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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To wonder what you think is a reasonable living space for a family

80 replies

BelleMarionette · 10/05/2023 19:37

For a family house, with children, what would you say is a reasonable number of square metres. I know the perception varies wildly.

For example, for a family with four children, how many square meters do you think would allow for reasonable living standards? How many for a family with two children?

When people have seen my house, they have either thought it was decently sized, or very small.

OP posts:

MyBubble · 10/05/2023 19:40

What’s the point of this q ?

if you feel you have adequate space then great who cares if someone thinks your house is small they are not living in it

Sissynova · 10/05/2023 19:41

When people have seen my house, they have either thought it was decently sized, or very small.

Groundbreaking

IsItHalfTermYetHelp · 10/05/2023 19:42

There isn’t one answer to this. Some people need more space than others. Minimalists who are out most of the time will need a lot less than those with lots of possessions who have a home gym/sewing room/pool table/Great Dane/full size tennis court. Obv people live in tiny flats in London/Hong kong/New York. And others think every child needs a double room and en suite.

MrsCharlieD · 10/05/2023 19:55

I would have no idea in terms of square footage but for me I like every child to have their own bedroom, a downstairs loo is a must and 2 bathrooms. We live in a new build and have all this but still feel we need more space. I love our house though, sure I'd love something more impressive but I'm grateful for what we have and that we own. Does anyone actually know the measurements of their house ? I wouldn't have a clue !

TidyHomeTidyMind · 10/05/2023 19:55

Sq footage doesn't matter so much as how the space is used.
Personally I think a bedroom per child so they don't have to share is important, I would rather they all had a small bedroom of their own rather than share a large bedroom.

totallybonafido · 10/05/2023 20:01

My house is about 150m2 and I'd say it's on the generous side for our family of 4. All the bedrooms are really good sizes and we have plenty of space downstairs.

totallybonafido · 10/05/2023 20:03

Previous house was 70m2 and that was fine for 2 but we struggled once we had the DC.

Comedycook · 10/05/2023 20:05

I also don't know about square footage...but I think a bedroom for each child, a second bathroom or at least an extra loo...either a large kitchen diner and a reception room or a small kitchen is ok if you have two reception rooms.

Unbridezilla · 10/05/2023 20:05

Another one who thinks sqft isn't the important factor, but how the space is used. If downstairs is all open plan, I think you'd need more space than if there were 2 reception rooms and a kitchen for example

Nevermind31 · 10/05/2023 20:16

I do think both number of rooms, size of them and square footage is important. As is storage. Storage is very important.
if you are happy I’m your house, great!
sil has a four bedroom, 3 bathroom house that was extended out and up, and now has about 1000 square foot. I find if tiny and claustrophobic, but she loves it.
but I find most average English houses tiny and claustrophobic, especially if there is no storage.
as a couple, we had just over 1000 square foot, as a family of 4, twice that.

Klassfit · 10/05/2023 20:19

Ours is 180sq ft for a family of 5 (from the Rightmove listing). It feels the right size for us - a bedroom for all dc, 2 bathrooms, downstairs toilet and 3 reception areas. The layout is not how I'd like though - one bedroom is much smaller and the master bedroom is too big, would rather they were more equal. And there's too much open plan, I would prefer if 2 of the reception areas were separate (as they were originally).

My perfect home would have one extra room for me (for hobbies) and a spare bedroom for guests. And a bigger utility. But it's hard to find in this area as most homes are built smaller than ours (which was extended by previous owner).

Klassfit · 10/05/2023 20:21

*Should be 180 sq m

Namechangebunfightcoming · 10/05/2023 20:27

Reasonable living standards with 4 children - I would think 300sq m. We have loads of space and vey comfortable in this size with 2 DC so think with 4 DC living standards would be reasonable at that size.

BarkyMatherson · 10/05/2023 20:29

Free range chickens get 4 square metres per hen, battery hens only get 600cm squared so it depends if you’re free ranging or battery.

LolaSmiles · 10/05/2023 20:32

I don't think size of family matters as much as what sort of lifestyle they have chosen.

