to expect dh to arrange childcare while I am working away?

[DrNortherner]

I am away with work next tues and weds. Weds is dh's day off so he was doing scool runs in my place.

He now rings to tell me his work are short staffed and need him to do overtime on weds - an early shift starting at 7am. I say - you can't do that shift as you are taking ds to school. So dh expects me to cal his mum to see if she can come to ours for 7am in the morning.

I say - do it yourself and he thinks i am being unreasonable. Am i?

If I understand correctly - your DH usually does the school runs on Wednesdays unless he is otherwise occupied at work, when you would do them?

I think it really doesn't matter who organises the childcare - both of your normal arrangements have fallen through. Who normally talks to his mother when she is asked to do emergency childcare - you or him?

He can't make a call to his own mum?

For that alone, YANBU.

His mum's a bit of a star if she does it - or is she an early riser anyway?

I think he should sort it out as your working arrangements were in place before his. He ought to have remembered that he had to do the school run before agreeing to do an early shift.

You're in the stronger position anyway, as you will not be there on Wednesday morning, whereas he will.

His mum will probably have to stay overnight won't she? If his shift starts at 7am he must have to be up and out by 6am-ish.

I normally do the school run on a weds. Dh gets 1 weds in 4 off - next weds happens to be his weds off, which workd out well as I am away overnight tues and not back till Weds eve.

I would normally call dh's mum if I could not make school run.

As my plans have been made for months and sh has known about them, I am annoyed that he has said he will work an early shift, knowing he needs to take ds to school. It's his day off, they have asked him to help out and I think he should say that he can, but as his wift is away he needs to satrt a little bit later.

Or, if he chooses to do it - he should arrange child care to cover him.

OK, so the most usual scenario is - you take DS to school on Wednesdays and if you can't you ask your DH's mother to do emergency childcare?

Make that phone call to his mother - be grown up and organised, not petty .

Were you both at work when the conversation took place? If so is it possible he thought it was easier for you to get in touch with his mum quickly so the childcare got sorted out before she made other plans?

Tbh it seems like a tiff over nothing - unless he's always leaving everything up to you and you're starting to get a bit fed up with it.

He needs to sort it out.

Let him do it - you won't be there. It is not you that needs help that morning but him.

YANBU.

Does it really matter who calls his Mum? Seems to me you are both being petty.

if Weds was your DH's day to be having responsibility for the school run and now something has come up that means he can't do it, he should sort out childcare - agree with Gomez - this is to help him, you won't even be there, thus his responsibility.