Just wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation, because I feel like I can’t tell any more whether I’m losing the plot. When I left my ex over three years ago I encouraged my parents to still be ok with him, and so I wonder if I’ve brought this on myself.
three kids, all teens/tweens, they stay with him a few nights every few weeks and generally he spends a lot of his time visiting my parents. My mum particularly can be a bit overbearing and so my older kids have said they’d like to spend less time there. However she’s also very lonely so wants to see them as much as possible, so I’m trying to balance their needs without saying anything that will hurt her feelings. My ex lives round the corner from my parents and goes round regularly for brews, they even invite him round for tea when he’s got the kids, and all think this is perfectly normal.
hes about to go away for a while with work. the weekend before he goes away I specifically asked him to have the kids so I could be at my partner’s for Easter, and told him that I didn’t want them to go to my parents, for the above reasons (generally we get on and this was a perfectly civil conversation where actually he bitched about my parents and said they were driving him mad). Just found out from her that not only are they having my kids because he’s going to work, but they’ve invited him for an Easter meal with them all, because I’m too busy and I didn’t include them in my plans.
had an awful row with my mum about it and feel horrible, she said I’m unreasonable and need to take a look at myself because I’m ‘not even here’. I think I’m trying to create boundaries and they’re ignored by everyone around me. Is she right that this is a normal way to treat your ex son in law? She said he’s her friend, and I feel so betrayed because he treats me badly, she is my support, and then she enables him by welcoming him no matter what he’s done.
was going to put this in relationships but I’ll be bold and ask … aibu?