Me and my ex split up around 3 years ago and have a child together.
The relationship was on and off for 2 years. He used to ridicule me, call me names and pressure me into things I didn't want to/or was ready to do. He was manipulative towards my eldest child and used to scold and blame for alot of things. He would punch, kick and throw things when he didn't get his own way. On one occasion he threw a heavy toy pram across the room narrowly missing our newborn baby who was laying on the bed at the time. He used to hate me going out without him and didn't like me spending time with a friend. He was disrespectful towards my parents. Amongst other things.
He threatened to kill himself if I broke up with him, told me that noone else would want to be with me and he didn't want anything to do with our child.
Things finally came to ahead and the police got involved and shortly after my exes mum asked if they could be involved in my child's life which I agreed to despite all the nasty things they said to me and accused me of. No effort was made to stay in contact, which was also blamed on me because apparently it was my job to make the arrangements. My ex was nasty towards me and continued to argue about the past so I stopped contact with him as it isn't appropriate.
I recently messaged him to ask if he would like to be a part of his daughter's life which he ignored but got his mum to answer for him and they saw her once last month and once this month (their choice). On both occasions he looked uniterested in his daughter. He made no effort to interact with her he didn't talk to her at all and stood chatting to his mum.
I also recently asked if he could help in some he accused me of just wanting money and using her as a "transaction" and that "he shouldn't have to pay to see his child" (which he doesn't, he hasn't paid a single penny since she was born). He said that me "asking for help out of the blue isn't on. You either needed my help before you pushed me out or you dont" and "you and only you are the blame for everything". He also doesn't buy our child a present or a card on special occasions (birthday or Christmas) because he thinks I might sell them (I'm not sure where this idea has come from). He also said he wont support our child financially because he has two children (from a previous relationship) and is on UC, which was the case when we were in a relationship. His situation is the same now as it was when we were in a relationship. He helped buy a few things when baby was born but ever since we split up he has refused to help, doesnt ask how his child is ect. AIBU for asking for a bit of support? I want my child to know who their father is but he keeps bringing up the past and isn't able to be civil. I'm not even sure if he even cares because he never asks about his child.