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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AA lied! WWYD?

261 replies

misstrot · 09/05/2023 12:48

I am FUMING! Lies! OMG-please read-sorry it's long-I need advice!
DD (20) hit a small piece of debris on motorway on the way home from uni on the motorway. Car seemed ok but next time she took it out it overheated so we called AA. Patrolman said everything was fine-it just needed oil and water (he filled water but we had to go get the oil) Now DD is a bit nervy driving so she asked was he sure it was ok to drive back to uni (2 hr drive) and he assured her-yes. Then I asked him and he said he 'wouldn't send a young girl onto the motorway in the car if he didn't believe the car was perfectly safe and roadworthy' Enter DH who asks him is he sure ok-doesn't need to be checked at the garage as his DD is very precious and he wants her to be safe etc-again AA reiterates 'all safe-all roadworthy-doesn't need anything doing"- I follow him to the van to input my email/sign attendance from and he tells me no need.
You guessed it-she goes back to uni and breaks down on the M4 in bad weather (it takes 5+ hours for them to send a recovery truck and she is traumatised!)
We get the car delivered back here and ask a local garage to come and look. The garage owner states the car had a severe water leak (the AA didn't pressure test the system) which has caused car to overheat and blown the head gasket-so dead. Bearing in mind DD worked and saved up all summer and only bought the car in August- from a reputable National chain and paid £4000 (it's a little mini) she is devastated.
Ok, so we send report to AA and ask for compensation/new (2nd hand) engine for car. They send an 'Independant Assessor' (paid for by AA and does most of his work for AA so not really independent!?) who literally spends 4 mins taking photos -opens the bonnet and says the head gasket has gone and leaves. His report states that it was our fault for driving it as the head gasket had gone (for clarity it was fine before-no smoke from exhaust and only had a full service and 120 point check in August etc)
The AA then state the patrolman informed us that the car was not roadworthy and should be taken to a garage so they don't hold liability!!!!!! WTF! A complete LIE and 360 on what he said to us. Sadly too late to download Ring doorbell footage to support us -as its gone and he never sent us an emailed report stating what he did or advised-normal protocol. Help! What can I do?

OP posts:
Original poster
misstrot · 09/05/2023 16:58

bunnyrabbitsandbutterflies · 09/05/2023 14:11

You should have received an email of the report that you signed on your drive. Surely that can be re-sent by AA?

Either way, did the car not indicate it was overheating on the journey back to Uni? The temp gauge would have been off the scale to blow the head gasket.

I followed him to his van to sign and he said there was ‘no need’ (would never fall for that again) so no report!
She did stop when it overheated but obviously too late!

OP posts:
Floralnomad · 09/05/2023 16:58

Surely if you hit debris and your car keeps over heating you go to a proper garage not get an AA man out , as those 2 things would naturally indicate a leak somewhere ( radiator / hose etc ) and an AA man isn’t going to fix that because they are not a garage on wheels they are a breakdown service .

Rummikub · 09/05/2023 16:58

What happens then btw? If op had picked up dd? Would the AA have still recovered the car?

Grapefruittea · 09/05/2023 16:59

Seriously, some of these responses are quite harsh to the OP! Her daughter is obviously quite a new driver... many people find motorways horrible to drive on so it is understandable that she was probably pretty scared. Especially if it was a smart motorway. I would be annoyed if the AA man had said the car was safe to drive after repeated enquiries only for the car to break down again. The OP was rightly concerned about her daughter's safety like any good parent would be. OP - you're well within your rights to be annoyed. It's frustrating that you can't do anything about it but maybe your daughter could do an advance driving course to get her confidence back up again xx

Original poster
misstrot · 09/05/2023 16:59

littleripper · 09/05/2023 14:27

There are 2 things here:

  1. AA let her down and gave poor advice but are unlikely to be legally negligent
  2. if she is so lacking in resilience that 5 hours on the hard shoulder traumatises her she should not be driving/going out alone and needs therapy

Thanks for your care and support-do you have young adult children?!

OP posts:
Original poster
misstrot · 09/05/2023 17:02

LisaVanderpump1 · 09/05/2023 14:40

OP, it sounds like your daughter might not be mature enough to be on the road. She's a nervous driver, "traumatised" by having to wait for a recovery vehicle (not sure I've ever experienced this as anything more than annoying and boring) and seemingly doesn't know the correct thing to do when her car's showing signs of difficulty.

Have you ever stood on the side of a motorway? It’s actually pretty terrifying and dangerous and throw on cold rainy weather and darkness and no way to charge your phone-very unpleasant!

OP posts:
Heartsnrainbows · 09/05/2023 17:05

Why didn't she pull over when she saw the temp rising?

Does it have a temperature gauge? My car doesn't.

Original poster
misstrot · 09/05/2023 17:06

SpeckledlyHen · 09/05/2023 15:07

I'm not really understanding why you would call the AA if the car had previously overheated. I thought the AA were for emergency call outs and non starts, not for a mechanical investigation of a previous problem. Surely you should have got it checked out by a garage rather than asking them if it was roadworthy. There would have been no way of them checking this without a full service/health check.

It had not previously overheated? We called them because it had-if patrol said he didn’t know or needing looking at I would have taken straight to garage!

OP posts:
Butitsnotfunnyisititsserious · 09/05/2023 17:06

SchoolTripDrama · 09/05/2023 16:07

OP, it's a total waste of time asking for advice on here, you just get cross examined

How can you give advice if you don't ask for relevant information? Otherwise you could give incorrect advice, which would be a total waste of time.

VivatVaginaCamilla · 09/05/2023 17:06

theemmadilemma · 09/05/2023 16:36

Haha love people with lack of reading comprehension coming on to Mumsnet just for comments like this! Why are there so many of them?

