Sleeping issues driving me crazy, help!

[mossystone]

Posting for traffic after another horrific night.
Dd has just turned 1 and still wakes up at least once during the night. I give her a bottle and change her then put her back in her cot. When she was smaller she would go back to sleep within minutes. Now she is able to stand, she stands up in her cot or kneels and just cries and shouts. It goes on for hours. Last night she got up at 1am and it was 3am before she fell asleep again.

Her cot is in our room because it's easier for me to deal with her if she's next to me and also I don't want her antics to wake up my older dc whose rooms are closer to hers. But I am desperate really for her to sleep through and get in her own room.

I feel so anxious in bed, like im waiting for her to wake up. And even when she eventually goes back to sleep my nerves are so shot I struggle to nod back off. There is no pattern to her waking up, sometimes it can be as early as 11pm, other times it will be 4am but each time she takes hours to go back to sleep. I have to repeatedly lay her back down from standing or kneeling position.

She's a very active baby and I have older dc too so this lack of sleep is making it so hard to deal with the busy days with them all. I feel like shit.

Does anyone have any advice or tips?

Bump

Is the nap the problem? Could you make it earlier? Is she just needing one nap now?

Can you phase out the bottle? Just offer water so she doesn’t have anything very exciting to to wake up for, and then phase out the water too.

Is her cot next to your bed so you (or DH?!) can just reach out to her without getting up yourself.

Also, is she waking at a similar time every night. We noticed our DS was doing that and he was waking up more out of habit than hunger. We stopped doing the milk and he soon realised it wasn't worth waking up for. You might have to endure a bit of short term crying for some long term gain

Sounds like split nights. It's time to drop the second nap or cap the length of their only map if she has 1.

She only has one nap a day now. Usually late morning. She's always tired when she goes to bed and tends to sleep well up until the wake up which can vary from anywhere between 11-4. Then once she's awake she's awake for hours.

I did wonder about dropping the bottle but I think she'd still be hard to settle.

Yes she's next to our bed in her cot. We play white noise so that any noise we make shouldn't wake her. I'm just desperate for a full nights sleep or at least for her to go back down quickly after a wake up. My anxiety is through the roof.

I'd move her into her own room, she can see you so probably not helping her to go back to sleep.

Also don't change her nappy, buy gigger size if she is is leaking, that will be waking her up more. I've never changed baby's nappies over night unless there is a poo. Pick up, 5 mins to drink their bottle and back in cot to sleep

You need to drop the bottle (1yr olds shouldn't be using a bottle at all - Are you brushing her teeth afterwards?) And I don't change nappies during the night (Obviously I would for a dirty one), no wonder she's awake for hours, she's being completely overstimulated.

If she wakes, shush and pat back to sleep. Have a cup of water if needed, keep room dark, no talking. Night time is for sleeping only as a toddler.

She seems to wake up in an overstimulated state 🙈 that's the problem. She isn't just grizzling, she is standing/kneeling repeatedly and shouting and crying. I agree getting her out of the cot to feed and change her is probably waking her up more though. She does have a few health issues that means she's still having 3-4 bottles of special formula a day and I do worry she really is hungry hence the wake up.

Sounds like split nights, might be worth changing nap length or nap time. I think there is also a 12 month sleep regression that night ad worth looking into.