Hey :) Ive been with my partner for almost 4 years we have lived together for over 3 years.I have 2 children , he has a 19 year old daughter with someone else.
Hes not an affectionate person, he is can be secretive for silly reasons. I complain about a general lack of effort on his part it took him ages to involve himself with my kids and it still doesnt feel like a proper close family.He will help when i ask with anything but he wont volunteerily offer help often.
I feel he likes to keep him and his daughters relationship seperate to us and in the past we have been excluded (daughter and his mother made up lies and she said id been not nice with her) He knew it wasnt true this went on for almost a year but he never once pulled them up on it he let it happen.
He had to take his daughter out as she wouldnt come the house and he still now goes to his mothers without us. I finally held out the olive branch myself and its sorted with his Daughter (i think she felt stupid as it was all lies) But i found out id been blamed for him no longer really "talking " much with his daughters Mum. I found out he had phonecalls with his daughters Mum regarding what id been accused of and still never said its not true.
We often have to hang around at weekends waiting for her to say if she is coming to ours or not sometimes we wait all day. If we end up going out my bf looks mithered all the time incase she decides to ring. A few times wev been out me my kids and him and hes upped and left because she has asked him to fetch her from work etc.
My problem is i dont feel like the relationship is moving forward it still feels so seperate! I feel like they get all their talking out the way before she gets here in the car and then theyr mostly silent unless i make convo even with each other its so awkward.I treated her like a queen in theboast but theirs no apprecoation from my bf for that so i have laid off a bit now.
I would have thought by now my kids and her would consider themselves to be siblings but its not like that :( she has offered to bbysit but he says why should she be the 1 to babysit(we never go out)
He is a very cold person if i cry he wont confort me. Now im evn more annoyed as hes been told a day before theuv gone on hol that he needs to feed his daughters pet, keys dropped off to me.
Am i being unreasonable.in thinking he shouldnt be feeding his exes pet, when theu were both single he did things with them all and had her other kids stay at his , and also helped her out and they got back together briefly. I know nothing is going on now but i just dont feel right