To ask for advice re DV and child contact.

[Stressedafff]

I’m being abused. I want to leave.

Im absolutely petrified that my partner will end up with unsupervised or even overnight and 50/50 access to my daughter
He isn’t on birth certificate. Not married. Council property in my name only

I don’t want him around her. He’s aggressive, nasty, foul mouthed and he barely bothers with her anyway. He insults and screams and threatens me in front of her. She is 3. I don’t want my baby around him or his family as they are drug users and enablers. This is what’s stopping me leaving.

Does anyone have any advice because I can’t live like this anymore but I don’t want my baby with him. She wouldn’t be safe.

OP which family member and/or friend are the least judgemental?

Contact them today.

First send them a few general messages maybe about your baby and if they respond then phone them if he's not around to listen to you.

SS will just want him gone and you showing that you have the ability to safeguard her. You need to be phoning the police. Get them to remove him from the property, get the locks change then report everything. Tell people the truth, ask for help. My GC's father had his PR removed, my DD had lived with a level of DV, didn't tell us etc, once she showed that she was getting rid of him for good, they signed her off. She had to do the freedom programme with local DV services. It was a great help and got her access to other stuff.

Download the app bright sky. It can record abuse securely. The next time he goes crazy, hit the record button.
In the meantime, make a report with the police about the abuse. You can do this online now, just find your local forces website and go from there. It's common for them to give you a crime and hold everything on file until you're ready to move forward.
By the way, the authorities really dislike it when children are witnesses to any sort of abuse and take it seriously.
Reach out to your housing officer to see what you can do in regards to accommodation and women's aid are good too.
If your DASH score is high enough, you'll also have an IVDA.

In my experience, it's all about control for these men. Loss of control can cause a massive escalation, so all of your moves must be very calculated until you're physically safe from him.
Start finding essential documents now and find a way to give them to someone trusted.
Look into an occupation order and non molestation order.

Contact Woman’s Aid or Refuge for advice.

Social Services are familiar with the fact that many women hide the truth. They understand why, so don’t worry about that. Get back in touch with them ASAP.

Luckily, my Father was not on the tenancy when we fled. That sound decision should make things a whole lot easier for you re. rehousing if you end up having to move home.

I only have my mum. She’s gonna hit the roof because I’ve lied and lied to her
I don’t have any friends anymore

Yes your mum will probably go ballistic but ultimately she'll want to help and protect you. I went through it with my Dad when I finally admitted that I was being abused. Of course he went crazy because I couldn't see the abuse for what it was and made excuses for years but right now he's my biggest supporter.

I think you should seriously consider moving. If you start the ball rolling with women's aid, people fleeing domestic violence are high category priority on the lists for social housing. This man sounds dangerous. Don't under-estimate his ability to cause you harm.

You said all your support network is where you are now and now it's you only have your mum who doesn't sound massively supportive if she will react like that. what other support network was you referring to? Maybe moving isn't that bad in that case?