To think it's weird nobody has contacted me?

[Lemonfizzy]

Today DP got a message from an old friend/colleague from a few years ago who was just checking in to see how he was. Colleague moved away and they hadn't spoken for years. I think they'd seen some news that reminded them of DP and they decided to say hi, which is nice. Past colleagues and acquaintances often message DP out of the blue.

It got me thinking. I can't remember any time in my adult life when anyone I used to know well, but lost touch with, has reached out to me to 'reconnect' or simply ask me how I am. I went to uni, have had a fair few jobs, and have been a member of various clubs/teams/groups over the years, so I've known plenty of people.

Is it just me? I've got a handful of long-term friends, it just seems once I'm out of peoples' lives they just forget, or don't care about me anymore!

Should have added, I've messaged the odd few people over the years to see how they are. I like to stay in touch with people, but seems like most don't and just move on to whoever serves them and their needs best at any given time?

I often think about many of the people I've known over the years, but know they've almost certainly completely forgotten I exist.

Someone I was Facebook friends with after we got talking on an internet forum did a thing once where she messaged a different Facebook friend every week with the aim of ‘speaking’ to everyone through the year. We’d never met in person and didn’t know much about each other apart from our mutual liking for the internet forum. She said she had a lot of friends listed she never hears from or interacts with - I’m a lurker who very rarely posts on Facebook. I thought it was good to talk to her and we still message occasionally now. I always thought that was a good idea but I’ve never done it, but it might be worth a try? I think most people just cba to make the effort but do appreciate it when someone else does.

What alternative phrase would you approve of?

It's called modern day venacular. People don't speak like they did in the 1950s anymore I'm afraid.

Past colleagues and acquaintances often message DP out of the blue.

This is the bit I am more surprised about.

I mean, I would have thought many of us have "friends of a time" - as you say school friends, Uni friends (if applicable), ex colleagues, maybe ex neighbours, maybe parents of your dcs' friends - who you got on well with when they were around and you saw them regularly, but they never transcended to being really good friends that you kept in touch with for any amount of time when that connection was no longer there, and one of you moved on.
So, you keep in touch with the odd one who became that good friend, but, as a rule, you don't then have many of those friends look you up later.

What does your DP do, that makes people randomly think of him 20 years later, and want to track him down to get in touch ?

This!

Also, is your DH in a good job with a good company? I'm wondering if these 'friends' are just networking (which is all fine too)?

Stop saying FGS, this isn't a text to a friend.

My sisters still get asked "Are you Notme's sister?" I must have made an impression as a teenager with an unusual first name. I’m in my 30s and haven't been very socially active since then. I don't reach out at all either. I think it's kind of nice that people remember me. Might be down to being from a different walk of life from most - goth and friendly. I’m still the same. It's always nice to be remembered, especially as a lone parent decades later and worlds apart.

Same for me. I contact old friends, am always the organiser / inviter. No one has ever dropped me a message out of the blue just to catch up!

I'm very forgettable and get overlooked in many situations. My boss even sent an email.to our whole team recently about a project I've been part of, thanking everyone involved by name except me!

I'm beginning to withdraw and stop bothering with people, they never bother with me!