To think that DP has just ruined his "chances" for any loving tonight

[lucyellensmum]

I'm really hurt actually. I HAVE put on a lot of weight recently, well not recently, im a big girl end of story, but i was much slimmer when i met dp. But ladies, he is Mr fecking Michelin man personified! BUT, i love him the way he is, i wouldnt chage a thing about him.

Tonight we are putting DD to bed and she is playing up, i think, because he just lets her do as she pleases, totally undermines me etc (but that is a different thread). So anyway, ive not been well (tummy bug) but have felt better today - he says to me earlier, ooh, you oing to have a nice bath tonight then? Woohooo i think, im on a promise. So, DD playing up, we both getting stressed but cant let it show obviously, I'm laying on the bed with my jeans undone - he says, my god, you are so FAT!! with emphasis on the fat - he often jokes about it, and to be fair i often joke about his lard arse but only in response to his comments. Bed time ends up with DD having full melt down, tantrum, biting, screaming and kicking ME - "i dont love mummy, i dont love mummy" So he takes over - despite my wanting to sit it out, as he can never get her to settle but now she wants him, so basically means, after a six month battle to establish a nighttime routine, in three nights flat (i wasnt well enough to settle her the other night so it started then) we are back to square one.

So, i think fuck it, let him deal with it, im going to have a bath - i go to wake him, hes fallen asleep and i think i should wake him else he wont sleep later - he tells me he loves me and then wonders why i just answer "ok"!!

One of my problems is i cant let go of an argument, but i actually want to give him both barrels tonight. How fucking DARE he say that to me and then expect me to just forget it. So now he is snoring upstairs like a fucking rhino and im starting to feel guilty for sulking.

I am on ADs, my counsellor says i have serious self esteem issues and should not keep running myself down - um, i wonder why???

Saying ALL of this, DP is wonderful and i adore him, he has stuck by me through thick and thin, but sometimes he can be such a thoughtless fuckwit!!

You should give it to him with both barrels. That was an extremely cruel and thoughtless thing to say to you - especially if he is big himself.

life's too short - let it go

oh dear, sending you a and sympathy. Your relationship sounds a lot like ours.

Is it possible the ADs are partly responsible for your weight. They are well known for it, especially the SSRI type ones. Could you change your prescription.

Agree, make him do all the lurving tonight and enjoy.

Raise the issue re comments about being fat another time when you are not angry and not on a promise

My DH (of 30 years!) always says the same thing just before we go on holiday.

'Dont you think you should try to loose some weight before we go away'

It used to make me very sad but I now say

'When you grow some hair over your bald patch I will loose some weight.

PML Shabster!!!!!!

I say to my dh - so what if I'm fat at least I can lose weight, you'll always be ugly. Still hurts though.

He just said sorry, well said he didnt mean it - so, do i sulk (with the potential to ruin the weekend, but will get my point across) or do i obey my hormones and make him pay!!

I could be champion comfort eater - I think they should make that an olympic event - I would get a gold medal for it.

When I look at my baldy old man (who acts and thinks like a 70 yr old at times) I think 'how come I am staying 17 in my head and wont ever stop laughing and acting like a daft cow.'

Ive got much bolder since I turned 50 - at the risk of sounding like the Nan in Katherine Tate - I AM WHAT I AM, I AM MY OWN SPECIAL CREATION.

def make him pay!

why would you want to spoil the weekend?
stop sulking - have a cuddle up!!

Vintage, i did it, i swallowed my pride, oh and some of the rose that DD brought round for me from her and her DPs romantic valentines meal. Went and gave him a cuddle, when he can actually wake himself up, i might be in for some loving, but something tells me he is going to have to hurry, the wine is fine