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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nail painting - great fun for both sexes?

44 replies

Bedofnail · 03/05/2023 17:53

School fete for the coronation on Friday, everyone very excited. Each class is in charge of a stall.

Only today DS (Y5) was told his class is doing…a nail painting stall. That’s it. He is so disappointed; along with many 9 / 10 year old boys he has never painted a nail in his life and has no interest.

AIBU to think this is pretty rubbish for the boys? The year group has a lot more girls than boys and it feels very much that things are geared towards their interests, eg the humanities topic last term was “fashion”.

YABU - All DC should embrace nail painting equally. Much more fun than throwing wet sponges at people etc.

YANBU - Nail painting is more girl oriented and some of the boys will feel excluded.

OP posts:
Thehollygrail · 03/05/2023 17:55

This is MN so all the boys will be embracing jubilee nails (with the requisite tutus) while the girls scorn it for rugby, but YANBU .

Gymimaslack · 03/05/2023 17:56

YABU, if your son feels excluded by painting someone else’s nails then I’d have a long hard look in the mirror

Eyewantobreakfree · 03/05/2023 17:56

It’s unfortunate but some boys do like their nails painted. My eldest son is 27 and still occasionally paints his nails. My youngest however would not be seen dead with nail polish 🤷‍♀️ Hopefully they will put on some boy oriented activities that he will enjoy 😊

Trez1510 · 03/05/2023 17:57

Who knows? He or one of his classmates may have a real talent for this and embark on a career in beauty as a result?

My partner has recently taken to buffing, filing and painting my nails. He's brilliant at it .... saving me a fortune on professional manicures!!!

You could get your son to practice on you!

Bloodsweatntears · 03/05/2023 17:58

My 10 year old boy would not be impressed.

PineappleLatte · 03/05/2023 17:59

Gymimaslack · 03/05/2023 17:56

YABU, if your son feels excluded by painting someone else’s nails then I’d have a long hard look in the mirror

WTF?!

OneFamily · 03/05/2023 17:59

What did you offer to help out with? Our school PTA are massively struggling to get any help be it time or donations but people moan about what they are doing all the time. It’s so frustrating. His is one class so I’m sure there will be other things he can do at the fete.

Sissynova · 03/05/2023 18:00

They’re working on the stall, not being forced to have their nails painted. Such a dramatic response over a non issue.
I’m sure he won’t grow a vagina because he paints a few nails for charity.

Comedycook · 03/05/2023 18:00

You'll get loads of posters coming on to say their sons love painting nails...but I agree with you op. My Ds would have hated this and had no interest in it. I think most of his friends would have felt the same. Temporary tattoos would have been more popular imo.

Original poster
Bedofnail · 03/05/2023 18:01

Gymimaslack · 03/05/2023 17:56

YABU, if your son feels excluded by painting someone else’s nails then I’d have a long hard look in the mirror

Why? I’d buy my DS a nail painting kit if he asked for one but (horror of horrors and I’m sure if I looked in a mirror it would crack)…he doesn’t want one.

OP posts:
Gtsr443 · 03/05/2023 18:02

Who wants a pissed off 10 year old boy doing their nails?

Florin · 03/05/2023 18:03

It seems a bit silly as some boys will be into it others will be absolutely no way. It would have made sense to do temporary tattoos as well, they do those at all our school fetes and both the boys and the girls go mad for them.

SwingandaPrayer · 03/05/2023 18:03

Eyewantobreakfree · 03/05/2023 17:56

It’s unfortunate but some boys do like their nails painted. My eldest son is 27 and still occasionally paints his nails. My youngest however would not be seen dead with nail polish 🤷‍♀️ Hopefully they will put on some boy oriented activities that he will enjoy 😊

Why is it unfortunate? Some boys might like it, some might not. Would you say it was unfortunate if some girls liked football or fixing cars?

Cantthinkofaname2203 · 03/05/2023 18:04

Thing is socially the boys aren’t going to want to do it. Publicly painting nails they’re going to worry about being called name.

it also puts social pressure on the girls. There will be girls who couldn’t give a shit about nail painting either, but they well feel they have to pretend to to fit in.

so yes, generally it’s an utterly crap idea for both the girls and boys.

Gymimaslack · 03/05/2023 18:06

PineappleLatte · 03/05/2023 17:59

WTF?!

