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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how many different extra curricular activities your DC do?

72 replies

Namechange20222022 · 29/03/2023 18:35

DC is in yr 2, so not at an age where he has a regular hobby that he does several times a week. We started by enrolling him in a few things that were available at times that suited, eg straight from school to avoid wraparound, Saturday morning etc. he now does quite a lot to the point I think it’s excessive (something every day and some days 2 activities/lessons - E.g we pick him up from after school drama club to take him straight to a swimming lesson). The problem is he doesn’t want to give anything up, wants to do everything etc. when / how do we decide to rein it in to fewer activities? How much is too much for a 7YO?

OP posts:
2022again · 29/03/2023 19:49

we do a big fat 0...! is there any reason why you feel he needs to do quite so much? sports, swimming, music, acting are all fab in themselves but theres a point at which it feels like force-feeding....having down-time and the chance to be "bored" is also a route to creativity . Is he an only child??

UsernameMcUsername · 29/03/2023 19:55

If he's happy & not showing signs of tiredness I'd just go with it. I have a Yr3 DC who absolutely thrives on being busy (probably does the same amount of stuff as yours). In contrast I also have a slightly older DC who did relatively little at that age and still needs more down time. There's no one size fits all.

Snugglemonkey · 29/03/2023 19:59

My DC does swimming, horse riding, football, rugby, gymnastics and karate. He wants to do skating lessons so he can join an ice hockey team and take up fencing, but I think we need an overhaul of the schedule because that would be too much. Especially as we have another wee one who will need classes factored in.

Oysterbabe · 29/03/2023 20:03

I've got one in y2. She does
Monday - Karate
Tuesday - swimming
Wednesday- nothing
Thursday - choir and basketball
Friday - nothing
Saturday - gymnastics and football
Sunday - nothing

Sounds like a lot but I don't think it is. They're all about 45 minutes long and PE at her school is crap, they do barely anything. She enjoys them all and doesn't seem overstretched.

FMW · 29/03/2023 20:04

Y2 DC - swimming on Saturdays, drama on Wednesdays through ASC and forest school on Fridays.

R DC - forest school on Fridays.

The school doesn’t offer much and what it does offer is oversubscribed. Lack of offer - and sport in particular - is why we are moving them to a different school for Y3 and Y1 onwards.

bluesky45 · 29/03/2023 20:06

5 years old - 1hr of sport (rugby) and half an hour of swimming lessons each week. We could maybe do more but it can be tricky fitting after school clubs in after work and before bedtime!

GreenLeavesRustling · 29/03/2023 20:06

8 YO
School football
Ju Jitsu
Art club
Football (2 hrs training on Sat, Match on Sun)

Teen
school football
Debating
Science Club
Trombone lessons
Football (as above, training 2 hrs Saturday, match on Sunday)

Feels about right

Heckythump1 · 29/03/2023 20:10

7 year old DD does:
Swimming
Gymnastics
Junior Brass Band
St John Badgers
All 1 evening a week.
She also has to practice her instrument daily.

She absolutely loves them all currently, so I don't feel like it's too much even if I feel like I spend my life taking all the place!

cadburyegg · 29/03/2023 20:11

DS8 does swimming lessons for half an hour on Saturdays and an hour of beavers on Wednesday. He's also started piano lessons with my mum (she's a teacher) which are about 20 mins. He wants to give up beavers so when it's finished (he only has 1 more badge to get) I've said he doesn't have to move onto cubs (which is a shame... I would really like him to).

DS5 just does swimming lessons also for half an hour on Saturdays.

I wish I could get them involved in more but they're just not interested 🤷‍♀️ DS8 has done a couple of clubs after school but always gives them up after a term or so.

Namechangedagain20 · 29/03/2023 20:17

DD is 5 and in Y1. She does 2 after school clubs a week (singing and multi sports) and will probably pick up another next year when she’s old enough for football club. Currently due to do a taster class for a theatre club on Saturdays which her 3 year old sister can also attend, so I’m hoping they like it.

Briallen · 29/03/2023 20:19

My 7yo in year 2 does:
netball
swimming
drama
skating

and next year will start an instrument in school time.

Dinosauratemydaffodils · 29/03/2023 20:21

8 year old does kickboxing, street dance, drama, swimming and plays for a local football so training and games at the weekend.

4 year old does Ballet, Rainbows, Drama and Squirrels.

Both are doing Forest School at the weekend as well. They're joiners wirh boundless energy. Dc1 has a list of stuff he wants to do including Sea Cadets when old enough and dc2 wants to add more dance.

