

Floralys2 · 26/05/2023 23:08

Bamboo

The answer is always bamboo

Original poster
WhatToDoAboutTheNosys · 27/05/2023 11:22

Thank you everyone, some very funny suggestions and stories 😄

With any luck us remarking on it yesterday may have been enough but I doubt it. We will implement a step by step approach with all of these suggestions!

OP posts:
twoshedsjackson · 27/05/2023 11:38

It depends on the neighbour, of course, but when I first moved into my house, the old lady next door was keen to act as a one-woman Neighbourhood Watch - genuine twitching of net curtains.
So I took to smiling, waving and calling a cheery greeting. She was horrified (I think she thought she could not be seen....) and it stopped.

35965a · 27/05/2023 11:44

Just call him out on it every time you see him do it. You can make it as polite or as blunt as you want - “You looking for something John” “can I help you” “why are you spying on us you fucking weirdo”

Mountainpika · 27/05/2023 11:52

Water pistol.
When he's looking over, shout to husband/wife, "That tom is there again. Damned creature! " and let fly with the water.

Showdogworkingdog · 27/05/2023 12:11

That would piss me off too. Do you think if you invite them around for a proper look, it might curtail their curiosity a bit? “I noticed you looking, would you like a proper look?” sort of approach?

Recently my neighbours had their garden landscaped. They didn’t say anything to warn us about the noise, or the vans parked over our drive for days on end while they worked (I would have, just a friendly word to make them aware and to ask them to let me know if it created any problems for them etc, but that’s me, Mrs Perfect). There’s now a trellis taller than our fence where I can see it from my kitchen window. It’s a different colour to the fence and looks a bit shit, but it’s not attached to the fence and so it’s none of my business, I’ve just changed the height of my kitchen window blind so the trellis is obscured because looking at the different colours of wood sets my teeth on edge.

Anyways, once the work was done the landscaping company posted photos and even a video of my neighbours garden on the local spotted page. Naturally I had a really good look (😏) and now I can see they’ve planted wisteria at the foot of the shitty trellis. I love wisteria so being able to see what they’ve done has reassured me really. It is much better to avoid being at loggerheads with your neighbours if you possibly can. But clearly, invading your privacy isn’t on either.

HappiestSleeping · 27/05/2023 12:14

sadsack78 · 26/05/2023 21:08

Mess with him.

Let him catch you digging a grave-sized hole. Cover it up in a hurry with a tarp when you catch him peeking. Have a lumpy, suspicious black binbag or suitcase positioned nearby.

This 👆

Definitely this.

Arewehumanorarewecupboards · 27/05/2023 12:20

Make a satanic symbol out of stones on your lawn.
or just a sign that says peeping toms will be prosecuted.

Irequireausername · 27/05/2023 12:24

Creepy weird saddo, what could you even be doing that he finds so interesting?

Why doesn't he focus on his own life?

WildFlowerBees · 27/05/2023 12:25

Build a stone circle and tell your dh that your ceremonial robes are arriving next week. Practice weird chants and ding bells. Say you can't wait to start your naked well man group and perhaps dh should invite 'Tom' next door to join.

Atishoos · 27/05/2023 12:42

He is so weird. Might be ill with the D word or something as it is not really normal and he obviously has no worries about doing it. I would really hate to be constantly spied on like that. I'm sitting here thinking "what would I do" and I think I would have a perch ready and easily moveable so I would jump on said perch anytime I caught Mr. Peeky having a look. Face to face at the top of the fence and just tell him to stop and that I have no idea why he does it, and don't understand why he is spying on me so blatantly. Bang out of order.

Failing that, I would install a temporary screen of false ivy that you can buy in rolls for the top of the fence. Or a sprinkler as others have said. OMG it is just so odd that anyone would have the cheek to do this.

HerbsandSpices · 27/05/2023 13:02

I'd just ignore it. If I go to the top of my section I can see into the neighbour's garden in spite of the high fence. It's just the angle. I don't often go up there but it's not like I look on purpose. I can't help but see. The reverse must be true too.

I know they're building a new garden at the moment. I can see them up the top of their section from my kitchen. Not nosy but can't help but notice. If I have ever deliberately glanced, it's because I'm wondering what the noise is about, and it's just a passing glance. No need to stand on tip toes or look over the fence. I assume they do the same.

If it's frequent, probably just acknowledging them so they know you are aware they are peeking is enough.

BreatheAndFocus · 27/05/2023 13:10

Some trellis with those fake trailing plants on it. Then if he tries to get up close to peer through any small holes, put the hosepipe on him to ‘water the new plant’.

Some people are just bloody rude! We had one who used to look through the tall shrubs bordering our garden and watch us eating breakfast in our own kitchen! They have no shame. We only dealt with him by putting a solid, tall fence up to stop him. He lost interest then.