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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To find this colleague a bit annoying

246 replies

halfacupofjuice · 02/05/2023 23:15

Hello everyone,

I have been working at a particular company for a number of years and over the years things have changed but mostly have stayed the same. We have recently recruited a new person temporarily, as our previous colleague is off long term sick but will be back soon, but we are all finding her a bit... much...and I don't know if I should discuss this with her ( of course in a diplomatic way). Here are the reasons:

  1. She comes across that she doesn't know much about our field, but when you speak to her and talk about certain practices and policies, she knows ALOT but tends to die this down but only brings up her knowledge when I challenge her about her practice. The reason why I'm saying this is because I can tell that she is a keen learner but has been using some of her working days to go on training (to be far- only two) but she has just started with us. Also, she has recently asked the company to pay for a course that she would like to attend, we of course declined as we don't pay for trainings for temporary staff and plus there are a number of us in the office who are very specialist and have worked in the role for many of years with who she can seek advice and support from, so it's not an efficient way of using resources.
  1. In our company, we have been doing the same things, pretty much, for many years and then she comes in and has begun to ask us whether she can change some of our practices when working with clients.

3.She has only worked for a company for a month, but already she is speaking to similar companies to try and increase our own resources. This is amazing for our company, but I am finding her a bit much.

What should I do? Some of the colleagues feel that she is a bit much and should just take a seat back. How can I advise my new colleague?

OP posts:
YerAWizardHarry · 02/05/2023 23:40

You’ve said yourself things haven’t changed for years yet you’re claiming to be up to date enough in new/current practise or train or advise someone else?

halfacupofjuice · 02/05/2023 23:41

My point about the trainings is that there is no need fit her to go on them as she knows ALOT- more than she lets on and probably dies it down because she wants up to pay for the trainings.

OP posts:
halfacupofjuice · 02/05/2023 23:43

YerAWizardHarry · 02/05/2023 23:40

You’ve said yourself things haven’t changed for years yet you’re claiming to be up to date enough in new/current practise or train or advise someone else?

That's a very valid point and it all comes down to the lack of funds we have. We are slowly making changes but it is the way it is now due to the lack of funding. Her ideas are great but it will be a stretch considering our finite resources.

OP posts:
Drywhitefruitycidergin · 02/05/2023 23:47

She just sounds keen to make a good impression, learn & be pro-active.
Maybe you should be looking for a way to channel her enthusiasm into something mutually beneficial.
I genuinely don't believe that in any organisation there is nothing that needs changing.

You sound like someone I worked with when I was in a temp job after uni who was utterly aghast when I asked one of the insurance brokers if there was something I could do to support them in between taking calls since my only job was to write down who called & who I put them through to for the whole day. Or when I suggested putting the info on computer instead of pen & paper....

bookwormcrazy · 02/05/2023 23:49

I think it sounds like she is progressive, proactive and wants to do well, and like most people when they join a new company, wants to make a difference. That is normal, but it also sounds like you are all resistant to change and like things the way it's always been done.
I am sure with the comments behind her back and lack of willing to try new things will dampen her spirits soon and hopefully she will get a job where she is appreciated.

NeatCompactSleeper · 02/05/2023 23:49

She sounds like a breath of fresh air in a stagnant room.

Your company should hold onto her, although I'm sure she's destined for bigger and better things.

But to answer your question "What should I do?"

My advice is to take note and learn from her.

Changeforachange · 02/05/2023 23:49

Someone's come to you keen, hungry to learn & with some - to use your words - great ideas.

Your reaction is 'how can I shut her down'?

I'd reflect on that, I think.

You don't always need more resource to work smarter, she might rise to the task of coming up with some ideas with that criteria, if you worked with her.

Fandabedodgy · 02/05/2023 23:53

NeatCompactSleeper · 02/05/2023 23:49

She sounds like a breath of fresh air in a stagnant room.

Your company should hold onto her, although I'm sure she's destined for bigger and better things.

But to answer your question "What should I do?"

My advice is to take note and learn from her.

Completely agree with this.

She sounds great.

OP sounds like she has gone as far as she in own own career.

WhiteCatmas · 02/05/2023 23:55

Usually when a colleague irritates me so much it means that they bring something to the table I don’t.
She is out there, looking to improve your company and its practices, find new ways of doing things.
Listen to her.

Deathbyfluffy · 02/05/2023 23:58

halfacupofjuice · 02/05/2023 23:43

That's a very valid point and it all comes down to the lack of funds we have. We are slowly making changes but it is the way it is now due to the lack of funding. Her ideas are great but it will be a stretch considering our finite resources.

Perhaps the business would have more funding if you had more staff like her who are willing to into the world and change things for the better?

Sorry, but it sounds like company (and staff) are stuck in their ways, and she has genuinely good ideas about moving things forward.
Laziness and stubbornness are the issue, and I’m not talking about the new starter!

Allthenaughtydogs · 03/05/2023 00:13

This reads like a reverse to me. Some companies are very set in their ways and hate change, even if that change is beneficial to them…….

UnicornsHaveDadsToo · 03/05/2023 00:16

I believe that when you first join a company, you should take a bit of a back seat, see how things are run properly and then implement your views.

