How did you stop feeling so sad that chronic illness has taken so much from you?

[Howtokeepbreathing]

I don't want to become bitter, as I get older. But at times I get desperately sad at just how much chronic illness has taken away from me. I first became ill with an autoimmune condition as a child, then later more joined the party in my twenties.

It has limited my career, my social life, my ability to travel and I probably will never have a child. This last is deeply painful in particular and only at the start of acceptance with it, I can't bear to say 'never' right now and still have hope, even though I know the reality.

Don't get me wrong I still do have a great life in many ways and have certainly had small tastes of success in career, etc. But too many hospital appointments and the relentless fatigue have an impact.

How do you frame things in your head in a way that helps you be at peace if you have a similar situation?

Framing things in your head is the key, and I'm in charge of that. You can take two people in the same situation, one will be perfectly happy, the other will be miserable. The only difference is their perspective, and that is one thing that is in my control.

There are some people with the most crushing circumstances who still connect with gratitude enough to be happy, and others with all the luck in the world who are miserable as sin because they can't see it.

I'm very grateful for my life and my medical treatments @GoldDuster

I am grateful every day when the realisation hits me about what the alternative would be. However I'm still overpoweringly sad at times alongside being grateful.

I think that's ok, it's ok to feel sad sometimes because things didn't work out like you wanted, as long as the sadness isn't the focus.

I was involved in an accident many years ago that really changed the trajectory of things for me, and continues to affect me on a daily basis in several fairly fundamental ways. Yes, things could be different, they could absolutley be better, but also a sight worse and that's where I consciously choose to put my focus. I'm no Mary Poppins and yes I have a shit day now and again, but so does everyone, no matter what their circumstances, it's part of being human and makes me appreciate the great days even more.

I have no words of wisdom for you OP but I really feel for you and understand what you’re saying. Sometimes we just need to be heard and grieve for the life we thought we would have.

I was diagnosed with a rare AI disease in
my late 40’s and it has been life changing, however, I did have my childhood and early adulthood all in good health and get to do all the those things that most of us just take for granted.

I often think about the people with my illness that have been affected so much younger than me and how unfair life can be at times.

I guess it’s just the old cliche of being grateful for what you do have… I take one day at a time and just try not to think about the future but be present in every day and try to find small joys..