State school Uk vs International school abroad

[Lentilsandyoghurt]

Hey all,

I know not many of you have such experience but I am wondering whether a good state school in the Uk will provide better education and opportunities for my kids or an international school abroad that follows British curriculum is better.

We are not originally from the Uk, we come from a EU country and we may need to good soon back for family reasons.

The kids are still young, primary school kids and have been raised as bilingual.

What do you think will be best for them?

Eventually in 10 years time they will return in the Uk to study as they will follow the British curriculum no matter where we will be.

YABU - Stay in the Uk
YANBU - Kids will be fine in whichever country

Wherever you are. Kids need their parents more than they need one sort of school over another.

My kids have been to international schools abroad (British curriculum) and now back in U.K. state school - to be honest overall there’s not much difference between it. International was better for sports/creative side but I would say the state has better foundations for maths and English. I would imagine if they’d stayed at either there won’t have been a huge variation in GCSE results etc

Yep

This is absolutely impossible to answer. Some international schools are great. Others benefit from a captive market and produce sub par results. Some British state schools are fantastic. Others are awful. Then there’s your kids and whether they’d appreciate or resent a move because kids usually do best when they’re happy. But if a move is inevitable whilst they’re still at school then probably the earlier time the better because generally speaking a 6 year old will settle far easier and quicker than a 16 year old, not to mention moving during exam years causes a whole lot of problems.

My kids are in a very good (by reputation and marketing) international school with a British curriculum and I am not impressed. It’s more like an ofsted outstanding state school. And it costs A BOMB. I can totally understand why international families
send their kids to board in the UK.
Mine will return to their uk indie (that we left a few years ago)
soon. Many parents where we are send the kids back to England for boarding as soon as GCSE’s come into play.

my priorities/choices would be
-family together when they are young
-UK for senior school
-boarding as last resort.

What are your options OP? I can’t quite figure it out. Do you want to leave them in the uk with family while you are posted abroad? X

I don't quite understand the question. Surely if you have to move back to your home country anyway then the DC will move with you, as they can't stay here and go to a state school alone? Or are you trying to work out whether having DC in a UK state school is a benefit worth staying in the country for rather than moving back?

It's an impossible question to answer without knowing more about the schools involved. I wouldn't have thought either was automatically the better option as it really does depend on the individual schools. You could try the Living Overseas section to see if anyone knows the specific international school, and presumably you know something of your local UK school already?

Thanks all for the answers.

We don’t have any family in the Uk, we came here to study and work a long time ago and our parents and families are in our home country.

We need to go back as our parents are in a poorly state and they need us to be close to them in their final years and it will also be good for the kids to spend some time and make memories with grandparents.

However, we would not like to upset the lives or their kids if we are not certain it will be for their benefit.

Is more of a question parents vs kids and head vs heart really!

I know it’s a tough one to answer without knowing specifics and school performances.

Tough one. As you plan to move back to the UK, I would personally only move the kids if you are certain that the move will make your whole family happier. If they are happy and settled here, and so are you and DH (and if your local schools and area are nice) then I would stay and spend holidays in your home country. Having moved around a bit, I do think it becomes quite hard to uproot DC the older they get and you face having to do that twice if you don't intend it to be a permanent move.

Ohhh so you are thinking of moving from the uk back to your home country and that if you do, the kids will go to an international school? Have you looked into the local international/British school and would you be happy with it, can you afford it, would the kids get places? That would surely answer your question.

If you need to go that's all there is to it. And much as I love our DC's state school, it's hard to imagine it trumping the opportunity to live properly in 2 different countries, grow up with extended family etc. It doesn't sound like parents v kids at all.

We could just about afford it although international schools abroad are very expensive. Obviously, if we could stay in the Uk that would be financially much more healthier for us.

We don’t really want to move as we are settled but it’s so unfair to just forget our parents back in their final years that are so needy (mainly emotionally and less physically).

It’s a very tough one…

Yes, we would be happy with the international school in our home country and getting a place there won’t be an issue. Also, our kids would get to learn our home country language much better, so there are benefits.

The only drawbacks of going back in my mind is the financial one and the fact that the kids will lose familiarity and start from scratch to reestablish themselves.

I know that going back the earlier will be the best for them but every year we stay in the Uk is a massive financial gain for us as we don’t need to pay for expensive international schools.

