Aibu or is dh

[Monkeynuts57]

I went out for an hour and dh made formula for our dc who is just five months old she is bf but has the occasional bottle on a night usually so I can get a break
but I went out he said she was screaming so he made some formula but because she was screaming and it wasn’t cooling down enough he added one oz tap water and another scoop of formula
I’m angry as I don’t think this is safe and he’s not making it as it says. he’s in a mood for “being told off” as he puts it and has walked off saying he’s not in the wrong!

One ounce of tap water won't do your baby any harm.

The water is fine, it's the adding it formula to cold water that is the issue. The formula is the source of upset tummies, not the water.

We used to have a few sterile single-serving cartons of ready-made so ‘panics’ didn’t have to happen. Also handy if any ‘it was all different in my day’ mavericks had to do a feed. Doubt it’ll hurt LO at five months but maybe DH needs to calm down and learn the rules rather than just doing whatever runs up his humph then going in a mood cos he fucked it🤣

I get where your coming from but I wouldn’t make a big deal of it and just in future make sure he uses cooled boiled water

Water from a "safe source" is fine. The boiling water is needed to kill any bacteria in the powder.
Read the WHO guidance.

At 5 months tap water is fine. The way he did it is the same idea as the perfect prep machine. Hot shot with the formula then top up with cold 🤷🏼‍♀️

As others have said it should be fine at 5 months. In getting angry at him, all he's now learned is be careful of telling you everything lest he incur your wrath. If he had not told you, you would be none the wiser.

It's not the correct way to do it but I'm assuming no harm has been done. He probably panicked as your little one was upset and needed feeding quickly.

We keep a strerile bottled of previously boiled but cooled water for making bottles.
Just mix the powder with 1oz of boiling hot water to kill the bacteria in the formula and then top up with the cool water. It is then the perfect temp for baby.

This.

I think YABU. Not ideal but it’s not water out of a puddle, is it?

When things have calmed down, perhaps talk about calming strategies that you know work when your baby is screaming.

It's fine. He initially added boiling water so that would have killed any bacteria in the formula powder. Topping up with cold water is fine.

I think I'd be like 'oooh don't do that again darling' but wouldn't be particularly worried this time around xx

Woah did no one read in the OP that he added another scoop of formula powder to it with the cold tap water?! That's incredibly unsafe, formula powder needs boiling water as it is not sterile. It's very dangerous to make it up incorrectly. Show him the NHS advice on making up formula, reiterate that we all make mistakes but he MUST learn from it.

He added another scoop straight into the bottle so it would have hit hot water. He them added 1 extra oz of cold. Formula doesn't need boiling water, just hot water. And the chance of the formula having anything needing sterilising isn't 100% anyway, its just an extra precaution in case.

Honestly cannot understand the pqnic from the OP

Yes we all read it, but we are just keeping it in proportion.

He added the cold tap water and then another scoop of the formula
it’s not recommended to make it up this way

thankfully my baby seems fine
but I’m not happy he did this, the guidance is there for a reason and I wouldn’t want my baby to be poorly
thanks for the suggestion i think the ready made ones are a good idea for emergencies I’m going to make sure we get some in.

I do think your over reacting a bit

I get you’re irritated but you’ve said ‘my baby’ twice in your new post. Any chance you DP is feeling like he can’t do right for wrong?

My first was born in 2000. You used boiled water and could let it cool for a certain length of time but if I remember rightly only up to 30 minutes, no longer.

The UK is in the minority in recommending that you mix hot water with the formula. I used to buy distilled water by the gallon in the US precisely to avoid the faff of boiling it and my French SIL used Evian! Tap water will be ok for a 5MO too, she’s almost at weaning age and then you can just give them tap water in their sippy cup. I totally get why you want to follow the guidelines and not saying you shouldn’t continue to do so at all, but as a one off I wouldn’t be worried because it’s what they do routinely in other countries.

However, if formula is only given occasionally then going forwards I would just get ready made in, it’s so much easier especially if you’re not in a formula feeding routine that would allow you to precisely time bottles.

As said, keep cooled boiled water in a sealed sterile bottle and use that to cool formula quickly. At five minute baths it's fine to keep it for a couple of hours. Most people are making tea/coffee and you just replace it.