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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wheelchair vs buggies. Showdown on the bus

323 replies

SweetiePi3 · 14/05/2023 19:30

Today wasn't a good day for me. I had to go to the Princess Royal hospital. I waited for the bus, but when it arrived, the ramp wasn't deploying properly.
After the 3rd attempt, I lined up my chair, and as it came out, hanging an inch or so from the ground, I stormed up the ramp and into the bus.
Coming back, I had to change buses. The bus was full with three buggies in the wheelchair space.
The driver opened the back door and told me he had asked them to make space, but they refused.
I put my good foot in the doorway, preventing him from closing it and driving off.
He told them that I was holding the bus hostage until they made space. One mum folded her buggy, and one moved out of the way.
The third still refused, and while I was trying to explain the law to her, over her shouting, her partner started yelling at me.
I asked them what the sign said, but they said they were there first. I told them that the bus went move until I'm on it.
Meanwhile, people were leaving the bus. They gave in and took their buggy off while I boarded the ramp, then came in after me.
The bus driver drove off with the four of us lined up, one folded buggy, the other two, and me

OP posts:
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Sissynova · 14/05/2023 20:23

I don’t think the back story of your day is really relevant, you have no idea what anyone else had to go through on their day either.
Legally the last pushchair should have moved for you but what was the problem with her getting back on after you? The spaces are usually the length of half the bus and I feel like a wheelchair and one pushchair would fit fine as the other 2 were folded.

BlusteryLake · 14/05/2023 20:26

It's been the case for years, but still people can't get their head around the fact that it doesn't matter if they were there first, their children are lower priority than a wheelchair user. It's like this just doesn't compute for them.

Danikm151 · 14/05/2023 20:26

It’s even worse that she had a partner that could have held the baby whilst she folded the pushchair.

There’s many a time that I’ve moved the pushchair for a wheelchair or had to tell people to get off the seat where a wheelchair is going to fit. The entitlement really riles me up!

Sirzy · 14/05/2023 20:28

I think many parents forget that it was wheelchair users who fought hard for the wheelchair space which they now take for granted for their pram

Summerbubbles · 14/05/2023 20:28

I'm sorry that you had to go through that and also that you even need to ask if yabu.

I understand that it might be difficult for parents with buggies on public transport, but a wheelchair takes priority every time. I have less sympathy when there are two parents, one to hold the child, one to fold the buggy.

Saniflo · 14/05/2023 20:29

This is why I would always babywear on the bus.

pecantoucan · 14/05/2023 20:34

The bus driver drove off with the four of us lined up, one folded buggy, the other two, and me so after all that you all got on. They must have been really stupid to not realise there was space for you all

pecantoucan · 14/05/2023 20:35

Sissynova · 14/05/2023 20:23

I don’t think the back story of your day is really relevant, you have no idea what anyone else had to go through on their day either.
Legally the last pushchair should have moved for you but what was the problem with her getting back on after you? The spaces are usually the length of half the bus and I feel like a wheelchair and one pushchair would fit fine as the other 2 were folded.

I think the point was they could all fit with a bit of shuffling so what were the buggy parents fussing about

Original poster
SweetiePi3 · 14/05/2023 20:37

Sissynova · 14/05/2023 20:23

I don’t think the back story of your day is really relevant, you have no idea what anyone else had to go through on their day either.
Legally the last pushchair should have moved for you but what was the problem with her getting back on after you? The spaces are usually the length of half the bus and I feel like a wheelchair and one pushchair would fit fine as the other 2 were folded.

I did say clearly that everyone fitted in after reshuffling. No one was left behind.

OP posts:
adfs · 14/05/2023 20:39

If the bus is full (of certain spaces, be that seats or otherwise) then it is full. We all have to wait at busy times.

OddsocksinmyDocs · 14/05/2023 20:39

The bus driver can do nothing else apart from ask. The driver is put in a horrible situation too. I'm speaking as somebody who knows many.

pecantoucan · 14/05/2023 20:39

adfs · 14/05/2023 20:39

If the bus is full (of certain spaces, be that seats or otherwise) then it is full. We all have to wait at busy times.

