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Shamelessly posting for traffic - wedding related

33 replies

Damnthebj · 12/05/2023 23:12

I am in a quandary as to which wedding to book… Please can you help?

Both are destination weddings. DP and I are not the same nationality. Both choices are 5 star hotels with excellent wine and food. I will not mention cost of each, as this is not the deciding factor. Second time round for both of us.

WEDDING A

Best way to describe it would be a sophisticated beach wedding. Absolutely magical setting, in a country neither of us are from. But my DParents live locally. This would likely be the smaller of the two choices, perhaps 20 guests as I am not sure if DPs friends and family would travel. It would have to be in September of this year, which leaves me with 4 months to plan it. Only, I am leaving on an extended work trip tomorrow that will likely only end a week or two before the proposed date. I am not sure that my parents would travel to the other destination, as they are old and not keen on traveling much. If this option gets chosen, I believe we would have to have a registry wedding int he country he is from for my residential status. This is not a deterrent, just another thing

WEDDING B

Beautiful city location, and I have picked a time when it’s at its best, in March of next year. I would estimate the guest list to be around 50. It is in the country that DP is from, but not where we live. I have many friends in the country too as I have tried very hard to integrate and settle. However, I am not sure if my DParents would make the journey. As with most spring weddings, the weather is not guaranteed, but I would have more time to plan.

I cannot decide but need to as deposits are needed shortly.

Any wise insights welcome…

OP posts:
Damnthebj · 13/05/2023 00:46

Thank you all. A it is!

OP posts:
mosiacmaker · 13/05/2023 05:56

Wedding A, and hopefully his brother will come. But do the registry thing and a nice lunch with friends/fam who won’t make the destination of wedding A.

HungryandIknowit · 13/05/2023 06:01

A so your parents can come. Also agree a post registry dinner in DP's home country is a nice idea.

pecantoucan · 13/05/2023 06:03

Smaller one. Give your parents a chance to be there.

Toddlerteaplease · 13/05/2023 09:16

I wouldn't travel to a 5 star destination wedding with only 3 months notice. So you may not have any guests as many people will be in the same situation.

8misskitty8 · 13/05/2023 09:25

bil and SIL are from opposite ends of the uk.
They had a small wedding abroad with just parents and best man/bridesmaid and had their honeymoon.
Then a celebration party with SIL family and a 2nd celebration party with BIL family when they came back to the uk.
This worked really well and SIL got to wear her wedding dress 3 times !

Banditdog · 13/05/2023 09:48

I think you need an Option C as neither of these seem especially suitable.

Damnthebj · 13/05/2023 11:35

Thanks for the further replies

@mosiacmaker unfortunately his brother is immobile, so that really wont happen. I don’t think he would make it to either

@HungryandIknowit thank you

@Toddlerteaplease yes, this is why I say it would be a smaller affair

@Banditdog sadly, there is no plan c. Unless we elope but this will cause to much hurt so its A or B at this stage

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