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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think she’s taking the mickey?

24 replies

Happybakers · 21/04/2023 19:59

Not sure if iabu or not and would welcome your opinion. I have changed a few details to protect anonymity.

Person A works in a bakery baking cakes. She’s been suffering with MH issues and has needed time off (fully understand and support that).

She has started to come back to the Bakery on a phased return (again no issue with this) but she’s spending the time she’s not at the bakery while on her phased return to run her own bakery classes (while still being paid in full!).

The rest of us are picking up the slack that her absence has created and it’s created more work for the team.

AIBU to think that if you’re unable to fulfill your full time role, you shouldn’t be running your own bakery classes when you should be at work.

HR are reluctant to get involved as they don’t want to be seem to be discriminatory to her MH issues.

AIBU to think she’s taking the mick to be unable to do her job but effectively run her own business on the side? Hmm

OP posts:
Original poster
Happybakers · 22/04/2023 07:41

Thanks to all those who have voted so far!

OP posts:
Ponoka7 · 22/04/2023 07:50

HR won't get involved, so you need to let it go. If the team can't cope, then you take that to the manager/HR. People will agree with you, but it isn't going to help.

Mamapiggywig · 22/04/2023 07:54

the whole team should go off with depression, having had to cover extra work.

moonspiral · 22/04/2023 07:54

I am surprised HR are allowing her to have a second job. A lot of places don't. But if its gone to HR there's nothing that can be done.

moonspiral · 22/04/2023 07:55

I also assume she has a doctors fit not stating a phased return is required.

nomoredriving · 22/04/2023 07:56

Lots of contracts say you can't take a second job unless agreed, does her contract state this?

rookiemere · 22/04/2023 07:57

YANBU, but I doubt the voting will go that way.

All you can do is work only what you are paid to do, and refuse to do overtime or pick up extra tasks.

It is possible that working in the bakery exacerbates her MH in a way that teaching doesn't, but in that case she needs to pick the other profession. Presumably she is still collecting her ft salary from the bakery.

JMSA · 22/04/2023 08:04

A total pisstake!

ZekeZeke · 22/04/2023 08:10

I hope she is paying tax on this second source of income.
Totl pisstske but it's up to HR to manage.

ZekeZeke · 22/04/2023 08:11

If its a voluntary non paid class she is running then that's different.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 22/04/2023 08:15

She has basically made her fit note invalid.

Why will HR not get involved? This is their job!

Yes, she is taking the piss.

moonspiral · 22/04/2023 08:17

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 22/04/2023 08:15

She has basically made her fit note invalid.

Why will HR not get involved? This is their job!

Yes, she is taking the piss.

No she hasn't. It depends on exactly what it says and why her job isn't suitable but her class might be.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 22/04/2023 08:17

@ZekeZeke

If its a voluntary non paid class she is running then that's different.

Totally disagree. The whole point of a phased return to work is that you take your time, don't get too stressed or too tired or overdo things. Whether or not this is volunteer work or for private profit is sort of irrelevant.

If she can do those hours volunteering (while being paid by someone else) then she should return to work.

ZekeZeke · 22/04/2023 08:23

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 22/04/2023 08:17

@ZekeZeke

If its a voluntary non paid class she is running then that's different.

Totally disagree. The whole point of a phased return to work is that you take your time, don't get too stressed or too tired or overdo things. Whether or not this is volunteer work or for private profit is sort of irrelevant.

If she can do those hours volunteering (while being paid by someone else) then she should return to work.

Because volunteering could be helping her mental health, no pressure as apposed to a work environment. And if its unpaid there are no conflicts of interest.

GrannyAchingsShepherdsHut · 22/04/2023 08:23

It depends what her fit note says, which HR will have seen, and is probably why they don't want to get involved.

If it says she's not able to return full time to her post baking cakes at cakey mccakeface bakery, and needs a phased return for xyz. Then she can do whatever she likes outside the bakery.

If it just says she's unable to bake full time, then she's on dodgy ground. But in that case I'd expect HR to be all over it.

I was off sick for mental health reasons, directly related to the people I was working with. Working with different people would have been fine, and my fit note reflected that.

Original poster
Happybakers · 22/04/2023 08:35

To those asking if it’s voluntary, no it’s not, she’s charging people to attend her baking classes (and splashing it all over social media!)

OP posts:
Nimbostratus100 · 22/04/2023 08:43

it depends on the fit note. I'm off sick from teaching. I am well able to do private tuition, and am doing so. The school is fully aware, as is my GP, all above board

TheHoover · 22/04/2023 08:50

agree with pp that HR need to get a grip on this.

You should really have an open discussion about her health and how work can affect her condition so she can be supported in the workplace. And part of this discussion can be about how she maintains good health outside work - the second job is relevant if stress and burnout is an issue but it may not be (eg if her mental health is triggered by issues affecting your workplace). You are definitely fine to ask but don’t make assumptions - if you believe she is taking the piss and it comes across through your questioning you could land yourself in trouble.

Rosula · 22/04/2023 08:52

HR should ask for permission for a discussion with her GP, where they can ask whether the GP knows about the second job and why she can do that but not her normal job.

Blinky21 · 22/04/2023 09:03

Maybe doing her own thing is helping her recovery, MH issues can be extremely complex, not really for others to judge

drpet49 · 22/04/2023 09:04

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 22/04/2023 08:15

She has basically made her fit note invalid.

Why will HR not get involved? This is their job!

Yes, she is taking the piss.

This.

ZekeZeke · 22/04/2023 09:18

Happybakers · 22/04/2023 08:35

To those asking if it’s voluntary, no it’s not, she’s charging people to attend her baking classes (and splashing it all over social media!)

Total piss take.
Point the tax man her way

NowZeusHasLainWithLeda · 22/04/2023 10:18

Taking the piss. Rules about this depend though on the type of job I imagine. I'm a teacher.
Our school has us sign a disclaimer at the beginning of each academic year covering stuff like tutoring for example .Absolutely not allowed when off sick (as well as obviously not being allowed to tutor any student on the roll even if not our own students, or members of their families)

Original poster
Happybakers · 22/04/2023 13:53

I’m not sure how she could justify it to HR as she’s also teaching baking classes at the bakery. Only difference is her own ones are on a smaller scale. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Also, HR are not on site, we have a number to them that we can call (I think the bakery buy in their services).

OP posts:
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