Nanny employment horror stories..

Sortyourlifeout · 2023-04-06T12:11:53+00:00

Come on then Nannies and Employers. What's your worst experiences? I've been a Nanny for 25 years. This account was when I was about 15 years in. My own fault for allowing myself to be bullied. Family consisted of Mum, Dad, B2, G4 at start of employment; * Holidays had to be taken on THEIR terms. I stupidly agreed to it. I was once screamed at for asking for a week of my own choosing. * I asked for a day off for my birthday as I wanted to go for a spa weekend. She laughed in my face whilst saying "wouldn't it be lovely if we all had time of for our birthdays. She then proceeded to book the day of my birthday off from HER work and went to a spa. I stupidly stayed. * She allowed her 4 year old to kick me and slap me in the face. When I (quite rightly) put some discipline in place, I was told that I was wrong and that "I don't care if they hit us, as long as they aren't hitting each other". I stupidly stayed. * She told me I could have a party whilst they were away (I was live-in). She knew ALL my friends, she knew that I was bloody responsible and then made me cancel the party AN HOUR BEFORE it was meant to start. I'd spent a fortune on dinners and drinks. And my friends had made a massive effort (it was Halloween). I called her sister in tears and she told me to call everyone to let them know the venue had changed - to HER house. She was an absolute star. But I stupidly stayed in the job. * I handed my notice in after being there nearly 2 years. She was SCREAMING in my face "HOW CAN YOU DO THIS, HOW DARE YOU, I THOUGHT YOU LOVED MY KIDS...ETC...". Super aggressive. I stupidly retracted my resignation and stayed another 8 months. There is SO much more. I became a shadow of myself due to being so bullied

Original poster

Sortyourlifeout · 06/04/2023 13:14

Another employer came on to me after I had been babysitting. They'd been in the pub.

He tried to squeeze my boob. When I moved away, his wife laughed and said "Go on, you know you want to".

I never went back.

OP posts:

Mrsphilmiller · 06/04/2023 14:30

Ewwwwwwww to the man trying to squeeze your boob!!
I know a lot of people would say how could you not leave, but it’s not always possible.

Katrinawaves · 06/04/2023 14:39

I came home from work early to find my nanny dressed head to toe in my clothes. Including my underwear.

Also had an issue with same nanny opening my post.

Ludo19 · 06/04/2023 14:42

When I qualified as a nursery nurse, I worked in Italy for a year. The family lied about how many children they had and their ages......only found out when I arrived.

The eldest (8) could speak English but the two little girls could not. I was picked up late and driven to the house. When I woke in the morning, she had left for Venice and I was faced with three kids instead of two and two of which were petrified and couldn't understand me.

When I came downstairs there was a big nazi flag pinned to the ceiling, a huge and I mean enormous bust of Mussolini carved of malachite and pictures of hilter and Mussolini.....

He never did his national service and his mother (grandmother) was German. Had 7 houses dotted around Italy too. He now has a jewellery shop in New York run by the son.

She was a complete horror to work for and her husband was in my room at 2am twice. I was only 20 where he was late 40's. I asked the gardiner to put a lock on the door. I was hospitalised twice with sunstroke as she spent ALL DAY at the beach and I couldn't sit in the shade.

Awful experience so I came home and trained as a dental nurse but I'm now a vet nurse.....much happier!

Original poster

Sortyourlifeout · 06/04/2023 15:03

Katrinawaves · 06/04/2023 14:39

I came home from work early to find my nanny dressed head to toe in my clothes. Including my underwear.

Also had an issue with same nanny opening my post.

That is very bizarre!!

OP posts:

Original poster

Sortyourlifeout · 06/04/2023 15:05

Ludo19 · 06/04/2023 14:42

When I qualified as a nursery nurse, I worked in Italy for a year. The family lied about how many children they had and their ages......only found out when I arrived.

The eldest (8) could speak English but the two little girls could not. I was picked up late and driven to the house. When I woke in the morning, she had left for Venice and I was faced with three kids instead of two and two of which were petrified and couldn't understand me.

When I came downstairs there was a big nazi flag pinned to the ceiling, a huge and I mean enormous bust of Mussolini carved of malachite and pictures of hilter and Mussolini.....

He never did his national service and his mother (grandmother) was German. Had 7 houses dotted around Italy too. He now has a jewellery shop in New York run by the son.

