I suspect I am ND and a lot of my issues stem from that as well as a lack of confidence.
Despite having been in full time employment since graduating, I haven't made a new friend in what must be 4 years now.
Honestly, the very small number of friends I have are from school or uni, and friends is a term I'd use loosely, I barely see them.
I'm quieter than average and in my experience people don't really want to be friends with quiet people. I work in a place with many other women, I do make conversation and I'm friendly. However I've been there for 3 months and I've not formed any close bonds. There's a lot of polite conversation and I'm sure they think I'm nice, but that's it.
A woman started here a week ago and has already formed close bonds, they just like her a lot more.
My partner is someone else who has friends sprouting out of his ears and always out socialising. he invites me sometimes which is nice but social anxiety causes problems for me. In my mind, his friends see me as very quiet, not right for him and there have been comments about how we're 'very different '.
I may never marry or have children but that's ok. The only thing I'm proud of ATM is my job, I've had pay rises and finally doing something for a respectable wage which is related to my degree.
I feel lonely a lot of the time. I'm lucky to have both my parents who are still fairly young and in good health, I've got a close bond with them .
People will suggest joining clubs, I've tried but it's the same as at work, I struggle to make connections.
I'm ok with asking people questions but I get embarrassed sharing long anecdotes about myself like a lot of people seem to do.
I know a lot of it is on me and won't improve until I change, wish I knew how.