Silent treatment - Do I deserve it?

[Justwanttobehappyplease]

Have posted before under another name about this but am having a tough day.

Getting divorced (after I couldn’t cope with the blame/stonewalling/moodiness anymore). Still in the same house while finances are sorted (waiting for date for final hearing). Hopefully not too long to go now.

He has ignored me completely for the last year - won’t talk to me, look at me, acknowledge I exist - even in front of the DC (7 and 5). He will respond to emails or texts, but sometimes takes a long time.

Is this the silent treatment? Or is he doing no contact? (He often said I was a bully/abuser but my therapist/women’s aid don’t think I was)

It is driving me mad. I feel awful, especially for the children. I’m so full of self doubt and I just have no idea how it ended up like this.

Just looking for any advice. Is this normal? Do I deserve this?

AIBU to not be coping with this? Or have I brought it on myself?

They are 7 and 5 (6 and 4 when this started). They know he doesn’t talk to me and doesn’t love me. He has told them I am a bully. I have tried hard not to bad mouth him. I’ve just said that sometimes people find it hard to talk and I would like him to talk to me, but I’m ok. The kids just seem to accept this is how it is now. I feel awful for them, but for now they seem ok. They love spending time with their dad (who did very little with them before the separation…) I find it all really hard but am trying to do right by them as best I can.