She was a complete horror to work for and her husband was in my room at 2am twice. I was only 20 where he was late 40's. I asked the gardiner to put a lock on the door. I was hospitalised twice with sunstroke as she spent ALL DAY at the beach and I couldn't sit in the shade.

Awful experience so I came home and trained as a dental nurse but I'm now a vet nurse.....much happier!

What an awful experience! So sorry you went through that.

OP posts:

Ludo19 · 06/04/2023 15:09

@Sortyourlifeout it's funny I look back on it now like it's a lifetime away well it was 27yrs ago now but it was dreadful and I was only 20 and it was my first time away from home abroad.

Your experience sounds horrific too and the "lady" you worked for sounds a horror and the violent child 😉

ghostyslovesheets · 06/04/2023 15:10

Not a terrible one but I do remember being asked by my American employer which out fit she should wear for Henley and Ascot?! I was 19 and from a small terrace house in Liverpool - I had not a clue but suggested flats because of the grass!

Same employer often came home from a busy day getting nails/hair done, shopping with friends and a long lunch to lie on the sofa in the best room with a glass of wine shouting 'Ghosty get these kids away from me I'm tired'! I'm quiet jealous now as a single mum of 3 - what a nice life. Generally though they where good employers and I got some fab holidays (private beach club in Monaco anyone?) so I can't complain - I was probably pretty shit at nannying - good with the kids but clueless about the housework stuff

Soes · 06/04/2023 15:15

My ex boss came home unexpectedly to find her husband and the nanny having sex in the marital bed. For some reason she (the ex boss) had an umbrella in her hand and set about the husband, leaving him with bruises and cuts and he had to go to A & E. The nanny fled naked to the house next door and the bemused neighbour called the police fearing someone was being murdered (which he nearly was).

TakemedowntoPotatoCity · 06/04/2023 15:17

French family
Used to leave their babies alone to go to neighbours - once I came back after midnight on New Year's Day and the kids were alone, up in bed, crying. I was drunk but still furious. They came back home after ten minutes and said they had 'just nipped' next door.
The neighbours would do the same , come to their house for lunch in the garden and leave baby at home, thinking it was ok as they had a monitor with them. Oh, and because both families had good professional jobs and were upper middle class, so naturally completely different to if someone on benefits did this 🙄 (i.e no difference whatsoever) Twats.

Original poster

Sortyourlifeout · 06/04/2023 15:29

ghostyslovesheets · 06/04/2023 15:10

Not a terrible one but I do remember being asked by my American employer which out fit she should wear for Henley and Ascot?! I was 19 and from a small terrace house in Liverpool - I had not a clue but suggested flats because of the grass!

Same employer often came home from a busy day getting nails/hair done, shopping with friends and a long lunch to lie on the sofa in the best room with a glass of wine shouting 'Ghosty get these kids away from me I'm tired'! I'm quiet jealous now as a single mum of 3 - what a nice life. Generally though they where good employers and I got some fab holidays (private beach club in Monaco anyone?) so I can't complain - I was probably pretty shit at nannying - good with the kids but clueless about the housework stuff

Loads of my employers asked advice on outfits. Totally normal!

Love how you describe working holidays as 'holidays' though. I've never seen them as holidays. They are bloomin' hard work 🤣

OP posts:

Original poster

Sortyourlifeout · 06/04/2023 15:30

Soes · 06/04/2023 15:15

My ex boss came home unexpectedly to find her husband and the nanny having sex in the marital bed. For some reason she (the ex boss) had an umbrella in her hand and set about the husband, leaving him with bruises and cuts and he had to go to A & E. The nanny fled naked to the house next door and the bemused neighbour called the police fearing someone was being murdered (which he nearly was).

😱😱😱

OP posts:

Charlottewebsbabies · 06/04/2023 15:41

Not me but a friend of mine

They had a nanny but she was doing bits that they where not happy about-but as her daddy was paying nannies wages,they let it go

Until one night she was either out or was doing nights (I'm going back 20+ years) and he was asleep in bed

The nanny tried to get into bed with him-naked

Caused a fuss at the time and the nanny tried to sue for being sacked with no notice or something-i can't remember how it all panned out after that

I was a nanny years ago and have no stories!

Trinity65 · 06/04/2023 15:44

Wow some of these Tales..

This is the kind of thread that, if made into a book, I would buy it.

I bought Twas the Nightshift before Christmas for that reason.

Original poster

Sortyourlifeout · 06/04/2023 15:46

Trinity65 · 06/04/2023 15:44

Wow some of these Tales..

