Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

Am I crazy?

23 replies

sashsashz · 30/03/2023 17:53

I seen he was being weird and off with me so I questioned if and he said it's because I'm always talking to him (I message a few times a day and on days I don't see him I like a 5 min phone call at night). I say I love you too much apparently.

But he's being so off the only other time he's done this was when a new person followed him on Instagram (very immature i know) so I looked and ofc someone followed. He then cancelled our plans for that night

He said we are still together he's pissed pff at me for daily questions about why he's being weird. Then said he'd come over on Friday instead then changed it to we will see. And has ignored me since last night.

Am I being crazy?

By him saying I talk to him too much, I will message him back and maybe send a funny post or say how's your day etc. it's not every minute of the day it's probably not a lot at all. Then the questions I ask him are things like is this happening agisn is that why you're being weird? I say love you to him daily some days I don't.

OP posts:

NameChange60000 · 30/03/2023 17:58

To be honest the fact that you're checking his Instagram, and knowing when he has a new follower is nothing short of BATSHIT

Original poster

sashsashz · 30/03/2023 18:00

@NameChange60000 I only checked because of his previous actions. I'd never thought about it before or ever would until I found about him trying with someone else which I found out started by instagram following when he admitted to it then said he thinks it's girls trying with him by following him

OP posts:

NameChange60000 · 30/03/2023 18:01

It sounds like a relationship between 13 year olds.

Sapphire387 · 30/03/2023 18:03

Why are you bothering? This sounds exhausting.

patrickbatemansbusinesscard · 30/03/2023 18:03

How old are you?

PlantagenetEmbassy · 30/03/2023 18:04

You sound suffocating TBH I'd be running from the hills. I don't even know when my OWN accounts get new followers and I work in digital marketing!

PlantagenetEmbassy · 30/03/2023 18:05

*running FOR the hills. Unless you were there, in which case from might be more appropriate.

Brendabigbaps · 30/03/2023 18:05

Your being too intense.
hes keeping you around until someone else comes along

GalileoHumpkins · 30/03/2023 18:06

Is it really worth all this angst?

pncr · 30/03/2023 18:13

I couldn't deal with someone as intense as you.

I've no idea who my partner is followed by or follows on Instagram and I care even less

Original poster

sashsashz · 30/03/2023 18:16

@pncr and I didn't either until I found things out now it's like whenever he behaves that way I know he does and I looked.

He also started looking at mines which was him telling on himself

OP posts:

NameChange60000 · 30/03/2023 18:17

Are you 13?

pncr · 30/03/2023 18:25

sashsashz · 30/03/2023 18:16

@pncr and I didn't either until I found things out now it's like whenever he behaves that way I know he does and I looked.

He also started looking at mines which was him telling on himself

I have no idea what this means.

If it's bothering you that much you need to end it with him. This sort of angst isn't good for anyone.

zusje · 30/03/2023 23:45

In my experience if you have to question the relationship that much it's not a good relationship. In my previous relationships I would be made feel like I'm being needy, would have to beg for affection/attention, we lived in the same town and he drove (had a car) and I would message him crying (I had recently lost my dog and work issues) and he wouldn't budge on the "1 night a week" arrangement we had (unless of course GOT was on and he could use my amazon prime to watch, than he didn't mind coming over an extra night a week). I met my current partner and had a fight with someone at work about something silly. My partner doesn't drive and lived in a different town (aprox 1 hour by train). It was Sunday evening, I was working until 7pm and my partner was working at 10 on Monday morning. I called him crying because I was upset (this was a silly fight, a non event really). He took two trains and a taxi and showed up at my place of work at 7 with flowers and snacks and spent the night with me and got up at 7 in the morning to catch the train back and go to work the next morning. I never have questioned his love/affection for me. A person who cares will make you feel secure, loved and content and this whole "she's a crazy chick" narrative needs to change. Most women aren't "crazy", "controlling" or "intense" they are just with a partner who won't commit and puts in the absolute minimum in the relationship because we are told in a patriarchal society that that's what we deserve. Do yourself a favour and find someone better!

America12 · 30/03/2023 23:52

You sound about 12.

ladydimitrescu · 31/03/2023 00:18

Yes, you're being way OTT. I'd run a mile if I was on the receiving end of this.

CrossBun · 31/03/2023 00:22

I wouldn’t say you’re crazy but it sounds like you don’t trust him and he might not be able to give you what you need.

NotNowGertrude · 31/03/2023 07:33

Sounds like he's just not that into you

QueenBee1234 · 31/03/2023 07:47

Crazy or about 13. Just get rid of him.

Aprilx · 31/03/2023 07:53

sashsashz · 30/03/2023 18:16

@pncr and I didn't either until I found things out now it's like whenever he behaves that way I know he does and I looked.

He also started looking at mines which was him telling on himself

I cannot make head nor tail of that and I couldn’t follow what you were saying in your first post about Instagram either. If you are not a very young teenager, then you need to stop this, you sound suffocating and he will be running for the hills if he has any sense.

OnaBegonia · 31/03/2023 08:58

until I found about him trying with someone else
This is reason enough to get rid, save your energy instead of looking for proof he's an arsehole.

Coffeeandchocs · 31/03/2023 09:18

I think what you’ve said is that you’ve caught him talking to another woman on instagram before. So now, when you feel something is wrong, you check his instagram for any new followers to see if he might be talking to someone else.
The relationship doesn’t sound like a good one

IDontWantToBeAPie · 31/03/2023 09:20

Sorry OP, you're his back pocket woman. He keeps you coasting until a new option pops up. Then if it doesn't work out he takes you out of his pocket again for a while until the next woman he's interested in pops up.

Flip