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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not take in parcels for next door.

28 replies

Greenflamesburn · 17/05/2023 13:43

That's it basically.
AIBU to not take in parcels. The delivery man has just banged on my door, rang the door bell several times and used the knocker.
I'm in a teams meeting working from home today. I answered the door to the man throwing the parcel at me and saying it is for next door take it.
Next door is a HMO and 3 of the 4 cars that are connected to the house are currently parked outside of it. I've thrown the parcel back and told him someone is in and knock like a banshee at the right door not mine.
It is getting beyond a joke 4/5 times a week. They don't answer the door at all. Why should I be a courier for them.
So AIBU?
YABU
You are at home just answer the door and take in parcels
YANBU
You are not a courier service if they are not going to be in have it delivered to the corner shop 5mins away and pick it up from the secure location there.

OP posts:
nicericey · 17/05/2023 13:46

If you are not expecting a parcel do not open the door. You perpetuate the cycle by opening the door. Have you ever taken a parcel in for them? If so then don't ever do it again. Consider purchasing a laminator and making a sign that says OI MATE NO IF THE PARCEL AINT FOR ME IM NOT HAVING IT TA

ThatOnePlease · 17/05/2023 14:02

As pp said, sign on the door + do not answer. If some twat bangs on your door like that again, get the name and company and make a complaint.

Collaborate · 17/05/2023 14:05

nicericey · 17/05/2023 13:46

If you are not expecting a parcel do not open the door. You perpetuate the cycle by opening the door. Have you ever taken a parcel in for them? If so then don't ever do it again. Consider purchasing a laminator and making a sign that says OI MATE NO IF THE PARCEL AINT FOR ME IM NOT HAVING IT TA

I'm sorry, but I'm pretty sure you only find this attitude on Mumsnet.

Every sane person answers the door when someone knock/rings the bell. People are allowed to refuse to take a parcel for a neighbour.

I nearly always take a parcel in. There is one for next door that hsa been left in my porch for the last 4 days. I saw the delivery person put a note through their mail box and I'm sure (it was Evri) that they will have had an email as well. It will remain in my porch until either they come round or I see them in the street. It may well be a few months before I see them in the street but my poilcy is that if it's a small package it can stay there. Larger packages are not accepted for those neighbours that don't immediately collect their stuff.

I have never had a problem refusing to accept a large parcel for someone else.

nicericey · 17/05/2023 14:09

Collaborate · 17/05/2023 14:05

I'm sorry, but I'm pretty sure you only find this attitude on Mumsnet.

Every sane person answers the door when someone knock/rings the bell. People are allowed to refuse to take a parcel for a neighbour.

I nearly always take a parcel in. There is one for next door that hsa been left in my porch for the last 4 days. I saw the delivery person put a note through their mail box and I'm sure (it was Evri) that they will have had an email as well. It will remain in my porch until either they come round or I see them in the street. It may well be a few months before I see them in the street but my poilcy is that if it's a small package it can stay there. Larger packages are not accepted for those neighbours that don't immediately collect their stuff.

I have never had a problem refusing to accept a large parcel for someone else.

Show quote history

Yeah of course you are but once you open that door the courier knows you are in so will be desperate to hurl the parcel at you. A sign is much easier.

Blueeyes13 · 17/05/2023 14:12

I don't take parcels in for my one neighbour anymore. She's miserable, swears at my kids over the fence and threatens to shoot my dog. She also never collected her parcels, so I ended up having to take them over. Delivery guy doesn't seem bothered when I tell him I can't take her parcels.

daffodilandtulip · 17/05/2023 14:18

They ALL knock on the door like this now. Just because you can see me, doesn't mean I'm free to jump up for parcels every ten minutes. I'M WORKING.
I've actually got a sign on my door and they ignore it, or say something like "just this once."
Then I have to spend the evening chasing people, as no one bothers to come and collect them!

pussycatinfluffyslippers · 17/05/2023 14:18

Only answer the door if you're expecting something, obviously.