This is the kind of thread that, if made into a book, I would buy it.

I bought Twas the Nightshift before Christmas for that reason.

I've often thought of writing a book, actually! I might make a start!

I'm also very interested in hearing from employers who have had a tough time with nannies!

OP posts:

Trinity65 · 06/04/2023 15:49

Sortyourlifeout · 06/04/2023 15:46

I've often thought of writing a book, actually! I might make a start!

I'm also very interested in hearing from employers who have had a tough time with nannies!

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Roselilly36 · 06/04/2023 15:52

I knew an acquaintance, that was a nanny, she had an affair with the husband and then ended up marrying and having a family with him, needless to say they didn’t have a nanny!

gogohmm · 06/04/2023 15:53

Not exactly a horror story but I went through 6 nannies in 6 weeks then told my new employer I couldn't start after all... that's autism for you - we were upfront about what looking after non verbal but bright 4 year entailed, they met the children with me present, then on the trial day (I would pop out for a couple of hours they would quit. She was hard work!!! We were paying good money hence so much interest in the position

Creamcrackersandricecakes · 06/04/2023 15:55

I've been really lucky with employers - all of mine have been nice, reasonable people. A friend of one of my previous employers had a nanny who started off really well, then gradually got odder and odder. She was convinced her employer was a terrible mother, (no evidence of that whatsoever), and would tell everyone that the children should be hers to keep because they had an 'unbreakable bond'. She then visited a medium who told her that she had been the children's mother in a previous life, (wtf???), and that was why they were so close.
She eventually got sacked after a screaming row and tried to grab and take the youngest child with her as she stormed out . Mum had to wrestle the child off her and threaten the police. Bonkers.

Trinity65 · 06/04/2023 15:59

Creamcrackersandricecakes · 06/04/2023 15:55

I've been really lucky with employers - all of mine have been nice, reasonable people. A friend of one of my previous employers had a nanny who started off really well, then gradually got odder and odder. She was convinced her employer was a terrible mother, (no evidence of that whatsoever), and would tell everyone that the children should be hers to keep because they had an 'unbreakable bond'. She then visited a medium who told her that she had been the children's mother in a previous life, (wtf???), and that was why they were so close.
She eventually got sacked after a screaming row and tried to grab and take the youngest child with her as she stormed out . Mum had to wrestle the child off her and threaten the police. Bonkers.

😮
God, that is real Hand that Rocks the Cradle territory

AskMeMore · 06/04/2023 16:02

A woman who used to literally scream at her husband about the latest thing she was unhappy about. She also accused me of stealing things that she mislaid like a maternity bra and bizarrely a couple of plates. I was 20 years old and the last thing I wanted was an old maternity bra.

I went for a job where the last nanny had been sacked for being a prostitute - she was bringing men back to her annexe.

Aintnosupermum · 06/04/2023 16:03

gogohmm · 06/04/2023 15:53

Not exactly a horror story but I went through 6 nannies in 6 weeks then told my new employer I couldn't start after all... that's autism for you - we were upfront about what looking after non verbal but bright 4 year entailed, they met the children with me present, then on the trial day (I would pop out for a couple of hours they would quit. She was hard work!!! We were paying good money hence so much interest in the position

Yup. My elder two both have autism/add and childcare has always been an issue. I’m extremely lucky to be able to afford 1-1 for both children now they are older. I found success hiring students from the local college/university studying occupational or speech therapy or I hired the staff who worked with them during the day.

Anyone who joins, except the au pair, has training from their therapists. My au pair is amazing and has experience of working with special needs children. I eased her in during the first week and laid out schedules, allowing her to change them as necessary.

No real horror stories of nanny’s. I keep it professional with a written contract, schedule and weekly meeting. Pay is always on a Friday.

Season0fTheWitch · 06/04/2023 16:27

The first nanny we hired, we were wary of. So I set up cameras in every room she shouldn't be in as we asked- our bedroom, bathroom, etc and DH's office among others. I checked the footage and saw her sniffing DH's clothes and putting our sex toys in a black bag I later found in a bin. Creep! She didn't even ask why I asked her to leave.

We interviewed and trialled a second nanny who after a few hours with DD told us she was autistic and far behind her development. She thought DD was 3, she was 2. Was adamant we were wrong about our own child's age and later told her agency that we were unfit parents.

I was an au pair in Italy as a teenager and had a horrible employer- a single mother who wanted me to parent her child while she went on holidays with various boyfriends.