Think very carefully if you really want to uproot your entire lives in the UK to go and take care of elderly parents.
If you ever intend to come back to the UK, I can hand on heart say this will be a very foolish move, unless you have done ALL the sums.
income parity
pension contributions
property - btl here while you are away?
kids education, friends, opportunities
career progression and further study
cost of living (i personally don’t think the UK is that expensive compared to similar)
healthcare
does your parents really expect this???

Our parents are now mid 70’s and we expect that all holidays for the next few years after we complete this posting abroad will be back to our home country to see our parents.
Use technology to stay in touch- set it up and teach them how to use it
Buy help in
Sort out their housing and make sure it is adequate for their needs

International schools are ridiculously
expensive.

X post

This think very carefully OP. In fact so many people I know come back to England (eg when they’re out in Dubai working etc) to school their kids here.

Take them with you. They will be fine and get a decent education wherever. Ps British Education isn't what it was.

Think of where you and the kids want to live long term beyond your parents lifespan.

Then make a plan accordingly. Perhaps a boomerang move, temporarily relocating back home for up to 10 years, sending the kids to international schools, then they can choose university in UK or elsewhere, and you can decide staying in your home country or going to the UK?

Or go back permanently and make use of your educational and living experience in the UK to establish a new life back home. Lots of people do so and become more financially successful than if they remained in the UK. If so then choose the best local schools, rather than expensive mediocre international schools. The kids will have strong cultural ties to your home country and can also choose where they want to go.

maddy68 - I can’t speak for mainland europe, but I can tell you that the english (no experience of wales, ni or scotland) education system, even state, is still very, very good, despite the sensational headlines.

ChiefPearlClutcher makes some very serious points to consider.

I'd also think about the age of kids and what happens if your parents live longer than you're expecting so you end up staying until the kids are in exam years and then want to come back to the U.K. Obviously you want your parents to have a long and healthy life, but as the whole point of returning is being with them before they die, this is also something to consider. Moving during exam years is much trickier and everybody I know who makes international moves for work goes to a lot of effort to avoid a country change during these years. They plan for it years in advance where possible.

As for British schools abroad, in my experience that can be fine, but the ratio of what you get to fees is lower than in the U.K. For a start there's far less competition. There is also a naturally smaller pool of teachers. Facilities may be good, but teaching quality may be quite average.

The other thing is that in a U.K. state school you're engaged with the community and society. With British schools abroad you're naturally in a bubble. First due to finances and second due to language. While you're obviously natives of that country and your kids speak the language, the school community your kids are in for most of their lives will be a (very privileged) bubble. If you're fine with that then it's not a problem. In that social aspect though it's in no way comparable to a UK state school.

I've got my kids in a local school where I live (EU). They were in private schools first, including a British one. The social aspect of going local was huge. They still have friends in the international schools who are just as lovely as their local friends, but the lack of true connection the international school kids have with local life is increasingly obvious. They don't even play sport against teams with local kids, because they compete against other international schools. I think I would want to really look into the social side of things and make sure the kids would have regular opportunities to integrate with local kids if I were thinking of moving back to my home town/country and putting them in an international school.

Sorry just realised in 10 years they'll go to uni. So basically if you move after the summer you'll either have to come back to the U.K. in about 5 years, or stay 10. Definitely check the pensions issue!

Very good points regarding social integration abroad and pensions! Thanks for the heads up!

They both need careful thought and consideration.

In 10 years time we would be 15 years before pension. I am not sure if it would be worth coming back in the Uk or staying in our home country and let our kids follow the path they want. I think this is something for us to reevaluate at that point.

Leaving in between two countries is so unsettling. I say that from experience as I have lived for 20 years in my home country and for 20 years in the Uk.

Top tier International schools are expensive and if they are top tier usually quite difficult to get into. Lower tier can be dreadful.
Good ones tend to be in the commercial/capital cities areas eg Mumbai/ Delhi if in India but academically should be better than an average state secondary.

Be aware that if your children are living outside the UK before going to Uni, they will probably be treated as international students. The fees are much much higher. This applies even if they have British nationality, it’s usually assessed on résidence not just nationality.

if you do this, you will be paying international fees at university too, and have no access to student loans

how about staying in the UK bit spending all school holidays with your parents? How would that work out financially and with annual leave etc?