To find this strange? MIL & my mother behaviour

[ILoveCakeLikeTheToriesLoveRippingTaxPayersOff]

NC for this.

My MIL visits most days, it used to be every day till I put a stop to that. She's okay, but can be a major drama llama over small things. She does have a relationship with DC but I wouldn't say she's hands on at all.

My mum I don't see very often maybe once or twice a year due to distance, me and my mum are really close and she's very hands on with dc.
She'll do crafts, legos, bake, take them on trips etc, all hands on grand parents stuff they love it.
I was supposed to see my mum last month and go to hers with dc but one of my dc ended up in hospital with diabetes so the visit was cancelled and dc were gutted as was I.

My mums coming up tomorrow for a week, which is great. She's coming to learn how to look after dc diabetes partially to help me when I go down to hers to visit or if she has to do any emergency childcare in the future. (I've had a few stints where I've ended up in hospital out of the blue and other family refuse to babysit.)

Mil wasn't happy about this, said my mum moddly -cuddles dc. She doesn't she's just hands on with him and enjoys spending time with him doing kids stuff as she doesn't get the opportunity often. She's great with kids.
And said why would my mum want the responsibility of looking after dc diabetes she wouldn't want that on her head.

AIBU to find this behaviour a bit bizarre? I'm fine with her not wanting to look after dc, but to be annoyed about one of my family members wanting to do it seems like I can't win.

It’s weird she comes over all the time but isn’t that close to them and wouldn’t ever help you if you needed it. And then that she can’t fathom someone else acting differently, or rather she can, but needs to dismiss it so she doesn’t feel bad about her lack of support.
what I’d find more annoying though is that she thinks she can comment and critique my mother to me.

She's jealous of your mum and thinks that the grandkids will love her more because she actually does stuff with them. MIL thinks her frequent presence is enough.

Maybe your Mil feels a bit put out by your mum being so involved and feels a bit guilty she doesn't help as much (no reason to feel guilty in my opinion GP should be involved however much they want or not).

I would ignore what she says and just focus on what sounds like a good relationship you have with your mum and that she has with your kids.

Next time you Mil says anything about mollycoddling just ignore it and change the subject.

Yes I've always found it weird she's happy to come round, she used to watch them for a hour if we had to pop food shopping but she refuses to do even that now due to not wanting the responsibility. I think she was always looking for an excuse and now she has it.
Yes I'm not happy her criticising my mother either, my mum has never done anything towards her and always tried to get on with her but she seems to be funny about her visiting. She wanted to slag her off but we changed the subject and she kept saying comments "I'm talking about her mother." And DH said "we're not talking about her mother she hasn't done anything wrong."
She has form for doing this about people.

She sounds really jealous. How embarrassing for her that she's jealous of someone who sees the DCs less often than she does.

Dc love them equally, and have always made this known. I've never pushed his mother out when mine is here, I just find it odd she gets defensive when my mum makes the very rare visit (she would visit more but sadly DGP require her to help them as they're quite elderly so has to get my uncle to help while she's away.) it's not like she's here all the time.

YANBU

Ignore MIL and enjoy your visit with your mum. It’s none of her business nor should she be making such comments.