To be terrified of having surgery?

[Daisythecat15]

I'm having my first surgery in 8 days and I'm absolutely terrified.

I can't stop thinking that I won't wake up from the anaesthetic. Is that stupid? I know the chances of it happening are tiny (I got given a leaflet and it said it's a 5 in 1 million chance) but I just can't shake the fear!! I keep feeling like I'm getting closer and closer to the last day of my life.

How do I get over this? Is it normal to feel this way? For context I'm having major abdominal surgery, so I'm also very nervous about pain etc but my main fear is being put under.

I found my kids having a GA the first time nerve racking but for me I love general anesthetic. You get a great sleep during the day! The staff are used to people being worried about surgery so they are extra kind and reassuring and everyone fusses over you and brings you food in bed when you wake up. I kind of see it as a vacation - I think its because I am a full time mum and like the break!

Like others, I love being anaesthetised. It's like a warm, fuzzy hug!

Understandable to have nerves of course, but try not to worry as it's such a waste of head space over something that won't happen.

I was rushed for emergency spinal surgery last week having never had a GA before I was really worried but also being a nurse I knew I was in good hands. These incidents are extremely rare but due to litigation they have to be communicated to you. I was told there was a 1/800 chance I could be paralysed from the surgery but equally I couldn't walk due to my condition, it was a scary decision. Speak to the team about your concerns they will be really understanding and will help put you at ease. I hope you recover well OP

I seem to have an operation most years and used to get really anxious. I asked to be first in the list and this really helped. Now I’m fine.

I was really scared too for my knee surgery. I felt so panicked going down and when they were bustling about doing the wires and things because its easy to think about how invasive the treatment is going to be and its horrific to think of being cut open. But then it really is amazing how you just feel like you are having a really great sleep. I woke up feeling pretty good, no pain or anything. Quite amazing really looking back.

OP, you are being silly. I'll give you some tough love (homage to the episode of Will and Grace I saw today, no car ariels and I'll avoid the face).

13 years ago I was given the option, operation or die. As well as the miniscule risk of the anesthetic, I also faced the risk of potential neck down paralyisis.

it was scary, but it was a decision I had no problem making. I knew, because they told me, death by anaesthetic, or paralysis would be guarded against. A spine surgeon would be in the operating room to advise the team. And the chances of death by anaesthetic was vanishingly small, the anethetist wouldn't want to risk their reputation 😁.

have the op, have a nice sleep. I wish you well.

It's normal to.be apprehensive.

Thank you everyone for your replies. I know I'm being overly anxious about it, but it helps to know others have felt the same! And I'm so relieved to hear so many stories that everything has been fine.

Does anyone have any experience of abdominal surgery? Aside from fear of GA, I'm also very nervous about what happens after I wake up. I'm having a midline laparotomy, does anyone know how soon I'll be able to get up/walk around/go to the loo by myself? How does it work if you can't get out of bed - do you have a catheter or just call a nurse every time you need to go? I don't know how any of this works really, and it all feels so embarrassing. I'm likely to have vaginal bleeding after my op too, and I feel embarrassed about the nurses having to sort my pads out while I'm asleep or whatever. I know it's an everyday occurrence for nurses and no big deal to them, but to me it is.

Catheter's are great, you don't even know you're weeing! The nurses will know exactly what's going on and will deal with pads, etc without blinking. I had a hysterectomy and was bleeding slightly afterwards - the nurse was called Jesus which in my post anesthetic fug I found hilarious!

I had a a laparoscopy so not as invasive as yours! I woke up with a pad on and I bled for about 3 days but it was very light and I changed it myself in hospital (there’ll be supplies in the loos so no need to take your own). I think I just have been dosed up on plenty drugs because I wasn’t in pain afterwards, I just felt like I’d lost a lot of my core strength if that makes sense! I did wake up from my surgery with a lazy bladder so needed to wee but couldn’t wee, but they catheterised me and drained my bladder which was fine! My DP came for visiting hours once I came back to the ward and he walked me to the toilet quite easily. I was discharged the next day with plenty of painkillers and managed to get to and from the toilet myself, just with a bit of a hobble but probably best to have someone with you for the first few days of recovery and getting up from the sofa is a bit sore, but once I was up I was fine.

OP, are you me 🙈

I’ve got a similar operation in 10 days and I’m really scared of the GA. Completely understand how you feel, it’s the loss of control and ‘what if I don’t wake up’ that worries me too. Please update here when you can!

EVERYONE I’ve asked has said it really is fine, so I’m reassured by that. My manager was very sick after GA but that’s the only negative story I’ve heard so far.

I had a cancer removed from my nose, and my nose reconstructed with a graft from my forehead and ears. I was under GA fir 9 hours. Although I would have preferred not to have it, it was actually a good experience. A bit of light hearted chat while I was wired up with monitors, then I was out and woke up with my face bandaged up. I was kept in overnight and it was a very relaxing experience with all these people looking after me. You have all the pre op which is checking that your body can take the GA. So my advice would be don't worry, you will be in the hands of a professional team monitoring you every second, and enjoy the peace of recovery. In my case, I didn't have any pain. Even though I had 50 stitches in my face. It was remarkable .

