Do you find it hard to let go of the former parts/phases of your child?

[Godwhatswrongwithme]

Hard to explain what I mean…Dd will be 5 in summer, she’s fantastic and means more to me than anything else in the world. But I sometimes miss the smaller version of her, she’s very intense and strong willed at this age but was calm, gentle and easier as a 1-3.5 year old. I just miss the baby her, then the toddler her etc
I live in the moment and love where we’re at and who she is, but it’s like I miss the old versions of her?
Does anyone else get this?

I'm quite short. I remember when my DS first realised he was taller that me - patting me on the head saying ' you're really small mum, I used to think you were big'!

oh god wait until she becomes a teenager and becomes a completely different person it's so hard and it happens so quickly once puberty kicks in. I really feel I've lost my teen dd and it breaks my heart to see pictures and videos of the younger version of her I'd love her to be little again and not a moody, miserable teenager full of attitude who never wants to do anything with us anymore and is no longer enjoyable to have around. Infact i sometimes dont even like her! and I adored her when she was little. enjoy your dd whilst she's little as they grow up way too quickly.

Yes I totally get this. It’s almost like each phase is a different person - even though obviously it’s the same child, you miss the child they were then as if they’d gone somewhere rather than just grown/ changed … so hard to explain but it really feels like you’ve ‘lost’ someone in some ways.

mine are 4 and 5 so still small but I have a really acute reaction watching certain videos of them at about 2 years old - it brings a lump to my throat and an intense nostalgia mixed with pride and love. I actually try to avoid watching them sometimes - even though they are such lovey memories it feels really poignant somehow to remember how different they were. I feel so ridiculous feeling this way, quite a relief that other people know what I’m talking about!

This also reminds me, eldest dd had a teddy which she adored as a young child. She would take it every where, cuddle it at night and get upset if it was ever lost. She was very protective of this little mouse teddy.

When ds was born dd would let him look at the teddy but never hold it. It was really special to her. As ds got older he would sneak onto dd bed and try to get the teddy. Dd would know instantly and get it back.

Just the other week ds came downstairs with the teddy. I asked him if dd knew he had it. He said yes. I went upstairs to check on dd and ask her if she knew. She was on a phone call to her friends and just said ' yea he can have it, shut the door when you go' 🥺.

Ds is very happy to be the new owner of the teddy but it is sad to see how dd doesn't care about it anymore.

Id love to spend a day with my boys at different stages of their lives! Like as a newborn, at one etc!

Especially the youngest, feel like he's missed out on being a toddler thanks to covid...he was 2 then suddenly 4!

Google for ABBA “Slipping through my fingers” (and have tissues to hand).

I know what you mean. I try not to look back too much though because I think that risks us missing out on the ‘now.’

What has struck me more is the elements of personality that stay exactly the same. I can see aspects of my children's characters (late teens) that I also saw in them when they were babies and toddlers. It's wonderful really.

I do wish I had more videos. Didn't have a smart phone until they were quite old and there was slightly less of a culture of filming everything when they were little. Now the few videos we do have of them as under 5s are treated like holy relics 😂

My DC are 22 and 19. I miss their babyhood, toddlerhood and childhood more than I would have imagined. I love them just as much now but I do miss their innocent childishness. The way they would look at me with their open, happy smiles and their sweet little ways. Yes they could be real pitas at times but I knew how to soothe them and calm them.🥹

All my friends with teenage girls seem to be in some kind of hell at the moment and I remember them being very different when they were smaller , completely different…..It doesn’t seem to have changed that much with my 3 sons 😂 yet..but they are also older but still plenty of time.
I get you up and it’s normal that children change and grow up although your dc is still so so young so very much a small child but yes continuous changes good and and bad ahead.

I found the baby stage hell and almost every stage after that generally just got easer. I tihnk when you're in a difficult stage, that's probably when you miss the other stages more. Now there's no chance of a cuddle from teen ds I miss the cuddly stages and wish I'd appreciated them more at the time rather than wishing for a bit of personal space!

I feel just the same about my DGC. The youngest is one now, and there won't be any more - I'm really missing the baby stage!