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What’s so hard to understand? The only boys who would feel ‘excluded’ are the ones who’d refuse to participate, they would refuse on the most part due to harmful gender stereotypes perpetuated by their parents, or their peers and not mitigated by their parents

Soproudoflionesses · 03/05/2023 18:06

Gymimaslack · 03/05/2023 17:56

YABU, if your son feels excluded by painting someone else’s nails then I’d have a long hard look in the mirror

Eh???? Are you for real?!

Eyewantobreakfree · 03/05/2023 18:07

SwingandaPrayer · 03/05/2023 18:03

Why is it unfortunate? Some boys might like it, some might not. Would you say it was unfortunate if some girls liked football or fixing cars?

Show quote history

It’s unfortunate for boys or girls that don’t like certain activities. As I said in my post, I do have a son who likes nail painting. I also have two daughters; one who loves anything pink and girly and one that hates anything remotely girly. Each to their own and it’s their own preference what counts surely.

Gymimaslack · 03/05/2023 18:08

Bedofnail · 03/05/2023 18:01

Why? I’d buy my DS a nail painting kit if he asked for one but (horror of horrors and I’m sure if I looked in a mirror it would crack)…he doesn’t want one.

Show quote history

And?

this isn’t a ‘what he wants’ issue, he is being asked to paint nails, not get his own painted. I didn’t want a jar of sewing equipment but I still manned the jar stall at my school fete.

I think you need to grow up

neslop · 03/05/2023 18:17

Who is going to want their nails painted by a 10 year old who has no interest in it and has never done it before? Could you tactfully have a word with the class teacher and see if their class can offer a second activity alongside? Failing that, could your son and others who didn't want/didn't feel confident to paint nails be in charge of decorating the stall and taking the money?

IglesiasPiggl · 03/05/2023 18:18

I get where you're coming from OP. My DS is in a class heavily weighted to girls and in the final stages of primary school it's really beginning to piss him off that so much is geared to them because they form the majority of the class.
He is very much looking forward to starting at an all boys secondary in September. Anyway, back to the topic! They got the glitter and nails stall at the last fete and decided to just embrace it for the hour they did it - they did each other's nails in bright colours and had fun doing a few "customers" as well.

Gymimaslack · 03/05/2023 18:18

Gtsr443 · 03/05/2023 18:02

Who wants a pissed off 10 year old boy doing their nails?

Who would want a 10 year old doing their nails generally. You go to support the school and give money, most people don’t want the crap tombola prizes either

Original poster
Bedofnail · 03/05/2023 18:21

Gymimaslack · 03/05/2023 18:08

And?

this isn’t a ‘what he wants’ issue, he is being asked to paint nails, not get his own painted. I didn’t want a jar of sewing equipment but I still manned the jar stall at my school fete.

I think you need to grow up

Show quote history

I’m not sure it’s an issue of immaturity on my part. I manage to get by without randomly insulting strangers on the internet 😁

I think it is more that painted nails (rightly or wrongly) are worn predominantly by females. That is the association.

It creates a division and polarises the sexes at a school fete where, IMO, the activities should be generic and something everyone can do. And do without fear of being teased or laughed at for “looking like a girl”. Why not face painting or temporary tattoos?

OP posts:
Snowjokes · 03/05/2023 18:25

It’s a bit weird, are they expecting people (kids) to pay to have their nails painted? Is this a stall which goes down well? My 5 year old loves having his nails painted, but I think even he would recognise that it would be better to have it done by someone who has done it before!

Personally I’d avoid any class stall which is likely to be totally uninteresting to a large section of the class, whether that split is along gender lines or not.

universityhelp · 03/05/2023 18:27

It seems a funny idea for a whole class stall altogether, not only will most boys not be interested, but many of the girls won't be either, or not have good enough fine motor skills. Not very inclusive! Both sexes might like their nails being painted, though.

SwingandaPrayer · 03/05/2023 18:38

Eyewantobreakfree · 03/05/2023 18:07

It’s unfortunate for boys or girls that don’t like certain activities. As I said in my post, I do have a son who likes nail painting. I also have two daughters; one who loves anything pink and girly and one that hates anything remotely girly. Each to their own and it’s their own preference what counts surely.

Show quote history

sorry, I just misread the tone in the word unfortunate! I totally agree with you.