Both my DP and I really enjoy going out for food, we always look forward to it and it’s a pretty big part of our socialising. For his birthday I had booked a table at a restaurant that’s always been on his list of places to visit. It’s pretty expensive but I thought why not, if you know you want to do things or experience in things in life what’s the point of waiting around for a day that might never come? So I booked it and said I’d like to take him as a birthday treat.
He was initially pleased but then felt that it would be too much for me to spend and that he didn’t feel comfortable with that level of expense (I was estimating it to come to about £500.) I also really wanted to go to this restaurant but understood that if he felt uncomfortable, it wouldn’t be enjoyable. We jointly came up with a list of about 10 alternatives, then shortlisted and booked a different restaurant, more special than our average places but not in the realm of initial treat restaurant.
Two days before his birthday he said he’d been reading some reviews of the place that said it had gone downhill recently and changed his mind. Not an issue, let’s go back to the shortlist and choose something else. He then chose a different place, somewhere he’s always said doesn’t appeal to him, I felt neutral to it but didn’t think it was particularly special, based on a recommendation of a friend. I felt a bit miffed, he has certain friends who he will follow their lead completely and be a bit of a sheep to, and it felt like I’d put a lot of thought and energy into planning arrangements that were ultimately futile. His birthday though, so his choice.
During the meal, between the starters and the main course I excused myself to go to the bathroom, when I returned he was having a conversation with the waiter about an issue with his meal (he thought he’d been given the wrong cut of steak) we continued with the meal, both enjoyed the food and went back to the local pub to catch up with some friends for birthday drinks.
This is where my issue is. While in the pub he proceeded to tap away at his phone for some 15/20 minutes, writing a review of the restaurant. I suggested he leave it for the day. I also suggested he write the review and then keep it in his notes, to sleep on it and then post it tomorrow if he felt he needed to. But he didn’t, and a meal we both enjoyed he ended up leaving a 2 star review for.
Would you be offended if your partner left a 2 star review of your birthday gift to him?? Or am I being sensitive to feel a bit put out, that he’s not directly criticising me etc.
Lord, sorry for the length of this! I wasn’t expecting such a convoluted epic.