To think allergy mum is OTT

[Boogiewoogieanddance]

I genuinely don't know if I am or not, this is a genuine question as I thankfully haven't got any experience in having a child with serious allergies. I am, of course, happy to do what I can to prevent a reaction.

There is a child in my DDs class who is allergic to a list of things so we aren't allowed them in pack lunches. That's fine, I have no issue as I know kids can be careless and gross about their food hygiene. My issue is with the nuts, literally anything that says "may contain nuts" or "may contain traces of peanuts" is not allowed... if the occasional time I don't realise and send something (These are not nut flavoured things or anything with nuts in the ingredients, but I assume are just made in the same factory as nuts.) it is sent home unwrapped and she hasn't been allowed to eat it.

But is it really possible that an allergy can be so served that something that may contain nuts could cause a reaction if opened in the same room.

Many thanks!

So explain the logic of the schools point 'we will not allow you to bring in items made in a commercial premises labelled' may contain nuts' BUT we arent going to tell you please dont give your child peanut butter or crunchy nut cornflakes for breakfast'??????
Logically the child having consumed nuts that morning IS a risk to a child with an airborne allergy but its not being asked of parents, and this policy goes against usual medical advice, so please explain it to me, I am clearly as stupid as the OP

Yes it is, if your child was at risk of dying every time they left the house you'd be OTT too hon

I agree. It gives a false sense of security.

Also, i'm interested why those in favour of banning even may contain nuts won't engage with my posts pointing out that many children are severely allergic to things like milk, yet no school is going to ban products that *actually " contain milk (despite the tragic death of Karanbir Cheema)

Why the hypocrisy?

Banning products actively containing nuts is fairly managable in a school, although there will be slip-ups, so it can't be guaranteed.

Banning "may contain nuts" is totally disproportionate on risk vs practicality. I could send in a "nut free" product, only for the outer packaging to be contaminated by being stored in the same cupboard as my pistachios. With younger children, they could easily go in contaminated by their breakfasts with traces still present on their hands/ faces/ clothes. School age children often go to clubs with others who won't know of the allergy because there's no food on-site so could be exposed that way.

"May contain" is an arse-covering disclaimer that serves to eliminate the chance of a food producer being sued rather than the actual indication of risk.

DS had multiple food allergies, and the first time he ate a product containing cows milk, his face swelled like Harry Potter and a stinging jinx. It was a couple of days before he could open his eyes again. I remember going to a toddler group where some idiot was letting her toddler roam around shedding great clumps of cake all over the floor and toys and watching DS hawk-like to make sure he didn't pick any up and and tripple-contaminate himself with a full house of allergens. I know the fear of young children and common allergens well (and the fear that it could be worse next time) but you can not restrict the community down to "may contain" level, and often it's unfeasable for people with the allergies to restrict themselves that heavily too because so much food is labelled this way.

As the parent of a child with a nut allergy this double standard drives me insane. I'm on a few allergy groups and some parents really do have completely unrealistic expectations. Occasionally I've pointed out that they probably think nothing of giving their kid an ice-cream in a public place but I genuinely don't think they see it.

Was going to add this! M&S have changed 'May contain' to 'not suitable for nut allergy sufferers' on almost every item. We take a cautious approach and has been fine so far. We risk 'may contain' but M&S make me feel like a bad parent!

So people with a serious bread allergy should spend their entire lives in hospital and never be allowed to leave?

Was going to add this! M&S have changed 'May contain' to 'not suitable for nut allergy sufferers' on almost every item. We take a cautious approach and has been fine so far. We risk 'may contain' but M&S make me feel like a bad parent!

But in this case it's not about the person who actually has the allergy, it's about school asking everyone else to avoid the items with a warning too. But are fine with them having peanut butter for breakfast.

I'm increasingly coming round to the point of view that this is the wrong way to be handling allergies. Rather than just banning stuff, coming up with some sort of way of getting through to kids why they shouldn't share foods, must wash their hands, zero tolerance on throwing food etc etc.

I literally couldn't afford to buy expensive brands of anything.

Our school is so picky with what they allow anyway due to all the healthy eating stuff, I've found a good compromise with supermarket brand things, if they were to then say that I couldn't send that in due to the 'may contain nuts' I don't know what I would do.

If there's an allergy that severe then the school should be providing that class snack imo.

That said, there are also many kids with sensory issues at school who will only eat a very limited amount of things, what's supposed to happen if those things have 'may contain nuts' on the label.

It's a very tough one to try and balance the needs of everyone.

