How do you do you do it?

[Emeraldrings]

I have a toddler and when he is illi it causes a nightmare with childcare and work.
DH and I split childcare when DS is sick but I don't think he's done more than one full month at nursery this year. He's caught D&V twice so 48 hours off each time. Ear infections where nursery insist he stays home for 24 hours after starting antibiotics. Hand, foot and mouth, tonsillitis and high temperatures have also led to time off.
Unfortunately he generally shares his illness with me and DH so end up taking time off twice, although several times I've just dosed up on paracetamol and cracked on.
I work at the nursery DS attends and they have now said I can't have anymore time off for being sick and it was heavily implied that I can't have time off for DS. Obviously they can't enforce that but I have only been there 17 months so less than 2 years.
What do you do? There must be other people out there who don't have family nearby, how do you cope if your child is often ill? DH does a bit more than 50%of staying at home but he can't do it all or he'll end in trouble for time off.
It must be a common problem. How do others do it?

If getting hold of emergency babysitters is out of the question, I would have an honest chat with my boss to see what the options are. What do your colleagues do?

Working from home was my answer to this, which i know is not possible in your role. Sadly I feel like the working world does not cater at all for people with kids, it seems frowned upon for time off with a sick child.

I see both sides, as a parent what the hell can you do. As an employer you need someone reliable.

Of all the employers who you would think would get it, you'd think a nursery would. Given that your DH already does his fair share there's really not much else other than find (and probably pay) for emergency childcare or you and / DH go a bit part time if you can afford it. If you both did a 4 day week that's 2/5 covered (assuming DS cooperates and is sick on those days, but it ups the odds). Otherwise, thinking drastically, is moving nearer to family that would help an option? I relocated a significant distance for this reason. It's hard but it does tend to get easier as they get older.

I took time off from full time work until my children started school and got a job working evenings and weekends as dh was at home at those times to look after them.
It gets easier once they start school but you still have to work out what you're going to do with a child for 13 weeks of school hols or share the time off between you and DH so someone takes 6 weeks off and the other 7 weeks off over the course of the school year. Failing that a few of my friends got sorted with term time only jobs in schools.
Like you we don't have family near by either.

You wait for it to pass. The illlness years don't go on forever. It's hard though

If your job is in danger, then I think your dp will have to take more time off.

That said, they can't tell you that you can't have sick leave. They can only instigate their sickness management policy.

This is a total nightmare for everyone, you’re not alone. I quit and went freelance.

There is only about 4 members of staff with young children and two of them have family nearby. Even if I moved my parents are too old to help with childcare and MIL is disabled.
At the moment DH has agreed to take over any time off for DS but I think long term I might have to look for an evening/weekend job, which I did before and hated but needs must I suppose.
I already have Friday off, I have suggested to DH he goes to a 4 day week but he's not keen.

Honestly...I became a sahm because two parents working full-time with no family help is a logistical nightmare that I couldn't actually bear.