I rarely answer the door, I answer via the window. I open it a little bit to see what they want - difficult to shove a parcel through a small gap - so if it's either a cold-caller or something for someone else (who CBA to answer) I just grin and close the window. 👋🏻

Floralnomad · 17/05/2023 14:19

Either stop answering the door or put a polite note on the door saying that you do not accept parcels for neighbours .

Suprima · 17/05/2023 14:19

YANBU sounds v disruptive

I also absolutely hate neighbours taking in my parcels for me. It’s not an option on my evri, but yodel and some Evri couriers do it anyway I suppose to just unload the parcel. I have a safe place listed that I’d prefer they’d use.

I’ve had a nosy lady open my birthday present from DH once because they wanted to check nothing would ‘go off’ 🙄It was jewellery.

i also hate the awkwardness of going to retrieve them…and dealing with them being out, or wanting what has been delivered but it’s too late to knock.

CremeEggThief · 17/05/2023 14:21

Just don't open the door if you don't want to take the parcel. Simple.

Nordicrain · 17/05/2023 14:26

OP, I hear you. I WFH even before covid and the delivery people soon caught on. And my office is at the front of the house so the delivery people could see me so kept knocking/ ringing the bell.I even watched one not even try the correct house before bringing it to me. They often didn't leave notes either so NDN wouldn't come collect. It was a nightmare. One December I told them I wouldn't take anymore after our NDN had a car seat (not a baby one, an actual front seat for a car) and a huge sack of horse food delivered to our hallway, along with about 5 other parcels. I couldn't get out my front door!

So, YANBU

Chesneyhawkes1 · 17/05/2023 14:29

It's so annoying. I work shifts and when I'm on nights I turn off the doorbell and put a sign saying "night shift worker asleep - please do not knock"

Few hours after going to bed someone hammers on the door and wakes me up, with a parcel for next door 🤬🤬

TheKobayashiMaru · 17/05/2023 14:40

Collaborate · 17/05/2023 14:05

I'm sorry, but I'm pretty sure you only find this attitude on Mumsnet.

Every sane person answers the door when someone knock/rings the bell. People are allowed to refuse to take a parcel for a neighbour.

I nearly always take a parcel in. There is one for next door that hsa been left in my porch for the last 4 days. I saw the delivery person put a note through their mail box and I'm sure (it was Evri) that they will have had an email as well. It will remain in my porch until either they come round or I see them in the street. It may well be a few months before I see them in the street but my poilcy is that if it's a small package it can stay there. Larger packages are not accepted for those neighbours that don't immediately collect their stuff.

I have never had a problem refusing to accept a large parcel for someone else.

Show quote history

Every sane person answers the door when someone knock/rings the bell.

I don't answer the door every time someone rings or knocks. If I am expecting a parcel or visitor of course, but otherwise no.

Collaborate · 17/05/2023 14:57

TheKobayashiMaru · 17/05/2023 14:40

Every sane person answers the door when someone knock/rings the bell.

I don't answer the door every time someone rings or knocks. If I am expecting a parcel or visitor of course, but otherwise no.

Show quote history

That's my point. I don't think that's normal behaviour. It's only ever something I see mentioned on mumsnet.

Nordicrain · 17/05/2023 14:59

Collaborate · 17/05/2023 14:57

That's my point. I don't think that's normal behaviour. It's only ever something I see mentioned on mumsnet.

Show quote history

I agree. I think it's vry odd to not answer your door.

Original poster
Greenflamesburn · 17/05/2023 16:13

I wouldn't mind if they were out. They can't be arsed answering for someone else in the house. Why should I. It wasn't a small parcel and would get in my way. Plus they leave them for days!! I've tried to hand parcels to others that live there and the attitude is its not mine 🤔no but it belongs in that house you came from not mine.
Thank you for the replies I thought I was just being grumpy

OP posts:
CremeEggThief · 17/05/2023 17:45

I think it would be far, far weirder and ruder to open the door and refuse to take a parcel than to just not open the door if you're not in the mood. There is no way I could refuse not to take a parcel for someone, unless I hated him/her OR had good reason to suspect the parcel contains something illegal enough to risk prison...

