Partner

[Ash9420]

Hi everyone
I’m 12+2 today just wanted to get peoples opinions really…
Im I being unreasonable in telling my partner that his out of order for only thinking about himself when he goes to the shop buys himself alcohol and other things he knows I can’t have comes home flaunts them in front of me without even so much as thinking about an alternative for me? His response is ‘I’m being selfish and life sucks’

It's not you taking his baby away it's him failing to be a parent that will decide that. And this includes pregnancy. He either steps up big time now or he will see his baby once a week and it will be his own fault. Get very tough with him. With your job you are going to need a lot of support eg. Night shifts etc and he doesn't sound like he will be any use.

That’s not healthy. You'd benefit from counselling or you will keep ending up with deadbeat men you try to help become functioning adults.

go back to nhs accommodation and sort out childcare. This man will drag you down.

Get away from him. Hes just trying to hang around because he has nowhere else to go and abandonment issues.

Hes a mess. Total chaos, which is exactly what your life will be like if you stay with him.

He already doesn't give a shit about you being sick and pregnant, do you think hes going to then suddenly give a shit about you PLUS another person?? No. He wont.

You can financially support yourself, do it.

I just presumed I was always more mature for my age and had my shit together before others and couldn’t expect everyone to be moving at the same pace as me

Following* *on from this comment I cannot understand why you have chosen to have children with this man who clearly doesn’t have his shit together- you didn’t even live together before you got pregnant. Saying stuff like ‘life is shut’ and ‘you’re pregnant not disabled’ are MASSIVE red flags! These aren’t things he can work on, I would absolutely not want to raise a child with this person.

Thankyou so much for all of your honest opinions. I think a lot of theses things deep down I already knew and felt just needed to hear some home truths.

He sounds absolutely awful.

Can you get your accommodation back?

He sounds like an idiot tbh.

being the lead tenant on our current place and having signed a 12 months tenancy I think my best bet might be to speak with the letting agency and landlord? And taking over the whole tenancy?
he’d have to move out then

It’s hard enough bringing up a child without having to bring up an abusive lazy partner as well OP.
From what you say he is unsupportive and making you very unhappy. The last things you need when you have an incredibly stressful job and are pregnant.
Dont be dragged into his drama .He needs to leave and sort himself out .
Speak to your family and get a circle of support around you that’s reliable.

Zombie