To not sort it out or seek advice

[Amicrazyorwhat23]

I’m 42 and have no desire at all for sex. This has been the case for the last 3 years or so.. My friends say I’m wrong and should sort it out and get some help from the GP or counselling or my man will leave me. I do have something gynae related going on and just fed up and embarrassed by the lack of sex drive. I don’t want to speak to anyone about it. No GP or anyone. Aibu to my partner. My friends think I should be keeping my man happy.

Well, I don’t think it’s more that you should sort it out because you owe your partner sex but also on their side you’ve just completely shut down an entire - big - side of a relationship and they get no say in it which doesn’t seem fair or very happy, unless they’re on the same page as you.

Sex or no sex, why wouldn’t you see the doctor about a gynae issue? Seems self-destructive. What if it’s cancer?

What does he think? That's more important than your friends.

I’m waiting for surgery. Not sure if yeh 2 issues are related. It’s not cancer had bloods and numerous mri’s. I’m embarrassed to speak to him about it. It’s affecting my mental health but scared to talk to anyone because it’s knocked my confidence and self esteem

It's not their business. Why tell them? It's private. Try to speak to your OH about it though. Maybe you'll feel differently once you've had your surgery.

Oh I misunderstood you then. I’m glad you are getting medical care. I’d tell husband that while this is going on you just don’t have the headspace for sex.
Id ask GP about a therapist or get private therapy- often work can offer employee assistance quickly and for free- it’s understandable as many people struggle mental health wise when dealing with distressing physical health conditions.

You don't owe anyone sex , but if sex is important to him then he could choose to leave and rightly so.

Are there any other forms of intimacy in your relationship?