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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to ask how much you wash your hands everyday

85 replies

notevensure12 · 19/04/2023 19:19

Not even sure if this is the right place for this but here goes - I've had ocd mainly fixated on contamination for the last decade. Had countless treatments and I've completely lost sight of what other people would actually consider to even be "normal" at this point.

I'm washing my hands around 4-5 times an hour, with piping hot water until it feels like they're clean enough. I can't touch dirty laundry, bins, rubbish, clean up, without having a load of handwashing rituals that follow it.

So - what's normal?

OP posts:
Suzi888 · 19/04/2023 21:26

Any time I want to prepare food, eat, use the toilet, touch something dirty. I always wash my hands when I come in the house.
I carry sanitiser too. I wouldn’t say I’m OCD, just more aware of germs.

BCBird · 19/04/2023 21:27

Before eating,after the toilet. If I emptied the bins I would wash them.too

ranty · 19/04/2023 21:35

I'm sorry you feel this way because I do too, after having my daughter I also developed contamination OCD and wash my hands after touching everything. Even if I accidentally touch the sink straight after I wash my hands again. I have to use a steroid cream because I've destroyed the skin :( have you tried any meds? I'm currently on venlafaxine.

lljkk · 19/04/2023 21:42

Not very much... post toilet, raw meat, after cleaning something truly yucky, or if obvious something is on them. Plenty of those are really just waving a hand under cold water.

What bad thing do you think will happen, OP, if you didn't wash your hands frequently? Given that people like me are mingers, why do you reckon that bad thing hasn't happened to us?

carriedout · 19/04/2023 21:44

I wash my hands:
-After the loo
-Before cooking or eating and then afterwards
-When I return home after being out, arrive at a destination or when I arrive at work after public transport
-After doing a dirty job e.g. emptying bins
-When I have a cold and am sneezing etc

If you wrote a list of when you will wash your hands, can you ignore the feelings telling you to do it more often - how difficult is that to do?

carriedout · 19/04/2023 21:45

how difficult is that to do? - didn't mean this to sound like it should of course be easy - just that some people with OCD can ignore the desire and some can not, so I meant 'is this possible for you?'

Chickenwing2 · 19/04/2023 21:46
  • when i use the toilet
  • before preparing food
  • before eating food
  • while cooking (constantly)
  • whenever i get home or arrive at work
  • whenever ive touched something sticky, dirty or if ive touched something outside.
  • At work i clean my hands all the time if ive touched anything

My DH is a germaphobe and has passed this to me a bit

Bbq1 · 19/04/2023 21:47

After the toilet. I wash my hands on work a couple of times if I've got cause to. I usually wash them when I get in from work.

Kanaloa · 19/04/2023 21:49

After I use the toilet or change a nappy at work. Also when I cook or make food. That’s about it really. I think it sounds like you’re struggling a bit, your hands must be sore washing them 5 times an hour. Is there any help you can access? Is anything stressful going on and you might be projecting it onto the hand washing?

mondaytosunday · 19/04/2023 21:50

I'd say about four times or more a day. After I get home from walking the dogs, after I use the toilet and a couple times while cooking.

Tessisme · 19/04/2023 21:51

I wash mine a lot. But I had OCD as a teenager, so I think I still have residual issues around hand washing all these years later. I wash my hands

  • after using the toilet
  • before and during cooking - touching meat/cracking eggs etc
  • before I eat
  • when I come home from anywhere
  • after cleaning around the house
  • after touching the lid of the food bin
  • after lifting/sorting dirty laundry
  • if I have been out in the garden/shed/summerhouse
  • multiple times at my mum's, as I am her main carer
  • sometimes when specifically asked to by DS, who has OCD (but only if he is watching! We're trying to muddle along until his CBT starts)
  • when I, or anyone I'm looking after, isn't well - multiple times

My hands are dry and sometimes bleed, but I honestly don't have the irresistible compulsion to wash them I had back then and I don't panic if I can't wash them. It's more habit now. Although I do think my reasons are important!

Songbird54321 · 19/04/2023 21:51

I wash my hands after using the toilet, after changing my dd's nappy, before prepping food and then after touching certain foods (raw chicken, fish, chilli etc). Then if they're obviously dirty, such as putting air in the tyres when there's muck on the tyre cap but that's not that often. Maybe 7/8 times a day on average.

DizzyHelp · 19/04/2023 21:54

I will accept that I'm OTT with hygiene. But I do think 4-5 an hour sounds excessive.

