I have been subject to bullying from my sister for years. She’s aware of what she is doing and but is also master of appearing sweet and ‘who, me’ to everyone else. It’s classic DARVO and mind games every interaction. My parents agree it’s wrong but won’t confront it because they are worried of her blocking their relationship with their grandchildren. I think for far too long she has seen me as the weaker link but I can’t let that continue, because it’s not only draining me but would also be a really poor example to our children when they’re old enough to understand.
It’s often said on here to go no contact with relatives but IRL that would be hard. We are equally close to our parents and it would upset them to think we couldn’t do things as a bunch, like trips away Thanksgiving, Christmases and New Years together. I understand why. I also do think my sister is insecure and probably unhappy deep down - you sure would be to behave in the way she does. Because of this I guess turning my back on her entirely doesn’t sit right with me and I would love to be close again someday with her, but I definitely think reducing contact is healthier for me right now right back to seeing her once a year or less
AIBU to say enough is enough and not continue to be ‘the bigger person’ just because it’s easier for the rest of the family?