boyfriend

[Brunettebarb]

So during covid I separated sold my big beautiful house and went to buy another but when the market went crazy I couldn't. Well I probably could've but I thought it would get better and it just got worse. So now I'm stuck in an apartment for the first time in my life even tho I owned a home since I was 23. I'm 39. Already feeling pretty crappy about the entire situation. Anyway, I don't have my kids half the week and I sleep at my boyfriends lovely home when I don't have them. He very rarely comes to my house. And states that he would've come to my house more if I owned a home but he's not as comfortable in an apartment so he would rather me go there. I feel like I do most of the work here going back and forth and it's frustrating.

He sounds like a right catch 🙄

What is he not comfortable with in relation to apartments? That seems like a strange thing to be uncomfortable with. If you feel like you’re doing most of the work and you aren’t happy then you need to have that conversation with him otherwise you’ll just end up resenting him more and more.

Which part of the world/ UK are you in?

Does he never see you when you have your children? How long have you been together?

Depends if you see it being long term or not, and what you want in life.

Not a great start so far

Just stop going round his so often. Invite him round to you - specifically say "would you like to come round for dinner tonight?". If he says no, you're under no obligation to go to his.

In fact, i'd be taking a (little) step back and let him do a bit more of the running. Did he buy you a nice Easter Egg?

Hmm depends what his issue is, really. Not liking apartments sounds like an excuse for something else, maybe he doesn't want to hurt your feelings if he said eg his house is nicer/more comfortable or similar

I mean he basically says that lol so it does hurt my feelings. But his house is nicer and it is more comfortable, and my old house that I sold was way nicer than his current house. I miss it so much, had I known I would've bought my ex out. But it is what it is. If the roles were reversed I would go to his house when he couldn't come to mine.

Agree with this - take a step back and let him do some of the work. Invite him round and if he won't, that's good issue. You don't have to go round to his and you've made it clear you'd like to see him if he comes round. Kind of feels like your bf likes to see you when it's on his terms and convenient. What about what's convenient for you?