Feel awkward disciplining in front of my parents

[Justwantsometimeslone]

Dd is 4 and going through a very wilful age, she doesn’t listen and shouts and sometimes hits, it’s really hard at times, although she isn’t always like this.
Parents have come to visit for a few days and behaviour hasn’t been great. I just feel so uncomfortable and stressed with my parents sat there and Dd acting up. I feel paranoid I’m being judged..either for being too soft or too strict/harsh.
Dd was a nightmare to get to sleep last night and started shouted and hitting, so I was cross with her, she went into the spare room where my mum is and told her she didn’t want to go back in and I was mean ti her, ffs, it’s so difficult. Also I’m sure my mum listens in next door as she moved away quickly when Dd came running into the room.
Does anyone else feel like this?

Anyone?

I don’t feel awkward telling my kids off in front of anyone. What do your parents do that makes you uncomfortable?
My mum will usually back me up if the kids are playing up and often I’m more strict when people are around as I don’t want that behaviour in front of people

No, not at all. What’s your relationship like with your parents. Do you always feel
judged and disapproved of by them?

I totally understand. It's partly that I know my DM has quite high standards and I always want my DS to behave well (so that it reflects well on me). I do try to acknowledge that it's my issues though and ensure that I'm consistent in my parenting of DS.

Well your daughter can surely feel how uncomfortable you are and is probably playing up to that.

Ignore who is there and discipline as you normally would.
You need to be consistent no matter who is there.

I used to feel like this around my dad when he was alive with DD1 who was a total live wire bull in a China shop strong willed sort of toddler!

I always felt he was silently judging our actions and decisions.
I think alot of it was his ideas around how children should be brought up/behave were very different to ours....he was very old fashioned, strict and traditional and also generally a very uptight person at times about things.

@Mummyof287 I feel a bit like this as she’s a real strong live wire and never stops. They’re often more fussy in telling her not to do this and that, about things that I’d probably let go as I’d rather tackle the big stuff and not just get at her all day long.

Kicking,hitting clearly unacceptable behaviour and tbh if it's at that stage you clearly aren't disciplining very well long before your parents came along. Ours are under 2 and they already know that is not right behaviour so at 4 your daughter should really know. Same for bed routines etc. We have family members stay often and still stick to what we do with our 4 no problems as they already know whats acceptable and what isn't, what's routine and what isn't.