When I was waiting to go into surgery (double mastectomy) the anesthasist came and had a chat with me telling me exactly what to expect. I found that reassuring and it was also nice to know who was who in the room. Not sure if that is standard as I am not in the UK but maybe ask if it’s possible.

Whatever they gave me for my GA was terrific. In recovery room I was all calm and warm and relaxed, and no pain (had to get broken finger realigned and pinned back into place). And the recovery room RN was sooooo nice, or perhaps it was the drugs.

Hope it all goes well.

You will be fine OP, of course you feel nervous. It’s an experience that is new to you. I was nervous too the first time I had to have GA, it was better than I thought, you go to sleep very quickly and then it’s just nothingness, until they wake you up in recovery. You wouldn’t know if you were asleep for 10 mins or 10 hrs. It’s a really strange experience but not unpleasant and as a pp said, relief that you have had the op. Good luck, it will be ok.

I felt the exact same @Daisythecat15. To the point where I was trying to convince the anaesthetist to remove my Gallbladder under some kind of general anaesthetic so that I could be awake 😂 Needless to say, he didn’t go for my suggestion and I had the GA 😂 He was lovely though and made jokes about how me dying on the table would definitely make him late home for dinner and his wife would be pissed so he’d be avoiding that scenario at all costs 😅

I was up and about within a few hours, although I remember feeling bruised and tender. The worst part for me was actually shoulder pain afterwards. They pump gas into your abdomen during the surgery and any that’s left in tends to sit under your diaphragm and for some reason it’s quite intense shoulder pain that it causes. They recommended peppermint tea to try and relieve it so maybe grab a box for when you’re home 😊
I had my surgery at 6pm and was discharged at 4.30am (😴) because they needed my bed 😅

If I recall correctly I had to call the nurse and used a bedpan for the first few times, then once the anaesthetic was out of my system I shuffled to the bathroom. I imagine as it's more invasive then you'll have a catheter and they are absolutely fine to use, had one whilst giving birth. The nurses know what they're doing, yes it's a bit embarrassing but I felt a long as I said thank you and appreciated their care of me then it was all good.

I do feel for you .I had a transhiatal esophagectomy ,take out part of esophagus ,remove bit of stomach and pull stomach up to form new esophagus, and of course was very anxious .
I found the most comforting thing was to resign myself and tell myself I had no choice .
With more complex surgery you do get very good care ,experienced and motivated nurses .
Pain was not an issue ,it was well controlled .But I did hallucinate a bit ,thought the angle poise lamps opposite were insects ,thought I'd woken up in the 1950s .I'm sorry ,that sounds really horrific ,but it really wasn't .It was as if I were seeing it all from a calm distance and I didn't feel anxious .
The catheter was fine ,they should only use it for a short time though .
The most embarrassing thing for me was passing small amounts of diarrhea when I passed wind .My advice would be to take some long Tena type pads as the major hospital I was in used large nappy type stuff .

And watch out for constipation ,both in hospital and when you get home .
You will get through it ,you will be quite removed from reality for the days you are in hospital .

Same here. Was in recovery what seemed a minute later.

This is normal OP, if someone had led me to the electric chair I’d’ve happily gone rather than to the theatre. I’d begin with the this is my last few weeks on earth thing as soon as my letter arrived from the hospital. I was such a nervous patient that they let me sit up, chat, & sing loudly before they put me out. After many surgeries I’m used to it now. Couldn’t you have the epidural so you’d be awake? You’ll be fine, I promise.

I think fear of GA is very primordial ,very deep rooted .And therefore ,unfortunately, very hard to escape or dissipate with logic or reasoning .
Very understandable.

I didn't consciously feel afraid but I unexpectedly cried for a week ahead of surgery. I think it's a response to feeling out of control. Just think of it as a chance to (briefly) experience the effects of class A drugs on the NHS. My anaesthetist and porter were amazing and really helped me. Mostly by being funny and sweet while I bawled.

Ahh sorry you're going through the same thing. I will update definitely. I don't care if I'm sick afterwards to be honest, just as long as I wake up!

Thank you for this. It helps to see it this way. Even though I know the chances of anything going wrong are so so tiny, I've probably got more chance being killed in a car accident on my way to the hospital, but it doesn't make me less scared.

One week to go. I'm struggling to think about anything other than the surgery at this point.

This was me last Wednesday at 7am but here I am. I was scared when they said the drug used to anaesthetise was fentanyl. That scared me.but I'm not an addict buying it in a park. I was given to me by the anaesthetist who told me "been doing this 18 years""
That helped. They knew I was nervous.
Weirdly I did have v low BP post surgery. So I'm glad that's it. I'm glad there aren't more procedures in the pipeline.