It's not a male poster. 🙄

Show quote history

No, but it's a twate to judge from their spelling of "twatty".

@misstrot I am not sure how far you would get with any kind of complaint to the AA, but I'd definitely complaining as they led you well and truly up the garden path.

I don't have any kind of social media, but don't people normally suggest you put something on Twitter or Facebook or some such? Maybe your daughter could, if you're not a social media type?

Original poster
misstrot · 09/05/2023 17:08

TheShellBeach · 09/05/2023 15:12

Are people actually reading the OP?
She's angry because the AA are lying about what was originally said to the DD.

Thank you! Yes! That’s why I’m upset - he lied!!!! All he had to do was say ‘sorry yes I said it was fine’ but he bareface lied!
Everyone seems caught up on the ‘did she pull over soon enough’ question when what I’m upset about is the lying….

OP posts:
YellowAndGreenToBeSeen · 09/05/2023 17:09

How did she break down by the side of the road (the first time) & get checked / her oil topped up by the 1st AA man but you ‘followed’ him to sign the email etc?

I’m pretty good at comprehension but this one’s got me confused.

Whatthediddlyfeck · 09/05/2023 17:09

Doppe · 09/05/2023 15:51

I’m surprised how many people are belittling the danger of being stuck on a hard shoulder! I’m not surprised the OP’s daughter was frightened. I would have been. People are killed and injured every year from accidents involving vehicles stopped on hard shoulders.

Usually when they don’t heed the advice to get out of the vehicle

ChairFloorWall · 09/05/2023 17:11

neverknowinglyunreasonable · 09/05/2023 13:37

Lol! Will there be a third comment? A hat-trick of uselessness?

Show quote history

And your comments are helpful how?

YellowAndGreenToBeSeen · 09/05/2023 17:12

Ignore me. I’ve re-read for the 5th time and now I get it.

  1. daughter hits debris but makes it home
  2. goes out in car again - overheats. AA called to home
  3. AA man says ‘all good - oil & water needed’
  4. daughter drives. Car overheats again & gasket goes
  5. AA man says ‘told you to get it checked out’
  6. OP v. cross
Blossomtoes · 09/05/2023 17:12

Rummikub · 09/05/2023 16:41

Yes?

From their website:

Will the AA come to my house?If you add At Home to your policy, we'll come to you if your car breaks down at home.
When you need us, we'll usually get to you in under an hour, or at a time that suits you.
We fix 9 out of 10 breakdowns at home, and if we can't fix your vehicle, we'll sort out the recovery of your vehicle as usual.

Show quote history

It hadn’t broken down.

Original poster
misstrot · 09/05/2023 17:13

Amispringy · 09/05/2023 15:12

Traumatised
Nervy driver
Mummy and daddy getting involved

I hope OP's DD isn't driving the same roads as me.

So once they hit 18 you’re supposed to stop looking out for them?! Glad I’m not your child!! Most new drivers are a little nervous of motorway driving alone…..

OP posts:
Rummikub · 09/05/2023 17:15

Whatthediddlyfeck · 09/05/2023 17:09

Usually when they don’t heed the advice to get out of the vehicle

Show quote history

I don’t the barrier would stop a truck or ploughing through.

I don’t think I understood how scary it was to breakdown and wait on hard shoulder. I did that last year and it was frightening. For context I’m a confident driver and regularly do 90 miles/day for my inter city commute.

bd67thSaysReinstateLangCleg · 09/05/2023 17:16

Male101 · 09/05/2023 13:12

Why didn't she pull over when she saw the temp rising?

A lot of cars don't have a temperature gauge. Mine doesn't.

Floralnomad · 09/05/2023 17:17

Why didn’t you and your husband go to where she broke down and one of you could have stayed with the car and she could have been taken back to uni by the other parent . That’s what my husband and I would have done if it were our daughter

Original poster
misstrot · 09/05/2023 17:20

YellowAndGreenToBeSeen · 09/05/2023 17:12

Ignore me. I’ve re-read for the 5th time and now I get it.

  1. daughter hits debris but makes it home
  2. goes out in car again - overheats. AA called to home
  3. AA man says ‘all good - oil & water needed’
  4. daughter drives. Car overheats again & gasket goes
  5. AA man says ‘told you to get it checked out’
  6. OP v. cross

Lol- correct!
im upset about the lie more than anything- but also the poor advice! Would have taken to the garage if he thought at all iffy!

OP posts:
flutterbyebaby · 09/05/2023 17:22

You and your dh seem to treat her as a child, maybe teach her some resilience

bd67thSaysReinstateLangCleg · 09/05/2023 17:23

Male101 · 09/05/2023 15:27

Who said I was male?

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Have you seen your own username?

ChairFloorWall · 09/05/2023 17:23

Why is everyone being so cruel about OPs daughter? Why would anyone want to be stuck on the side of the motorway! She handled it well, OP, ignore the negative comments! They’re probably worse drivers than your DD!

Original poster
misstrot · 09/05/2023 17:24

SpeckledlyHen · 09/05/2023 15:29

Yes, but the car was not broken down. It had previously overheated. The AA are not a maintenance service, they would not have all had all of the equipment or the skill to do a full health check/service to determine categorically whether the car was roadworthy or not. The OP should have got it checked over by a garage if at all concerned about the car. This does not fall on the responsibility of the AA.

Show quote history

He failed to pressure test the system to discover the water leak (which is why it originally overheated -he just topped up the water)
if he had had any doubts or wasn’t sure we would have taken it to a garage but he declared it 100% roadworthy. Then lied- that’s what I’m upset about!

OP posts:
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