holiday with his dad

[Boymummy1401]

My ex and i split 6 months ago due to many reasons.

We share a 3yo together and he is a good dad.

My ex lived in Australia years ago for 2 years and has obsessed about livig there ever since (one of the reasons why we split). My ex is a bully by nature and often tells me that one day he will be living there as will my son. He has told me in the past he is willing to say/do anything he can to make this happen. He has, on one occasion said he knows where to take him where they will never be found. None of this i can prove sadly.

The reason for my post is he has this morning asked if he can take lo to Australia next january for 3 weeks for a holiday. I said no and he replied well im on the birth certificate so its happening whether you like it or not.

I genuinely do not think he will kidnap our son - i think he knows this would ruin his life BUT i do not want him to for the following reasons:

1. He's only 3 - its the other side of the world.
2. He has never been away from me or his brother for more than 2 nights.
3. There is no reason for him to take him to australia - there are so many places he could take him that arent so far away.
4. He's doing this to hurt me - he knows this will make me sick being away from him for so long and he just replies that i better get used to it as he will be living there soon.

He says all of this with a smug face and to be honest im terrified of what hes going to try and do.

You would need to have a court order and custody agreement covering holidays abroad to stop him doing it without your permission as I'd of thought the default would be 50/50.

If you genuinely don’t think he would ‘kidnap’ him then of course YABU. He’s asked in plenty of time to get your son used to being apart from you, you no why he wants to visit Australia as you’ve told us in your OP. And you don’t own the child, he’s 50% yours and 50% his dads, so without a court order there’s nothing you can do anyway. I do totally understand your concerns, but it’s plenty of notice and he’s the dad so I can’t see a valid reason to stop it.