To think you don’t have to have purely altruistic purposes to do something well?

[Crumpetwithpeanutbutter]

So - I’ll be straight up as to what this is about, but I’m speaking generally as well as specifically.

I’ve been considering leaving teaching and working as a foster carer for a while now. While I do have a genuine desire to help there is also an element of wanting this as a paid alternative to other types of work. I wanted information but I knew if I disclosed this I’d just get people telling me I was wrong and should only want to do it from a burning desire to help.

I notice this in teaching too and nursing - this idea of people going into it for the ‘wrong’ reasons, when actually I know lots of really good teachers who decided to teach because of holidays or because of their own young children.

So - AIBU to think it’s how good you are at something and not why you want to do it that is important?

I completely agree. If you've thought about it as a properly considered thought through career change with pros and cons, you're far more likely to stick to it and cope with the inevitable issues than if you're all starry eyed about saving the world.

Being a FC is a skilled job. Of course you should want to do it, it isn't something to do just for pay, but of course you'll be thinking about pay/conditions/lifestyle as well.

Pretty much anybody who does any sort of “caring” job is ultimately doing it because they need to earn a salary and they’re paid rather than entirely out of altruism. The two foster caters I know are very pragmatic people from teaching and youth work backgrounds who knew they had relevant skills and aptitude to work with children and young people therapeutically, rather than being gaga about babies and wanting to save them all.

I agree. I found it really eye-opening talking to my SIL who is a doctor but will freely admit that it's not a vocation for her, she's doing it for the money and flexibility (she's a GP who works part time). She finds the work pretty tedious but it pays her mortgage.

As a Social Worker, I can tell when carers are primarily financially motivated. Sometimes I don't even want to leave my children there. Yes it's a job, yes the pay can be attractive.. but what does that mean? I've had so many money focused carers just give up on children. It hurts them. Lots of carers motivated by the pay will just kick one out and get a new one in if the first starts being any trouble.
You have to be realistic that fostering a child is not like looking after any other child as they've had different experiences, trauma etc. Maybe think about just doing respite first to see how you find it. I absolute hate when kids are promised a new safe home and then the carers kick them out the first sign of trouble.
Don't get me wrong, some of my carers are the most incredible, giving people, and they can and do talk money to me. But the kids have to be first.

But what does primarily mean, @Zola1 ?

Does it mean they only want to do it for the money, and have no interest in the child at all?

Or does it mean they wouldn’t be in a position to do it if it didn’t pay?

Or does it mean they love what they do and recognise they are reimbursed for their time and care financially?

Or something else?

I mean, to put it another way, you are paid for your role, aren’t you?

It sounds as if I am nitpicking there and I promise I am not. I think it’s uncomfortable for many people because the role of a foster carer is of a mum/dad figure, we wouldn’t expect a mum to be paid so why should a foster carer, except mums sort of are paid in cases where there isn’t an alternative, through the benefits system.

I wouldn’t actually say my motives are mainly financial, it’s more about making a move to a more home based sort of role. But I do love working with children, and that’s mainly outside of the home, so I can bring the two together. It won’t be for a long time as my own children are still too little: a seven year plan if you like.

In terms of being a foster carer you both need to have the necessary skills for it and also know why you want to do it. Your motives for fostering would be explored at great lengths during the assessment and at any subsequent panel. It's a very difficult jobs and not everyone with the right skill set is cut out for the task.

One youngster I worked with described a foster placement as like being on 'half livery' (she was very into horses). Said she got all her physical needs well met but nothing more - so felt cared for but not cared about if that makes sense. She only realised the difference when in her next placement where she felt she actually mattered and was not just their next placement. Fostering is a challenging and skilled job and absolutely should be paid well, however I do think what motivates people to go into fostering can and does impact on their behaviour and the quality of care provided. It is not just a job. I think the same can be said of many other 'caring' roles too.