Is this normal eating for a 14 month old

[Desperate1010]

We've got the option to be referred for feeding therapy by HV but I've had differing opinions on whether DC's eating is within range or whether they're behind.

Will eat most premade baby food pots/pouches from the 12m section (although lately is getting fussier with them), loves a yoghurt.

Will potentially eat a homemade lumpy puree depending on texture/the mood he's in.

Finger foods, will usually eat toast, occasionally bread and butter. Sometime a banana Ate a fish finger once. Crisps, cake, chocolate, biscuits all acceptable (rarely given but was advised to offer any and everything to get them interested in putting food in their mouth) would sell soul if a ricecake was offered. Anything else gets launched as soon as it's within reach, won't even pretend to consider eating it .

Weaning went brilliantly in the early days, textbook even. Offered a mix of homemade and shop bought purees depending on time (is youngest sibling so juggling a toddler meant sometimes we couldn't get anything made) and offered finger foods to supplement. Always eats at the table with family, offered the same food as everyone else, let him take food off our plates if interested. Finger foods where never a favourite but everyone said it was 'food for fun before 1' and he'd do it in his own time but now we're over 1, it's not just for fun and surprise surprise nothing has changed.

We have had huge issues with constipation since birth, poorly managed with on again/off again laxatives. Won't drink anything other than milk, occasionally can get a bit of water into him but it's a rarity!

I'm going to ask nursery for their professional opinion - I'd hoped that when he was surrounded by others he'd eat a bit more but we're 2 and a half months in and no real progress. I just wondered what most 14month olds 'should' be eating, I can't compare to older sibling as they had allergy issues and reflux and didn't eat anything solid until around this age when we got that under control, but then just started eating as if they'd been doing it their whole life so not a typical comparison!!

I'm tempted to take the referral and just see what they say but if there's loads of kids this age surviving off lumpy puree and refusing most finger foods I wouldn't want to waste anyone's time!

Not a health professional in any way, just a normal mum with a 2y old, but that sounds pretty standard to me! My DC started eating better when they got more teeth (this was late, around 20 months) and up until then I'd say they were having mostly what your DC is, though macaroni cheese made with tiny soup pasta shells was always a fave as well, but honestly yours sounds fine to me!

My now 6 year old weaned well, mix of purees and BLW. Since 14 months, he has only ate 5 or 6 different foods. Every professional has said "it's a phase" "he'll grow out of it" etc etc. Well, he hasn't. He's 6 now. He definitely has some sensory issues with food, bit noone has taken us seriously. It's fairly soul destroying. Being a nursery with other kids eating different things didn't help, same with school now. Take the help if it's offered. Even if they deem him to be fine for his age, at least you will have had him checked. Lots of luck.

It sounds like a lot of soft or puréed foods to me. Why are you even making lumpy purées at home? Would you not just serve what you’re having?

At 14/5 months mine was just eating what the adults had. The occasional purée while travelling and loved yoghurt but lots of normal foods. Pasta, potatoes/meat/veg, omelettes, sandwiches etc

Because if I don't make him a lumpy puree be just doesn't eat. It's usually a puree of whatever we're having, but I guess it's a battle of wills and he's won/winning. There's only so many times you can watch your child refuse to eat and then scream all night for milk because they're hungry only to repeat the next day before you give in. The HV suggested we do one meal we know he'll eat (so a purée) and one that's a challenge which we do, so now he just eats one less meal a day, he won't entertain it

In my experience it can be normal. My daughter really only started eating better at 18 months and I thought it wouldn’t happen. Before then she preferred smoother foods and rejected a lot of finger food (even bread for ages!). I’d give it another couple of months, make sure to serve some normal meals too.

This is my concern. It may not help and we may still end up where you are but I worry if I haven't taken whatever help I can now if I'll be kicking myself down the line for not doing everything I can

I have three DC, all very good eaters, and they all went through a fussy stage around 14m. So I think it is normal! Carry on offering a variety of food, don't worry if he's not interested, keep mealtimes low stress. Hang in there and I bet it will improve soon.

@YellowGreenBlue My 13 month old is going through a fussy stage at the moment - how long did this last for with your kids? X

My 14 month old is similar but does eat a lot better at nursery than he does at home, despite all my cooking efforts! He is also very unpredictable with what he likes when so I can be sure he will eat something because he has loved to before to find he just rejects it. One thing which has really helped is allowing him to try to feed himself with a spoon. We realised got told he was quite good at it at nursery and had no idea he had even been practicing! He almost treats it as a game and although hit or miss, does get some into his mouth and laps up the praise so keeps going. Maybe worth a shot? We have been doing this for around a week, guiding his spoon on the plate to help him a little and he's got a lot better at it just in that time. For my DS I think his attention span is his problem

Is he drinking a lot of milk?

It’s very filling, so I’d try and offer food before milk.

@poppet131 on and off for a few months. Hang in there!

I have 3, eldest two were and are a dream with food (not with everything else just in case you think I’m being smug!). Youngest one is nearly 15 months and has been a lot harder, he is a pretty good eater now generally, but I’ve had to be a lot more relaxed with him, if you’re on Instagram, Charlotte Stirling-Reed (sr_nutrition) has some great advice on food refusal and about not offering ‘alternatives.’ I would personally say that as your toddler has eaten cake, crisps, fish finger, biscuits etc they perhaps don’t have an issue with eating solid food, but obviously I’m not a professional and it could be they have sensory issues or whatever.

The things that have helped me with my 14 month old (a mixture of advice from solid starts (also on insta- I don’t agree with everything they say but they do have some great advice) Charlotte S-R and also naturedockids on insta and my own common sense: (Disclaimer, this won’t work if your child has an actual eating disorder/medical issue). And obviously if there are growth issues don’t take this as what to do.

Take the emotion out of mealtimes. I was guilty of praising my son if he ate ‘well’ but actually it’s much better to be very neutral.

Never force, bribe, coerce or trick him into eating anything even if that means him eating nothing at one meal.

Don’t offer alternatives. If he’s old enough to point/ask for other food, just repeat, ‘I’m sorry that’s not on the menu today.’ And repeat. It sounds crazy but even with my nearly 15 month old he is getting it slowly.

Understand that toddlers appetites go up and down HUGELY and can really vary even from meal to meal. Sometimes my little boy will eat a good breakfast, next to no lunch and a great dinner. I’ve learnt to accept this and not push.

Give some autonomy over what he’s eating, so eg I’ve discovered my son loves a bit of low salt soy sauce on his broccoli, you can also do ‘sprinkles’ eg desiccated coconut on fruit etc.

Personally I’ve also stopped any kind of commercial baby food and snacks, except for the odd rice cake.

If you’re worried though I’d take the appointment and see what they say, especially if constipation is also an issue (it is for my son too).

If he likes toast could you try putting a little tomato puree and cheese on top and throw it in the air fryer for a couple minutes to make pizza bread? Just slowly expand on what he's eating? I think a lot of 14 months olds have good appetites and eat a range of meals and finger foods but plenty are fussy and still don't like lumps, my friends son was the same around that age and he's pretty good now.