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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to desperately want there to be something wrong?

19 replies

ireallycantthinkofaname · 04/05/2023 22:20

I feel horribly guilty. I had a blood test today (after much struggling to get an appointment) after ages of crushing exhaustion, dizziness, muscle weakness and shakiness, fatigue, pins and needless, constipation, loss of coordination, brain fog/forgetfulness, random spontaneous joint and muscle aches that seem to come from nowhere. I've been struggling with depression so badly I wrote instructions for family members to care for my animals 'when I'm gone'.
Just desperately want there to be something fixable but feel f---ing awful for basically wanting something to be physically wrong with me. Hoping it's something like b12/folate I can just have an injection/take a supplement for. I'm scared they'll say 'hi actually your bloods are all good' because where will I go from there......? the surgery is so hard to get hold of this felt like my last hope

OP posts:
ChicChicChicChicChicken · 04/05/2023 22:23

Please get a copy of your results when they are ready because ‘normal’ is not the same as optimal.
You can have normal B12/ ferritin or whatever but be in the lower ranges of normal and still have awful symptoms. Sometimes you need to boost to the higher ranges of normal to feel well.

I hope something easily treatable shows up so you are soon feeling better. Flowers

TheSnowyOwl · 04/05/2023 22:24

I’m sorry you are feeling this way. Have autoimmune conditions been investigated?

moggerhanger · 04/05/2023 22:26

Have you had Covid? It sounds very like my Long Covid symptoms.

Jakc · 04/05/2023 22:26

How old are you? Could it be menopause? I’ve got every symptom you’ve listed and I think it’s menopause

Anabella321 · 04/05/2023 22:31

Don't feel guilty. It could be an overactive thyroid?

SeaToSki · 04/05/2023 22:33

Did they test you for parathyroid and thyroid hormones plus antibodies, iron, ferritin, vit d, magnesium, calcium and B12? Any and all of those can cause your symptoms. The pins and needles are classic parathyroid issues. Also second the PP who said get your actual results (look on the NhS app) and post them here. The vipers are v good at deciphering the results. If they didnt test all of that, consider MediChecks or another private lab service, sometimes GPs just dont order all of the tests

rcat74 · 04/05/2023 22:42

I agree it could be long covid and/or menopause. I felt like this a year ago and it was both. I hope you get the help you need.

Crinkle77 · 04/05/2023 22:46

It could be anything with those symptoms but I'm thinking possible Fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue or ME.

Boxbedbank · 04/05/2023 22:56

I don't think it's wrong to want something that's fixable. I definitely wanted something fixable. I didn't get it instead was diagnosed with cfs/me. To be told that there was no cure, that they didn't know if I'd get better was crushing. To be so ill I can't work, but nothing much I could do about it has been hard 9 years later I'm no better off (even after the pacing, vitamins, psychological support etc). So definitely can see how having something that's fixable can be better.
Also knowing is often better than the unknown, dc1 had 5 years of tests, me being fobbed off as neurotic ftm, when we finally got a diagnosis I cried with relief that we could actually help dc1.

Siameasy · 04/05/2023 23:05

It’s understandable to want that. I felt similar before I found out I was anaemic. I hope you get an answer

ConcernedCatmother · 04/05/2023 23:10

It sounds a lot like Lyme disease, worth looking into if you have exhausted all possibilities. I have Lyme disease & spent many weeks in hospital and virtually every patients symptom list is this xx All the best OP

SkaneTos · 04/05/2023 23:13

You want answers. That is not unreasonable.
I hope you will get the answers you need.

All the best to you, OP.

BatshitCrazyWoman · 04/05/2023 23:15

ChicChicChicChicChicken · 04/05/2023 22:23

Please get a copy of your results when they are ready because ‘normal’ is not the same as optimal.
You can have normal B12/ ferritin or whatever but be in the lower ranges of normal and still have awful symptoms. Sometimes you need to boost to the higher ranges of normal to feel well.

I hope something easily treatable shows up so you are soon feeling better. Flowers

I agree with this.

I had similar symptoms, plus muscle cramps, joint pain, palpitations and breathlessness, and also desperately wanted my blood tests to find something. And they did (overactive thyroid).

Flowers to you OP

Devonshiregal · 04/05/2023 23:27

Iron does this. And can be low but still fit the nhs “fine/ok” range. Ensure they check ferritin and iron stores not just haemaglobjn.

LittleEsme · 04/05/2023 23:31

ChicChicChicChicChicken · 04/05/2023 22:23

Please get a copy of your results when they are ready because ‘normal’ is not the same as optimal.
You can have normal B12/ ferritin or whatever but be in the lower ranges of normal and still have awful symptoms. Sometimes you need to boost to the higher ranges of normal to feel well.

I hope something easily treatable shows up so you are soon feeling better. Flowers

100% this.

Blarn · 04/05/2023 23:41

What treatment are you getting for your depression? I had very bad depression, along with stress and anxiety. I had all the things you listed. Antidepressants and working on my mental health made them better. Depression can cause very physical symptoms. I'm not saying there isn't something else wrong - but don't overlook that it could be related to your depression.

anon666 · 04/05/2023 23:43

May I ask how old you are?

I was exactly the same, lost the will to live completely. HRT made such a huge difference. I'm not perfect, I still get random aches and pains, I still get more tired than I used to, but I'm on the up!

ImSoShiney · 04/05/2023 23:58

Have you considered migraine? I get all of you describe during a migraine attack (and more). It's called aura and it can affect all of your senses, cognitive processes etc. It really is awful. It doesn't always lead to a headache either.

MsCactus · 05/05/2023 00:19

What are your exact symptoms?

There might be something physical, but I had very similar symptoms for a while and it was actually panic attacks. I didn't realise how anxious I was and it all came out in physical symptoms - mainly dizziness, feeling faint/exhausted and shakiness for me.

Anyway, I managed to treat it quite well with CBT & exposure therapy to the dizziness. Even if it's a mental health issue, it will be treatable!

Hope you get some relief soon

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