Not the wheelchair space - that is for a wheelchair user

pecantoucan · 14/05/2023 20:40

OddsocksinmyDocs · 14/05/2023 20:39

The bus driver can do nothing else apart from ask. The driver is put in a horrible situation too. I'm speaking as somebody who knows many.

Yeah I get that. I wish they were allowed to pass on CCTV and get the police to fine them.

Sissynova · 14/05/2023 20:40

SweetiePi3 · 14/05/2023 20:37

I did say clearly that everyone fitted in after reshuffling. No one was left behind.

Show quote history

I’m aware of that. I just wasn’t sure if you were implying there was something wrong with her getting back on after you.

It’s good you all could fit and stay on the bus imo. Pity it was so long and dragged out to get to the end goal.

Nanny0gg · 14/05/2023 20:41

pecantoucan · 14/05/2023 20:40

Yeah I get that. I wish they were allowed to pass on CCTV and get the police to fine them.

Show quote history

You'll be lucky if the CCTV is on!

BluesandClues · 14/05/2023 20:42

In the days of yore when I was a kid, you’d see the bus coming collapse the buggy and lug it all on. It was just how it was, and everyone was used to it.

Additionally, you can collapse a buggy and hold a baby. You can’t collapse a wheelchair and hold a grown adult can you!

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 14/05/2023 20:43

Bloody well done!

Veryverycalmnow · 14/05/2023 20:44

They absolutely should have moved- i.e, got off and waited for the next one. It is the law. I hope it won't put you off getting the bus. Hopefully they were one- off bus users, as they didn't seem to know the rules/ bus etiquette/ manners.

WeightoftheWorld · 14/05/2023 20:44

Awful. So sorry you had to go through that. I don't drive so I've got the bus loads of times with a pram, I usually get at least one return trip a week atm with my preschooler alongside me, and the toddler in the buggy. In the 5 yrs of me getting the bus I've been lucky and never once had to get off a bus or fold up a pram, only one time ever has a wheelchair user got on a bus I've been on and they were able to fit ok with some shuffling and squashing on my part with the buggy. However I've always known that a time could come when I may have to get off to make room or whatever. It's clear from the signage on the bus and of course a wheelchair user gets priority over my buggy if it comes down to it. My DGF God bless his soul was a long term wheelchair user and before he became disabled, he was himself a bus driver. So perhaps all of that has of course affected my outlook on it.

Sissynova · 14/05/2023 20:46

BluesandClues · 14/05/2023 20:42

In the days of yore when I was a kid, you’d see the bus coming collapse the buggy and lug it all on. It was just how it was, and everyone was used to it.

Additionally, you can collapse a buggy and hold a baby. You can’t collapse a wheelchair and hold a grown adult can you!

Well you typically can’t collapse a pram for an under 6 month. Not that it matters, legally they would just have to get off then.

MrsMikeDrop · 14/05/2023 20:46

Good on you for standing your ground. I'm sorry you had to encounter such scummy low-life people, perhaps it's time to stop buggies on if people continue to behave like that

Jungleblur · 14/05/2023 20:46

It’s shocking the amount that this happens. A few years ago my partner was waiting at a bus stop for over half an hour, there was a girl in a wheelchair who’d been there even longer. Two women with prams turned up just before the bus arrived and hurried straight on, then the driver told the girl in the wheelchair that she couldn’t come on because there was no space left. My partner went mad at the driver but he just shouted back, shut the doors and drove off.

I’d love to see these people spend just a week confined to a wheelchair.

Suddenlysummer · 14/05/2023 20:46

@TomatoSandwiches Thank you.

ElizabethBest · 14/05/2023 20:46

I’ve had to fold down my disabled son’s adaptive pushchair and wrestle with him to accommodate another wheelchair user after several people with pushchairs flatly refused.

I might have “accidentally” run over their feet whilst unfolding it again to get him off the bus at our stop…..

Chelseyrd91 · 14/05/2023 20:49

So happy with the comments on this one, there is hope for humanity after all! Good on you for showing them that they can't just act like children, because they have them!