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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect good manners…

26 replies

Justaflippertyjibbet · 26/04/2023 16:17

I didn’t send an adult GC a birthday present this year because I never receive an acknowledgment. GC has never even sent me a birthday card and doesn’t send cards at Christmas.
GC queried not receiving a gift this year and was told the reason why.
The reply from GC reads “ I don’t send thank you messages to anyone else for anything. No one else I know has an issue with it, I certainly don’t expect a thank you message for anything.”

OP posts:
SooninBrisbane · 26/04/2023 16:22

GC sounds like a rude entitled brat and wouldn't be getting any gifts going forward

MiIIiee · 26/04/2023 16:23

To have queried why she never got a present is so cheeky.

To not give because you don't receive from a grandchild is probably a bit childish, but quite within your rights to do. You should at least receive a thank you text at the least. If she can't even say thank you she doesn't deserve a present.

stayathomer · 26/04/2023 16:26

id hope they queried it because they were worried it was lost in the post or something, otherwise is so cheeky, but only giving if you get a nice thank you or something back seems as bad tbh.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 26/04/2023 16:28

They’ve got the time to query why they haven’t got a present but not to send a thank you? That’s so cheeky!

WhatWouldHopperDo · 26/04/2023 16:32

Not sending any acknowledgment of any gift is rude. Not being bothered to at least call your grandparent to thank them for a gift is spectacularly rude and entitled.

I don't blame you for not sending anything and I would not feel bad about it.

PollyPeptide · 26/04/2023 16:36

If they never thank anyone for gifts, they're a very rude individual and I don't know why anyone would ever buy them a gift.

Greydogs123 · 26/04/2023 16:44

There are multiple ways in this day and age to send a very quick thank you to someone for a gift. Not to do so is just totally rude and I would also not send anything in future, other than a card.

thaisweetchill · 26/04/2023 16:58

The fact they queried it shows how cheeky they are! I wouldn't be sending any presents in the future, they sound like an entitled brat!

RicherThanYews · 26/04/2023 17:01

I would have stopped too tbh. I'm curious, do you give them the gifts in person or are they posted/sent via the parent? I ask because the least they could do in person is say thank you for the lovely gift.

cocksstrideintheevening · 26/04/2023 17:01

Cards havent been a thing in my circle for years. I always text / call / fb my Granny / anyone important to me though and always a thank you.

Your GC is rude as fuck for querying.

MrBit · 26/04/2023 17:04

Good for you for making a stand, bloody rude of them
Have you replied ?

NoSquirrels · 26/04/2023 17:05

Well, you both know where you stand, eh?

iklboo · 26/04/2023 17:12

Asking 'where is my present? Makes them sound about six years old They'd never be getting anything off me again.

Mrsherdwick · 26/04/2023 17:41

Your gc is very rude.

Cam22 · 26/04/2023 17:43

What an immature brat. The entitlement. Grrrr

Gtsr443 · 26/04/2023 17:44

No thank you, no gift. Sod 'em.

Hbh17 · 26/04/2023 17:45

They are incredibly rude. No more presents for them. Ever.

Cam22 · 26/04/2023 17:46

Justaflippertyjibbet · 26/04/2023 16:17

I didn’t send an adult GC a birthday present this year because I never receive an acknowledgment. GC has never even sent me a birthday card and doesn’t send cards at Christmas.
GC queried not receiving a gift this year and was told the reason why.
The reply from GC reads “ I don’t send thank you messages to anyone else for anything. No one else I know has an issue with it, I certainly don’t expect a thank you message for anything.”

“I certainly don’t expect a thank you message for anything.”

I presume because he doesn’t send anyone cards or gifts. I am assuming the GC is male?

Mojoj · 26/04/2023 17:47

stayathomer · 26/04/2023 16:26

id hope they queried it because they were worried it was lost in the post or something, otherwise is so cheeky, but only giving if you get a nice thank you or something back seems as bad tbh.

Actually it's perfectly acceptable to stop sending gifts if the recipient can't be bothered saying thank you. She sounds like an ill mannered brat.

Crazycrazylady · 26/04/2023 17:47

Wow , they're a real charmer aren't they!

purpleme12 · 26/04/2023 17:49

Bloody hell.
Is he embarrassed he's caught out or something?!
I just can't believe the response!!

JulieHoney · 26/04/2023 17:52

Do you mean you never get thank you cards, or that they don’t even text a thank you message?

Thank you cards - and increasingly Christmas and birthday cards - are pretty much dying out, especially from younger people. I wouldn’t expect to receive one from an adult grandchild. Cards are not part of that generation’s social norms.

But if your GC never texts or WhatsApp a thank you message, nor mentions it when on the phone then they are ignorant and ungrateful.

ComeTheFuckOnBridgett · 26/04/2023 17:54

He sounds like a brat. Don't send anything ever again.

Cam22 · 26/04/2023 17:54

The cheek of him to query the absence.

determinedtomakethiswork · 26/04/2023 18:53

She never thanks anyone and wonders why the gifts dry up?

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