If you're someone with experience and knowledge, no you shouldn't, you need to shake things up, look at things from a new perspective, bring fresh ideas, and wake up automatons dribbling at their desks.

I wasn't the one who created the job ad so I have no idea [if it specified an original thinker, or for someone innovative, or creative]

But...

I am her line manager

Now, say what?! You don't know what the job ad specified for your direct report?? This would be a clear dereliction of duty, a manager who reports to me would be lucky not to find themselves on a performance improvement plan if they uttered this.

Your methods and practices haven't changed for years. Someone new with fresh ideas is frowned upon. No clue about direct report's job ad, so what about the person spec? No consideration given to new ideas to improve ways of working. No evidence of a culture of continuous improvement.

That's my vision of hell, and I've been in some genuinely nightmare-ish work situations.

mainsfed · 03/05/2023 00:21

she knows ALOT but tends to die this down but only brings up her knowledge when I challenge her about her practice

Why do you challenge her?

Sounds like she has hit the ground running, she would be an asset in progressive companies.

Luredbyapomegranate · 03/05/2023 00:29

You do sound threatened by her OP. And it’s possible your systems are not as good as you think and she has a point.

If she’s actually telling staff to do things contrary to your systems and you don’t want that, then tell her not to.

If you don’t pay for temp staff training, tell her so, and where she can get advice.

Do not express your opinion that she is a bit much or should take a back seat, there is no point, and I think your superiors may. Not agree.

Blablablanamechangagain · 03/05/2023 00:30

Hahaha.

I've fairly recently started a new job where things hadn't changed for years and years and needed a shake up.

I have been given a promotion and a payrise since starting, and personally thanked by the director for bringing fresh ideas and wanting to improve the company. Ideas and suggestions have been welcomed and supported by most, results have been seen, and I'm being given the opportunity for a funded specialist degree.

I am now even more grateful for the above than I was before. Where you work sounds utterly hideous.

pastypirate · 03/05/2023 00:37

I'm not surprised she wants to go on the training what with all the knowledge guarding going on from the perm staff!

MrsMikeDrop · 03/05/2023 00:39

halfacupofjuice · 02/05/2023 23:21

@Mangotango39

I can understand how that can come across. But there is nothing wrong with the way we run things currently and it has worked for the team, and the company, for many years.

So you think, I fund it hard to believe that you can be doing the same thing for years and are still doing "best pratice". It's strange to not evolve and adapt. I'd say as she's new she can see lots of room for inorgemnet and you are all threatened by this

Fairowing · 03/05/2023 00:43

She is temporary, don’t spoil her enthusiasm when she can take it to a new employer. No offence Op but are you a similar age to your team (30s to mid 40s perhaps?) and your idea of break time convo is thrashing out your colleagues quirks?
I agree with other posters it’s sounds like you don’t like change and innovation. Just because you’re all experts who have done it this way since day dot doesn’t mean you’re right and the whole industry should pause and replicate you.

SD1978 · 03/05/2023 00:44

So you wanted a sheep to maintain the status quo, and despite all her suggestions/ requests being reasonable- you don't like it.........none of what you e said seems u reasonable. Just because a practise has been maintained for years, doesn't mean it's still good standard now- and probably isn't.....

Confusion101 · 03/05/2023 01:37

In my line of work she would be most definitely made permanent!

People hate change so any new person suggesting new ideas is going to annoy current staff, even if suggestions being made will benefit staff in the long run. I find it a bit unprofessional for them to pass comment to you. "I'm getting a bit tired of her" is bitchy and not at all constructive criticism!

Maybe next time just put "hiring a yes man.... No people with initative need apply"!

MavisMcMinty · 03/05/2023 01:49

Another thing to note is that new eyes see very clearly, while long established workers stop noticing things, everything becomes comfortable background. You’re taking her suggestions as personal criticism.

lauraisa · 03/05/2023 02:45

Is this a reverse?

New colleague sounds great!

PotatoScollop · 03/05/2023 04:08

I actually agree with the OP.

It tends to get everyones back up on a team when someone comes in, and immediately, before they've even worked there a week/month, tries to implement changes.

It usually gets peoples backs up, because often there's a reason things are done the way they are, not necessarily because 'they've always been done this way', but because it has proven results, compared with other tried and tested methods.

Not saying don't listen to her suggestions, I'm all ears for them, but having experienced this, the ideas usually won't work, and the person doesn't understand how/why because they haven't 'taken a back seat at first' to learn the new workplace, methods, functions, and why things have been done the way they are, before forming opinions about it, or solutions to problems (hat usually don't exist).

I usually find this a form of ball swinging when people come into a new workplace and try to do this with no actual idea.

If her ideas are good however, and would solve problems, then it may be the case you are a bit jealous, if you're honest.

Inthesamesinkingboat · 03/05/2023 04:33

It sounds to me like she has taken a temporary role because that’s what was available but she really wants something permanent so is trying to appear keen and show her value.

it sounds like you and the rest of the team are threatened by both her work ethic and knowledge and would much rather she just keep her head down as to not show you all up.

god I feel sorry for her.

Thirdsummerofourdiscontent · 03/05/2023 04:37

I assume she is trying to gain experience and pad her cv if this is a temporary role - that’s what I would be doing. It’s easy to remain enthusiastic and motivated when you have a goal to work towards and a end date.