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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Seaside living

64 replies

Moonandme123 · 26/04/2023 17:23

A job opportunity has come up for me about 1 hour from where I live. Dream job! It’s by the seaside in an area we know well as we lived there many years ago. Problem is DH has reservations because:
He doesn’t want to take our two primary aged children out of their current school.
He worries about the problems with some seaside towns eg street drinkers etc. this wasn’t an issue when we last lived there as we didn’t have DC.

I want to accept this job and move there. DH works exclusively remotely. My parents also live near where we would move to which would be nice for DC.

AIBU to even consider removing DC? Is living next to the sea with children nice? When we lived there before we would go to the beach most days even for just a de stress after work. Now we have DC we visit the beach every weekend but I’m aware that living there might be different.

OP posts:
chocolatehoovering · 26/04/2023 18:18

I lived in Whitley Bay for years and loved it.
It's calmed down now but when I first moved there there was an issue with stag parties and drinking and people pissing in the streets. However that was mainly in the evenings and weekends. Once in 10 years I saw a naked stag cling-filmed to a lamp-post in the middle of the day.
Plenty of beaches to enjoy and things to do during the day.
I didn't live in the centre but half an hour walk from the beach and it was really quiet.
I wouldn't let any concerns about drinkers put you off because you'll be home with the children by the time that potentially becomes an issue. I think it's lovely for children to grow up near the sea. I really miss it.

Saschka · 26/04/2023 18:19

Oh Worthing is totally fine. You can live a bit further out of town in Storrington or Angmering if he is really worried about the town centre.

GoodChat · 26/04/2023 18:21

Can't you commute?
He doesn't want to move so you can't just uproot a family.

Why did you move initially?

dudsville · 26/04/2023 18:23

The sea, and seaside living, isn't one thing. There are small quiet towns, major cities, ports...

Nordicrain · 26/04/2023 18:23

I'd love to live by the sea. Worthing is alright isn't it? I would go for it.

GettingStuffed · 26/04/2023 18:27

We used to live in a seaside town but we rarely went to the beach. It was too much hassle getting 3 young children sorted.

The funny thing is that we're considering moving back there as a compromise as DH wants to be the cricket, and I want to be near my dad as he's getting on a bit. If we move to the seaside town I can get a train band be there in a couple of hours.

ifancyajamdonut · 26/04/2023 18:41

We live on the Isle of Wight near the sea, it's fab and our grown up dc and dgc love to visit. So much to see and do the tourists can be a mixed bunch but at least they seem to enjoy themselves before going home again.
Love living here.

Original poster
Moonandme123 · 26/04/2023 18:43

We didn’t want to leave initially. The landlord decided to sell and we couldn’t find a property quick enough so we explored other areas. I got offered a job where we now live and so we moved. We now live in the village where DH’s parents are. However after a falling out, we barely have any contact with them even though we could walk to their house in thirty seconds. I have double checked that DH doesn’t want to stay here for them but he is adamant he doesn’t have hardly any contact and would rather be near to my parents as they treat him so nicely and he considers my dad a friend.

OP posts:
mackthepony · 26/04/2023 18:43

Sounds

mackthepony · 26/04/2023 18:43

Oops

Sounds idyllic

Favouritefruits · 26/04/2023 18:46

I live by the sea and it’s amazing in the summer, after school trips to the beach, every sunny day of the school summer holidays building big sandcastles and swimming in the sea! It’s not great in the winter as the wind off the sea is terrible but it will mean the winters aren’t as cold. I’d go for it!

Crikeyalmighty · 26/04/2023 18:47

You know the area OP, you like it - so just go for it- my son moved primary 3 times!!

Willmafrockfit · 26/04/2023 18:51

i am certain worthing has good schools

justprance · 26/04/2023 18:52

I would move to the seaside in a heartbeat

GoodChat · 26/04/2023 19:03

Moonandme123 · 26/04/2023 18:43

We didn’t want to leave initially. The landlord decided to sell and we couldn’t find a property quick enough so we explored other areas. I got offered a job where we now live and so we moved. We now live in the village where DH’s parents are. However after a falling out, we barely have any contact with them even though we could walk to their house in thirty seconds. I have double checked that DH doesn’t want to stay here for them but he is adamant he doesn’t have hardly any contact and would rather be near to my parents as they treat him so nicely and he considers my dad a friend.

If he'd rather be by your family why doesn't he want to move? Other than school, it makes no sense.

Besthaveanamechange · 26/04/2023 19:07

Worthing is lovely. Unless you want to leave, in which case you’re fucked by the A27

Hubblebubble · 26/04/2023 19:12

I love mine. I try not to think about the killing I could make if I lived in London or a commuter zone.

mamabear715 · 26/04/2023 19:14

Go! I lived by the sea for 13 years & the services were better than in a city..

RoseMartha · 26/04/2023 19:16

Worthing is ok, I would live there and have lived there in the past, or you could go slightly down the coast to goring or east preston. Dependant on housing prices etc.

ThisNameIsNotAvailable · 26/04/2023 19:19

I don’t know the area but I would move to the seaside tomorrow if there was any way I could.

gotmychristmasmiracle · 26/04/2023 19:35

Yeah you need to give location, if you said Blackpool I would say defo don't do it!

LulooLemon · 26/04/2023 19:41

It's Worthing.

GoodChat · 26/04/2023 19:42

gotmychristmasmiracle · 26/04/2023 19:35

Yeah you need to give location, if you said Blackpool I would say defo don't do it!

She said Worthing

Loocheeyar · 26/04/2023 19:48

I would love to live by the sea ! But my two children need specialist schools for their asd so i don’t think it would work for us . But their quality of life would be better .

loislovesstewie · 26/04/2023 19:58

I live 5 minutes from the beach in Yorkshire. Lots of amusements, very busy in summer, plenty of takeaways (sorry), despite having lots of bars near me it's no noisier than the city where I used to live. No bigger problems with drugs or nuisance, or anti social behaviour. I'm very happy here.

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