I wash mine when I get in from being out. When I arrive at work.

After the toilet.

Before I cook/eat.

After touching something gross or an animal that isn't one of my own pets.

WandaWonder · 19/04/2023 22:07

HighInfidelity · 19/04/2023 19:25

I wash my hands after using the toilet, if I’ve touched something that has made my hands visibly dirty or if I’ve touched raw meat while I’m cooking. The last two don’t happen everyday so most days the number of times I wash my hands is the same number of times I go to the toilet. Are you getting any treatment at the minute for your OCD?

Yes I do it about the same as this

Woodywoodpeckerharrison · 19/04/2023 22:11

Ontopofthesunset · 19/04/2023 19:35

I'm probably a bit like you, OP. I wash my hands after emptying bins, before preparing food, after touching raw meat or fish, after putting dirty laundry in the washing machine, and of course after the loo. I don't really have rituals about the washing, though I know I am excessive about my hand hygiene. If I have touched something I think is really unclean I will 'feel' the uncleanness of my hand until I can wash it.

This is me too. Probably a bit too much but not an issue that interrupts life. Can't stand touching door handles or shaking peoples hands etc but I'll still do it if I have to (but will then think about when I can wash my hands).

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 19/04/2023 22:14

After the loo

Before food prep / bins

After handling raw meat

After coming in firm being outside of the home.

After gardening

I use a bar of soap and warm water.

Shannith · 19/04/2023 22:15

AlltheFs · 19/04/2023 20:28

Not as much as I should, I’m always guilty of coming in from the stables and making a sandwich before realising my hands are awful.

On an office day I’d say probably 4-6 times total. On a home day with DD I do mine more, as I help her with the toilet.

Basically after the toilet and generally before cooking but I’m a bit lax with that if just cooking for me. Otherwise only when they are dirty. I cleaned the bins out the other day and did wash my hands after that as the bins were grim. But that’s about as bothered as I get.

I am the absolute opposite to having germ OCD though. I like a bit of dirt and almost never get bugs.

Phew. Was debating if I should post what a scumbag I am. Horse girls in general I think tend to have a high tolerance. I eat at the yard without washing my hands all the time.

I've only had food poisoning 4 times in over 40 years. All traceable back to things like a dodgey oyster/Thailand - not from having dirty hands.

Wishitsnows · 19/04/2023 22:17

Maybe 5 times a day. Also I doubt I wash my hands for as long as you do. It’s just a quick drop of soap and a couple of seconds under the tap. Never really get I’ll either.

Bunnichick · 19/04/2023 22:26

I wash my hands maybe more than average but not as much as you. In a morning getting ready I would wash my hands after the loo, but also before putting anything on my face, after brushing teeth, before contact lenses, after feeding pets, after changing baby nappy, after touching dirty laundry, after touching keys or anything outdoors, when I come in the house, when I first arrive at work. I wash them quite a few times mostly when getting ready as I would do them 4-5 times in an hour then but only as I'm touching my face and stuff otherwise it wouldn't even be very hour...

Bunnichick · 19/04/2023 22:27

Also after touching the bin (indoor bin) or eating anything like crisps

Bunnichick · 19/04/2023 22:27

i feel like that too @Ontopofthesunset

TwoMonthsOff · 19/04/2023 22:30

Too many as mine are cracked and bleeding at the knuckles 😢

beeskipa · 19/04/2023 22:39

After I've done skincare in the morning and night - 2
After the toilet - 3-4?
Usually once after cleaning kitchen or putting things in dishwasher etc - 1

So 6-7 times a day. I don't after, say, going to the supermarket or whatever, although I can see why you would. If I'm ever in London for work I always wash my hands after going on the tube, it FEELS dirty!

So I'd say that was pretty excessive, but you already know that. I sympathise - my mum has contamination OCD and it's a really hard thing to live with.

BurbageBrook · 19/04/2023 22:45

After the loo only. And obviously before cooking for others and after chopping raw meat. It's terrible for your microbiome and general immunity to wash hands too often.

Wynston · 19/04/2023 22:50

Way to many times but much less than I used to.
My ocd in pregnancy was pretty intense.
Many goes at cbt therapy didn't really help unfortunately. I know what I was supposed to do but couldn't implement it the way it needed to be done.
The best money I ever spent money on was emdr therapy.
I wish you well op its utterly exhausting and the continuous intrusive thoughts are so hard. All we want is a peaceful mind.....at the moment mine is much quieter xxx

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