May contain nuts, Not suitable for nut allergy sufferers, May contain traces of nuts, May also contain nuts, Produced in a factory which handles nuts and all other alibi labelling statements aren’t legally defined. In products from the same line, M&S might say ‘not suitable for someone with a nut allergy’ and Tesco might say ‘May contain traces of nuts’ but the risk is the same. It’s just depends on how the brand owner wants to phrase it, rather than each phrase having subtle differences in meaning. I wouldn’t read too much into the phrasing of allergen alibi labelling.

I am exactly the same, have anaphylaxis/airborne etc, when I was younger I never ate anything with may contain, my mum and dad always drilled it into me to read every label, I remember years ago aldis own brand ketchup had may contain nuts!, as I've gotten older it's a risk I now take and eat things with may contain, as you said it's company's covering there arse/laziness on there part most of the time.

*That said, there are also many kids with sensory issues at school who will only eat a very limited amount of things, what's supposed to happen if those things have 'may contain nuts' on the label.

It's a very tough one to try and balance the needs of everyone.*

I agree. I have two children with multiple severe allergies (all of which, with the exception of nuts, children are freely allowed to bring into school), and two with sensory issues around food as a result of autism meaning their diet is very limited.

I think banning "may contain nuts" products is unfair for so many reasons. It's hypocritical when there will be cheese and egg and soya and wheat (etc) all over the lunch room, yet these can all cause Anaphylaxis too. And it's unfair because it imposes so much restriction on children without thinking what their needs are.

Plus it's meaningless because as everyone has said, do you ban home made food? Do you ban children eating nuts at breakfast? So it creates a false sense of security

Or in your view - should I stop eating all bakery products?

I'm literally NOT interested in carrying the mental load of stranger's illnesses.I have my own shit to deal with & a nut allergic child.
There are reasonable adaptations and those crossing the line. This crosses the line.

Whereas someone staying in hospital their whole life is totally reasonable, right?

Yes, the child could die if u don’t follow the rules.

As mum to a DC with a severe nut allergy resulting in anaphylaxis and possibly death without their epipen, yes, it can be that dangerous.

"Completely ridiculous and goes against anaphylaxis UK advice....no school should be nut free, it gives a false sense of security!"

This. Trying to claim a setting is "nut free" is in fact dangerous and goes against the most recent allergy guidance. Schools really should not be doing this, its a vague attempt to avoid taking responsibility for practising allergy safe behaviours and being prepared to respond if a child has a reaction.

This could just as easily be the school misunderstanding what they need to do as the parents of the child imposing the rule.
However, as any food made in anyone’s kitchen may contain traces then possibly the child should eat separately from the other children, if this is a genuine risk.
You might get somewhere with gentle questioning.
Btw is she a single mum, or are we all just assuming that only mums care about and arrange this kind of thing?

Sounds necessary rather than reasonable.

It's also daft (to put mildly) to imagine that the "rules" are workable or even make sense. As I already mentioned - reminds me of the bloody Covid terror.

I could probably exterminate the whole population single handedly. I went out twice! Without a dog! And I eat so much nutty granola that I practically sweat nuts!

And stay away from vegans - they are riddled! They want to save baby cows but go around killing children. Was always suspicious of their activities anyway... Feckers. 😂

I was in paediatric allergy clinic last week and kids were eating in the play area - despite signs not to.
When I mentioned it to the doctor she said well there are other clinics going on and parents complain if we ask kids not to snack!!!
In an allergy & scratch test clinic!

@bossonext

Seriously though, it is a sad thing that someone is so ill but trying to control the food choices to a minute detail of everyone you'd ever share space with is unworkable and so not the best way to go about it.
An immune-compromised person wouldn't go on a tube train. Or should everyone else be disallowed to get on?

I had an anaphylactic shock about a year ago. I'm very careful and had no idea what I'd done 'wrong'.

I ended up be blue lighted to A&E because I'd had a cup of coffee. Very odd as I'm nut allergic not coffee allergic.

My DD turns Detective and finally discovers that the barista had made a customer an almond milk coffee and only swilled the jug out then made my coffee.

So @Boogiewoogieanddance the mum isn't over reacting.

I don't think your situation is comparable.

@StopGo those milk frothing spouts cannot be cleaned properly without taking the machine apart. Even with a clean jug you can be contaminated. To be allergy safe you would need a separate steam wand for each variant of milk. Then we get onto dishwashers, have you see the colour of the water coming out of them?

@StopGo a comparable situation would be stopping anyone in your vicinity from having a coffee in case you reacted to them having one. Nuts isn't it?!?!