Being idealistic for us, I'd say children from junior school upwards would ideally have their own room, or the option to if they choose to share. We don't need a large open plan kitchen-dining space, but would like a utility room. Space for an office and/or playroom downstairs would also be nice. The rooms don't need to be big for us but we would need to be able to zone the house for our lifestyle.

hettiethehare · 10/05/2023 20:32

We have 3 DC and a 4 bed with 150 m2 of living space, which increases to 198 m2 when you include the loft and cellar spaces (so decent amounts of storage). 2 bathrooms, but no downstairs loo. A kitchen and two reception rooms downstair, plus separate hall. 4 double bedrooms.

We feel very comfortable and spacious here - we had 110 m2 in our old property and that definitely felt claustrophobic, but 2 DC had to share and the living space was all open plan.

Rtmhwales · 10/05/2023 20:35

Our house is 325 m2 with three children. I'd be happy to have 2 more children in the mix, size wise.

HolidayHankering · 10/05/2023 20:46

As a city dweller used to small flats, I think 750 square feet is comfortable for a couple.

Really though a lot will depend on the layout of the rooms. Sometimes you can have a lot of square footage, but a very awkward shape means you can't really get the use out of it. Too many doors opening off the space etc.

Peppadog · 10/05/2023 20:49

I'm interested to see others thinking that open plan isn't that great. I'd rather have separate rooms any day.

Anyway, OP this is a question noone can really answer. This is Mumsnet so of course you've got lots of answers about every child having their own room, and some even saying you need 300 square metres(!).
The average UK house size is 76 square metres, so this clearly isn't representative of real life.

My MIl was one of 9 and grew up happily in a 2 bed cottage. Granted they had a fair bit of outdoor space as it was on a farm, but she had a fantastic upbringing. This is obviously very unusual and often wouldn't work well in the modern world, but what I am saying is circumstances and expectations differ so much. In some cultures everyone sharing one room is completely normal for example.

We have a 5 bed house and 3dc. My 2dc have chosen to share and the 3rd is a baby so is in with me. The elder two want him to go in with them when he is big enough. So I will probably end up with 3 rooms not being used as bedrooms for a while. We will make use of that space of course but it isn't essential.
Yes kids grow up and want more space IDEALLY, but it's not the be all and end all. There are plenty of ways to have a happy family and space is one small part of it.

Crikeyalmighty · 10/05/2023 20:54

We have 162sqm for the 2 of us - I don't look at anything under 138sqm as we've got 'a lot of stuff' plus my H needs a very large room or 2 smaller rooms for work related stuff.

I think anything around 125sqm upwards is ok for a family depending on layout- below that can be a bit crowded- but obviously budget is on the mix!

LolaSmiles · 10/05/2023 21:20

I'm interested to see others thinking that open plan isn't that great. I'd rather have separate rooms any day.
I think open plan in a trend sense will date a bit like the lounge diners with the small separate kitchen dated. They're reflecting a type of living that was popular at a time.

I like kitchen-diners and a separate sitting room that we can try to keep the worst of the child mess out of but don't like the very large back of house extended kitchen diners with the black windows and big bifold doors. Fully open plan would be my worst nightmare.

PuttingDownRoots · 10/05/2023 21:20

We have lived in 7 homes in the past 12 years, in different places and countries. From a 3 bed flat to a 5 bed house. And honestly... you expand to fit the larger space, then panic initially in a smaller space before realising its quite adequate.

I agree that a bedroom per child is optimal but not necessarily essential as long as there are other bolthole.

Crikeyalmighty · 10/05/2023 21:39

@LolaSmiles I actually like those but like a big lounge too !! And often they have pokey lounges when they have enormous kitchens.

LolaSmiles · 10/05/2023 21:43

Crikeyalmighty
I believe the pokey lounges have been rebranded as snugs. 🤣

It'll be interesting to see if in 10/20 years time people start putting walls back up and making separate reception rooms

Original poster

BelleMarionette · 10/05/2023 21:45

I realise it's hugely subjective, but I'm interested in people's opinions. Based on this thread some would definitely think we are cramped: about 130m2. But for London I feel pretty fortunate. I am ruthless about decluttering though.

OP posts:

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