To ask you to help me be 'normal'!?

[Alittlenonsensenowandthen]

A semi light hearted post about parenting teens (all boys x3). It's the Easter holidays, we're not going anywhere as we're skint and I'm suffering from a combination of fomo, the belief I'm a crap parent if I let them go anywhere near screens on a sunny day and feeling on the back foot as I'm full of cold.

I feel like I've lost all perspective of a 'normal' day with them, of whether it matters if they stay in their room gaming, how much I need to prescribe their downtime etc etc.

When they were little I used to love the holidays and we would fill up our days with wholesome activities - baking, nature walks, craft, gardening, building endless things out of Lego. You get the idea.

Now I have three teens and I literally feel at a loss as to what to do with them. They still like walking so we do go out for walks and they enjoy reading but other than that im stuck and now that their bedtime is 10pm there's a lot of time to fill.

Thanks for reading my ranting message. I feel lik I have parenting burn out! Hand hold please 🙂

That is normal for teens

Getting them out for a walk is a big win!

Do they not have any friends they'd go out with?

Firstly well done for getting this far - raising 3 boys is a massive job, and a very difficult one, particularly now with all the technology.

I have a teenage boy and all I can do is tell you what I do:
I allow a little TV in the mornings. Any gaming or phone use is saved for the afternoon or early evening (1 hour a day during holidays - although that can go into 2 hours).
I encourage him to go out most days if not all with his friends, unless we have a day out planned.
He does chores for pocket money - so today was only tidy room and dishes. Tomorrow he is mowing the grass and cleaning my car (if he suddenly makes plans to go on his bike or walk etc with friends that fine - the lawn and car will wait 😁
He might cook dinner one evening.
Come with me to town (its a good mile to 2 miles away)
Walk the dog, Hour of reading a day. All electronics tv etc off from 7pm twice a week - the chess board soon comes out then!

I don't know if that's any help whatsoever. I imagine 3 boys - hard work - you have to have to have a schedule on the fridge pre arranged otherwise u never get them to do as u expect - I imagine x x

Do you still have the Lego?!

Why not upgrade to slightly more adult versions? Baking or cooking something posh - Jamie Olivers comfort food usually takes a long time but is soooo worth it.

Thanks for the answers. Like the grown up cooking idea and yes we still have Lego.

I'm sad about the friends thing as that's what I expected at this stage. They are few and far between. Their school is a distance away so don't get together with school friends and the ones locally all go away skiing or other expensive activities during the hols and we're excluded.

I've definitely been too soft on the chores side. We used to home school and they did loads but because they've returned to school and found it tiring I've let that go a bit. They still do the dog walks, clean their rooms and wash their bedding but that's all.
Thanks for the encouragement 😊

Im not perfect, I feel exactly the same, I then have to sit down talk to the kids - write lists, agreements new routines and start again! we all do.

Another one - send them to the supermarket for the shopping!

Massive amounts of screen time sounds normal to me for teenagers! People act like it’s new thing but I would literally spend 8 hours a day on the computer as a teen in the school holidays (and I think I turned out fine!)

Lure them out for a walk if you can, cook some nice meals together (homemade pizza?), watch a movie together and don’t stress too much. If you do have the odd bit of cash to do a little trip out then food often greases the wheels e.g. a walk along the sea front and some fish and chips. But otherwise I really wouldn’t stress, I don’t imagine most teenagers are doing much different

I’m working this week so my teens are watching tv and walking the dog. I’m planning a trip to the coast over the bank holiday but next week we’ll probably have film nights most nights.

I find teen boys will do anything if food is involved. Lunch or dinner out. Walk followed by cake or the pub if they are old enough.

Mine is only 14 so he will still come for a walk on the beach or maybe bowling or the cinema at a push but I realise that all costs £££ especially with 3!

My teens are in their rooms on screens. One is autistic and can’t tolerate being around their younger also autistic sister. Older teen is being bullied by her friend group so is hanging at home. Getting them to go for a walk would be a win for us. Second the other suggestions of Lego, cooking, maybe an hour playing board games?