It was a.big shock to me learning that my children had no interest whatsoever in old family photos, arguing that tney didn’t know who the people were anyway, didn’t want chidhood slides or photos of themselves even. We were never a family to have photos displayed. in the house.
Same with what I see as precious heirlooms, fMily artefacts, they couldnt care less.
Jewellery long gone to pay for food, car, gas bill etc., so I thought, sod it, I will be ruthless and I think its catching, I think its now endemic.
I have been death cleaning too, doing a proper job, very few documents now,
no valuables, anothing for my dd’s to fall out over.
If they ever displease me I threaten to cut them out of my will, eliciting shrieks of laughter.
When my mother cleared out my gran’s house I received nothing, when my sister cleared out my mother’s house of treasures I had nothing, whilst now of course her house is groaning with spoils.
I realised I wasn’t too bothered, I had my own treasures.
I have trained myself to walk past charity shops (ots so nard, there are 6! in this small town. Although I have had some lovely swag over the years, I am now fully committed to decluttering, downsizing, de everything, de stressing especially.
Most goes to a local charity shop in the town, Emmaus or BHF will pick up furniture, the rest is set out in the front garden with a notice on our local forum, saying help yourself, when we know someone else will be pleased and gleeful to have whatever they take.
Its so freeing. mentally too, then I think, why on earth have I been harbouring this item for so long when I never wanted it?!
Occasionally I have offered it back before disposing of said item.
So much is burdensome, lumbering us with stuff treasured by ancestors yet meaningless to us.
My aunt said she threw up trying to empty my Grans box of letters and cards
sent to and by her brothers killed in the war, so left them in their box for my cousin
who was definitely ruthless, as she couldn’t do it. Sentimental, sacred, sad, stuff.
This is a profound difficulty for many of us, being conscientious sensitive, archivists.
It’s important clearing out a house to sift through everything - lift the lining paper in drawers, put your fingers throughflour, sugar containers etc, for rings hidden, old ladies always had the same ideas. Set a sieve or colander over the sink or bin and tip out the contents. Go through any old books especially Bibles, for banknotes, put your hand to the back of drawers, go through coat pockets, tip up old shoes and boots, mattress, Toby jug, wondering why on earth ???