Aphantasia

[Newrumpus]

Recently, I discovered that I am aphantasic. I had never heard of this until recently and after hearing about it I have become interested in the experiences of others.

To save anyone googling, aphantasia is mind blindness or lack of visual imagery. When someone says ‘Imagine an elephant’ I think of an elephant but I don’t see one in my mind.

Does anyone else have experience of this and how did you discover it?

My drawing would be done from my internal monologue describing the elephant. So you'd get something big, grey, with a long trunk etc.

The end result would be appallingly bad but would have the main characteristics of the elephant.

So it would be like me describing an elephant to someone who had never seen one (or a photo of one) before. Then asking them to draw the elephant using using my words to go on. So their drawing would be pretty rubbish- like mine....

I've had a thought. I am unusually good at the game show catchphrase. As in 'say what you see'.....

My husband cannot understand how I can get the correct answer almost instantly.

I've never been able to explain why but thinking about it I wonder if it is related to the fact that I 'see in words' so it's easier to 'say what you see' for me that someone who sees in images?

I see 3D images in my head and I can look all around them. I'm a structural engineer by training, and I can overlay drawings onto a building in my head - so if I'm looking at a roof, for example, I don't only see the tiles - I can "see" joists, purlins, insulation etc overlain in my head. It was only about 2 years ago that I realised this isn't something everyone does.

So your elephant for me is solid image and I can turn it round and round mentally to see different bits and zoom in and out.

Yes, I have vivid visual dreams.

I have thoughts in my head. They are not visual though.

There is some suggestion that people with aphantasia are less likely to experience PTSD than those who visualise more vividly. This makes sense to me, I do tend to move on from things faster than family who visualise everything.

I have some sketchy images but they feel the equivalent of the feeling when something is on the tip of your tongue.

I think too there is a difference between being able to recall images of a house and recognise say a house. Just as if I asked you to recall what the word for something was in whichever MFL you studied you might struggle to recall it, but if I said the word you would know what it meant. I would recognise the house even if I can't imagine it.

There’s no blankness for me, I have quite a rich imagination and a good memory of events. I just don’t think in pictures.
With memories of events I can remember what was said, how I felt, I can describe it. I don’t need a mental image to do that.

A voice or a laugh isn’t a visual thing so I don’t think anyone would ‘see’ those.

I think in words a lot, like an internal monologue. And I can remember the detail of my life, just not in pictures.

I understand that some people have difficulty with autobiographical memory and have little memory of their life. I have a relative like this. That’s not me, it’s different from aphantasia.

My mind is very busy. I just don’t think in pictures. I guess what’s in my head is like an internal narrator.

I could draw an elephant but it would be based on my knowledge of elephant. I wouldn’t be drawing what I see in my mind. I could describe an elephant.

I could describe a person I know, tell you they have long brown hair and twinkly eyes, and clear skin, that they’re tall and move gracefully like a dancer. I know those things without seeing pictures in my head.

I’m like this too

I do dream. My dreams are real life stuff though. Dc and their dad seem to dream these fantasy style dreams with monsters and made up characters. I only dream from real life

I have this too.
Hasn't stopped me doing art though, which is interesting. Quite often I produce an image and am pleasantly surprised when it looks like the real thing. It's as though some other part of me has produced it, if that makes sense?
I have to hide my amazement, because it looks like I'm being boastful, but in reality I'm thinking, 'ooo, that looks just like the horse, doesn't it?' 🤣

I have this, I'm autistic and also have synesthesia. I think in words rather than pictures and I can't recall people's faces when I can't see them. I also have difficulty visualising measurements and distances, if someone says something is 10cm, I have no idea what that looks like. I keep a tape measure handy because I have history of ordering things online that are completely the wrong size

The first paragraph sounds like aphantasia, the second more like another condition - prosopagnosia.

I am sure I have a degree of prosopagnosia, I often mix people up at work.

Regarding the difficulty describing your child, as long as you have an up to date photo on your phone, that is better than a description!

I have always been amazed watching people in crime dramas describing a criminal to an artist to create an artist's impression. I would be so very very bad at that, I just hope I never witness a crime.

I have this too, not total blackness but only the vaguest hint of a colour or shape that disappears as soon as I try to focus on it. I have always been a very fast reader and now suspect this is because my brain doesn't waste time picturing people or places as I read.

My memories are feelings and sounds/ sensations and layouts of places but not pictures.

I also struggle with recognising faces, I remember facts about someone, like they have dark curly hair but if they change that 'marker' or I see them out of context there's a good chance I won't recognise them. I was once at a fancy dress party and was unable to recognise several good friends until I heard their voices!

Like several PP, I can't follow a film if characters look too similar or change appearance. I sat through hours of the Hobbit completely confused before I realised there was more than one man with shaggy brown hair. I've even not recognised myself in photos.

I first heard about aphantasia on MN a few years ago. Then, DD2 was suffering from bad anxiety and I was trying visualisation techniques etc and realised that she had it when she was looking at me so confused when I said things like 'picture a beach in your head' . She has since been diagnosed with autism.

When it comes to memories, we find a lot of the time that she will talk about emotions e.g. if you asked her what she remembers about Disneyland she might say that she remembered feeling sick in the busy restaurant.

She rarely remembers her dreams too. It's fascinating.

None of my dc have this but my dd was telling her friend about my aphantasia and her friend said 'oh my god you can see pictures in your head?' She had it too and didnt know. I think it's more common than people realise, I only realised I had it when I was about 50.

I find it very hard to picture original indoor rooms in my mind. I always find myself imagining a room I know from real life even if it's from many years ago or I didn't spend much time in it.

HighInfedeity- Do constant images not mess with what you’re actually seeing in any way? I can’t imagine it.

Not at all. I see what I'm currently looking at/doing and also have images in my head of what I'm thinking about whilst typing this reply at the same time. That's normal for me.

I cannot imagine not being able to see pictures in my head/mind's eye.

It's fascinating, isn't it, how varied we all are. I never thought that people can't see images. To me, that's mind blowing

It totally freaked me for a while as I was trying to imagine what it would be like to see in your mind. Half of my family is like me and the other half seems to be hyperphantasic so we had a very lengthy conversation when we discovered this.

The said thing for me is that this has put me off reading fiction as I feel like I am missing out somehow compared to my DH’s reading experience. Hopefully this is temporary.

Can you imagine smelling things? Or feeling sensations?

I get this.
Can I ask PPs ,if someone says 'imagine an elephant' do you close your eyes and see a picture? Like a screen ?
I see black / nothing.

I have this. I'm really crap at drawing things spontaneously - do others find this too? If someone says draw a frog, I don't see a frog in my head. I know a frog has a body, legs, etc and I try to draw them. But I'm not drawing from an image in my mind.

I'm quite a creative person in terms of problem solving, working out a new sewing pattern, seeing how to piece bits of furniture together. But I cannot draw or sculpt and its frustrating!

I can imagine the smell or touch but not in a sensory way. When I think of the smell of wood smoke I can’t conjure a sensory sensation. I just know what the smell os
like and when I next smell it will remember it as wood smoke.
Do others have sensory imaginations other than visual?

I don't literally see it before me with my eyes (open or closed) but I can see an elephant within my thoughts and what it looks like.