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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to stop DH from pissing all over a managers car at my work?

24 replies

Tortington · 15/02/2008 21:04

i am ill and have been for over a week. Today i drove from 16 miles west of brighton to an office we have in the thames gateway region of london. i set off at just past 7am

when i get there, i am faced with a security guard - (he likes to think he is important - but spends the time in between talking to people watching a mini tv) "you can't park there" says he.
"where can i park?" says i
cue sucky lip noises"weeeelllll you could park in the directors space....buuuuut he might not be happy"
"i'll take my chances" says i in between coughing my fucking RING up and crossing my legs becuase i have no pelvic floor and i just might piss in the lobby

i put car in space.

thats only the beginning!

an average regional manager starts making noises regarding parking so i ask whether its me who is in his spot.after a brief chat we agree it is me.

i am still coughing up my lower intestine - my nose has sores on - my face swollen through my sinusitis.

he directs me to a car park through a one way system unknown to me - but in actualy fact in only 2 mins away. he then tells me he is leaving in about 2 hours - but then so was i

he walks into lift before me, walks out before me, opens door and walks through before me - i then am faced with a v. peculiar scene.

he parked his car at the side of mine - blocking everything and everyone.

all this time i am coughing and spluttering.

when i find my way to carpark the 2 hour fee is......£1

i know if i was in his position - knowing the area, seeing a collegue dying of a cold - i wudda said " never mind please bare it in mind next time - but i'll nip round to car park"

i think this guy was a complete arse - no manners nd no consideration.

its a close call so i know some will disagree - but i am v. ill - and i couldnt miss my meeting.

anyway - told dh and he offered to piss all over his car.

i was tempted but the drive is too long

OP posts:
hecate · 15/02/2008 21:07

Post a pot of it and ask if he'd mind tipping it over himself.

Elasticwoman · 15/02/2008 21:07

Time for dh to respond to one of those willy-lengthening ads?

If you are unwell you should be off sick, in bed, before you become the most indispensable person in the graveyard.

hecate · 15/02/2008 21:08

Oh, that's tipping it over the car himself, not tipping it over himself.

Although...........

notnowbernard · 15/02/2008 21:09

Don't know about a piss...

I'd get him to save up a shit instead!

Tortington · 15/02/2008 21:10

i am likingthe debauched way in which this thread is going

OP posts:
Tortington · 15/02/2008 21:10

i am likingthe debauched way in which this thread is going

OP posts:
hecate · 15/02/2008 21:13

I know. There's something oddly satisfying about the mental image of a man crouched on the bonnet of some knob's car, having a good old crap and then wiping his arse with the full length of the windscreen wipers.

Am I getting too into this revenge fantasy?

Elasticwoman · 15/02/2008 21:15

custardo are you getting tipsy on the Benylin?

DoodleToYou · 15/02/2008 21:18

Message withdrawn

KerryMum · 15/02/2008 21:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsCarrot · 15/02/2008 21:21

I know someone who pressed a dog turd in the door handle of a car that had nipped in the space they were about to park in.

soopermum1 · 15/02/2008 21:32

what a prick. obviously the carpark space makes him feel important/ if he needs that to make him feel important he's a very sad individual indeed. tosser

ineedapoo · 15/02/2008 21:37

just snot on his car

Tortington · 15/02/2008 21:51

see i knew you were all reasonable people.

i love you.

i shall remember the dog shit retribution

OP posts:
Dropdeadfred · 15/02/2008 21:54

Dog turd in the petrol tank?

The word wanker etched in superglue onto his windscreen?

AlistairSim · 15/02/2008 22:06

I feel dreadfully sorry for the poor man.

He clearly has genitals that require an electron microscope to see.

You are cruel harridans.

Tortington · 15/02/2008 22:07

i'm liking the venom

OP posts:
Dropdeadfred · 15/02/2008 22:13

I'm liking your DH's basic instincts!

Triathlete · 16/02/2008 00:15

You'll get well again, but that manager will always be an insecure, obnoxious, socially retarded little pillock.

That's revenge enough, don't you think?

PillockOfTheCommunity · 16/02/2008 00:19

did someone take my name in vain?

unknownrebelbang · 16/02/2008 00:23

Custy, why aren't you off sick?

unknownrebelbang · 16/02/2008 00:23

oh yeah, the manager is an arse.

Tortington · 17/02/2008 06:56

bitterness from triathlete there - love it

i couldnt miss this mtg URG - plus it was a friday they would have thought i was taking the piss and not believed me

OP posts:
kiskidee · 17/02/2008 07:20

your dh loves you truly custy.

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