FabFitFifties · 29/03/2023 20:21

12 yearold - none. It's very annoying, he's missing out. He's very good at sport too but won't join teams etc. He did Beavers and Cubs until lockdown, but wouldn't go back.

DaisyWaldron · 29/03/2023 20:25

At that age DD did ballet, tap, gymnastics and violin.

DS did piano and parkour.

Now they teenagers, DD does drama and orchestra (she also has a paper round and gave up a sport because she had too much going on in her GCSE year) and DS does drama, volleyball and a regular D&D game.

Hesma · 29/03/2023 20:27

DD 10 cubs, swimming, football
DD 13 netball x3, swimming

ZebraKid71 · 29/03/2023 20:32

It depends on your child and the kind of life you want for them.

I do see the value in extracurriculars but also see just as much value in playing with no structure. Down time is important to us so we try to ring fence our free time and limit activities to an extent. I really wouldn't want more than one activity after school, I just think it's too much.

Swimming is non negotiable, then my eldest two do a sport each for an hour a week, plus junior parkrun at the weekend if they feel like it. Their after school clubs change every term so sometimes they do an extra thing if there is something they fancy.

SweetSakura · 29/03/2023 20:35

DD is 9.and would be constantly on the go if my bank balance and energy allowed it!
She does 6 types of dance plus theatre school. She used to do swimming and horse riding as well but we've just paused those for now. (She's a competent swimmer)

Ds 12 is the opposite and a bit of a bookworm/home body. He does football twice a week plus a board games club, but often has a friend round to play games too

whenshallwethreemeet · 29/03/2023 20:39

I think KS2 is the time when a lot of kids do a number of activities, largely because classes are often only 30mins to an hour and are often relatively cheap and, if on the school site, can be tagged onto the school day so they are logistically easier.
Pre-Covid, when DD was in Yrs 3 & 4, her school offered after school clubs every day and she did one every day. She was still finished by 4pm and so did two non-school activities later on. She probably got 30 mins homework a week and 10 mins reading so plenty of time for other stuff. She's now Yr8 and still does after school clubs three times a week more for the social side of things than anything else and then does her sport 3 evenings a week for 90 mins plus matches at weekends.
DS is now in Yr6 and does an after school activity every day plus two sports clubs once a week and again at the weekends. One evening is a bit tight as he gets home at 5.15 and is out the door again at 5.45 but we're used to it so just make sure everything is sorted the night before and that there's a tin of beans in the cupboard!

Mumof1andacat · 29/03/2023 20:45

My ds now 10 has only ever done swimming on the day I pick him up from school. Other days he has to be in after school wraparound care. They do offer sports after school but they finished too early and we couldn't get there to pick up. Things like cubs and beavers started just as we would be getting home. Such is life. Hopefully he can pick up some bits when he goes to senior school

ellesbellesxxx · 29/03/2023 20:47

Year one twins:

DD: swimming, tap and ballet (45 mins in total) and piano

DS: swimming, rugby or cricket depending on the season, will start clarinet when his hands are a bit bigger 😁

They have both gone to some of the after school clubs on offer but prefer the quieter ones like art/Lego so we will only sign them up for those moving forwards. They get tired easily so try to make sure they have time at home just to play and relax

anon90210 · 29/03/2023 21:33

11 year old 4 classes pw
4 year old 2 classes per week but will be starting swimming in September so will be 3 a week

TheWorstWeek · 29/03/2023 21:42

I think too much for a 7yo is whatever is negatively impacting your child or family life.

6yo only does karate once a week and in a year or two I'd like him to consider learning an instrument so would get him lessons for that.

4yo doesn't do anything yet, mostly because he's knackered after nursery and also pretty shy so has no desire to do any clubs even though his brother does. Maybe once he's at school next year he'll want to.

Obviously happy to consider any clubs/classes that we can afford and are feasible, time and location wise in the future.

Girasoli · 29/03/2023 21:46

6 (nearly 7) Yr old: 1 after school sports club run by the PE teacher, swimming, church choir (plus after school club for childcare two nights a week)

3 year old: Just does 3 full days of nursery a week. Sometimes they do 'extras' like forest school or tennis so we'll sign him up next time a course is running.

WandaWonder · 29/03/2023 21:48

Swimming and scouts, he was allowed to stop one and do another but 2 would have been the most we would have allowed

He does neither now so can take something up if he chose too

Sandysandwich · 29/03/2023 21:56

Mine does
swimming on tuesdays
Cubs on thursdays
Football on saturdays

The other days we just try and wear him and the dog out as both have endless energy and he definitely needs to run about after school.
If we could put him in more activities we would, some kids just have a lot of energy they need to use up