CalloohCallayFrabjousDay · 17/05/2023 18:12

Greenflamesburn · 17/05/2023 16:13

I wouldn't mind if they were out. They can't be arsed answering for someone else in the house. Why should I. It wasn't a small parcel and would get in my way. Plus they leave them for days!! I've tried to hand parcels to others that live there and the attitude is its not mine 🤔no but it belongs in that house you came from not mine.
Thank you for the replies I thought I was just being grumpy

I would be wary of accepting parcels for a HMO. We had one next door and they were running some sort of scam, ordering things on stolen credit cards etc. had the police come round and tell us not to take anything for them.

TheKobayashiMaru · 17/05/2023 18:56

Collaborate · 17/05/2023 14:57

That's my point. I don't think that's normal behaviour. It's only ever something I see mentioned on mumsnet.

Show quote history

It is normal behaviour. I live in London and you get lots of people knocking for all sorts of reasons. Those wanting to sign you up to charities, people selling stuff and you have to be wary as you do get cases where someone opens the door they push in and rob you.

I have a Ring doorbell. I see who it is and I choose not to open the door. Totally normal.

Svalberg · 17/05/2023 21:10

Collaborate · 17/05/2023 14:05

I'm sorry, but I'm pretty sure you only find this attitude on Mumsnet.

Every sane person answers the door when someone knock/rings the bell. People are allowed to refuse to take a parcel for a neighbour.

I nearly always take a parcel in. There is one for next door that hsa been left in my porch for the last 4 days. I saw the delivery person put a note through their mail box and I'm sure (it was Evri) that they will have had an email as well. It will remain in my porch until either they come round or I see them in the street. It may well be a few months before I see them in the street but my poilcy is that if it's a small package it can stay there. Larger packages are not accepted for those neighbours that don't immediately collect their stuff.

I have never had a problem refusing to accept a large parcel for someone else.

Show quote history

Some of us have jobs that require concentration, and can't break off to answer the door every hour. If I'd answered the door yesterday every time there was a knock, I would have been disturbed and distracted 5 times. I have too much respect for the people who pay for my work to act as a parcel depository.

BrioLover · 17/05/2023 21:38

YANBU

They can sort their own parcels out. I have a note on my door that says I am sorry but I am on video calls and to please leave parcels for me in my safe place as listed on the delivery note. I've only had a couple of small parcels being left for neighbours in the last few months so it seems to be working.

Lndnmummy · 17/05/2023 21:45

Nordicrain · 17/05/2023 14:59

I agree. I think it's vry odd to not answer your door.

Show quote history

Why is it odd? I never answer the door, ever. Unless I have had a text from a delivery company notifying when parcel is due. I never answer the door otherwise.

TableTime99 · 17/05/2023 21:51

I always take in parcels for my neighbour if I can. If I'm in a meeting I can't nip out of to open the door, I have a laminated sign I stick on my door window that says 'in a meeting, please leave parcels in the shed'. Fixes the problem, but equally all my deliveries are handled pretty respectfully. Never had anyone banging on my door even when I don't answer (even before the sign!), which I'd find very annoying.

shivawn · 17/05/2023 21:51

To me it's no big deal to take a parcel in for my next door neighbour. I don't know them all that well but I'm happy to help. I luckily have a porch where delivery guys leave my parcels so I don't need anyone to take packages for me but I'm sure my neighbours would if they were asked.

Truestorypeeps · 17/05/2023 22:01

If I can see it's a cold caller (usually someone trying to switch my utilities), I used to answer the door and say no thank you, but I don't even bother now, I just ignore the doorbell. Easier that way.