Size 16 but don't feel I look it

[mamapio]

I have put on weight the past few years so have completely avoided dating. However, I recently joined OLD and have a date tomorrow night.

Absolutely terrified what he will think of me. I've always had body dysmorphia, am never able to have a clear idea of how big/small I am or if I'm ugly or pretty. I just view myself as fat and ugly no matter what size I am or what I do to my face.

I am 5 foot 3 and about 14 stone (maybe a bit under) and size 16 bottom and size 14 top.

Can you advise if I look my weight/size or much bigger? Am I fat? Is this something I should warn my date about?

I'm genuinely thinking about pulling out but then don't want to be alone forever

You’re a classic apple with good legs. Enjoy the date!

OP presumably he's seen your OLD profile and likes what he sees

Please go and enjoy yourself, you look fab

I'm 5'2, 11 stone and wear size 12 normally. I'd say you look about the same as me if not smaller and I don't look my weight either, I'm guessing you have quite good muscle tone.
Enjoy your date!

If you're 5'3" , I can't imagine how you're anything approaching 14 stone. You look like you have a great figure to me.
If you're 5'3", from that photo, I'd guess you weighed about 10 stone max.

I'm 5'3" and a 14/16. I defo look bigger than you. You look great. Hope your date went well.

Clothes are sizes, not people. You look great.

That’s really cute

Explain why you think you should possibly warn your date? Would you expect to be warned if he was larger, smaller, shorter or balding? Surely that goes both ways.

You look a completely normal lovely attractive size

You do not look anything like a size 16.

speaking as a size 16 on online dating - I have rarely, if ever, had men seem to be put off by my size. Men are usually less critical of women's bodies than women are. Go in smiling and make him feel like he's lucky to be there with you.

ps - there will be something he will be paranoid about in his own looks/body.

pps - make sure you wear matching socks ;-)

Men honestly aren't as obsessed with weight as we are. Unless you're an absolute blimp (which you're not) he probs won't care. A lot of men are self conscious themselves of the fact they don't look like Aquaman. Worrying about shoulders not broad enough, especially in comparison to waist. Arms too spindly, chest not big enough, etc.

Lifes too short to worry about that stuff... just enjoy yourself and be safe!

Some men are very dangerous ...becareful online dating

You look lovely, gorgeous legs. Try to relax and enjoy the date

I think confidence gives the illusion of being half a stone lighter!

Hear me out....someone who is happy with themselves is comfortable, wears clothes that fit & flatter, walks tall, smiles etc. will always look lighter than someone who is badly dresses, slouching or clearly not happy with their weight.

There's nothing wrong with how you look - just enjoy yourself.

He's seen photos of you right? So he knows what he's getting. I bet he's punching, they usually are 😂.

I don ‘t think you are14st - unless you carry all the weight in your head. You look fab.

Your figure is nice. You have nice legs. I think you're worrying unnecessarily.

Yes she does. That's what size 16 looks like. Beautiful, isn't it?

'Cause I got that boom boom that all the boys chase
And all the right junk in all the right places
I see the magazines (ah-ha) workin' that Photoshop (ah-ha)
We know that shit ain't real
Come on now, make it stop
If you got beauty beauty (ah-ha), just raise 'em up
'Cause every inch of you is perfect
From the bottom to the top

If you're 5'3 and 14 stone then you're obviously overweight, there's no point denying that. But most people are these days so you don't look abnormal or anything. There's certainly nothing to warn your date about!!

Eh

She does look like a 16. It’s ok to be, and look like, a size 16. It’s not something that’s wrong or terrible.