In denial?

[gallina]

I think my little girl has autism, I've contacted a gp and waiting for our appointment.

Her dad thinks there's nothing wrong with her and almost takes it personally if I mention my worries. He sees it as a negative rather than I'm looking to get her some help, if she needs it.

Have previously raised some concerns with HV and was told to wait and see.

My beautiful girl will be two in 2 weeks. But there have been some traits I've picked up on which seem to increasing and becoming more noticeable.

She doesn't respond to her name
When she looks at me it's as though she's looking through me, I feel like I can't 'get through to her'
No speech as such, will say mam dad hello bye, she could previously say thank you but has stopped.
Eating is terrible, she will spit food out she'd previously enjoyed or have a couple of mouthfuls and won't have anything else
Very difficult to get to sleep, she has bags under her eyes but will fight sleep (I have to lie in complete darkness and silence with her for atleast an hour of her singing wriggling until she wears herself out and falls asleep) she will wake multiple times a night
Covers her ears and hums, sometimes hide when there is loud noise (baby sister crying)
At a baby playgroup she wouldn't engage in the stories, singing, bubble machine but wanted to be sat playing with blocks alone, would not respond to me
She will stim occasionally which consists of rapidly opening and closing her hands into fists
Walks around on her tip toes
Does not like to be touched but is very very tactile with me, very cuddly with me but does not like anyone else to touch me, she would push them away and scream
Doesn't play with toys as such, will stack blocks and get very angry if they fall or are moved, will line her books up,
Attempts to eat objects such as soap, shower gel,moisturiser
Pulls at my hair and tries to eat it
There is probably more but that's all I can think of at the moment, sorry it's long. My little girl is just in her own little world and I want to do the best for her, so my Aibu is

Yabu - he is right
Yanbu - you're doing the right thing

Thank you 😊

Many of these fit two of my autistic children , I hope you get your answers. The wait for diagnosis is many years long unless you pay privately just so you know

@Divorcedalongtime thanks so much for replying. I feel like I just know it in my gut if that makes sense and then made to almost feel guilty to bring it up to him. May have to look into private. I don't know where to start

YANBU early intervention really is the very best thing for a child if they do have ASD, if she doesn't then there is no harm done having an assessment.

He needs to get over himself.

i think your gut is right. I have two autistic sons and an autistic husband. Maybe your husband worry about her future. Dont need to worry. Lots of autistic people are thriving and very successful in their life. I’m a living witness of it.

the most important is to get support as soon as you can

You are following your instincts for the well-being of your child. There is nothing wrong with that OP

I think a lot of dads are in denial at first. They usually come round. My son's dad was like this, then went on to become an amazing parent and very proud of our son's achievements.

Have a look and see if there are any local autism or special needs Facebook groups where you can ask questions and get some support. It may be autism, it may not - but you're being a good parent by wanting to look into it further.

Yanbu

My son had most of these traits as a 2 year old and was referred at 30 months assessment. Only got diagnosed when he was 6 due to waiting list for paediatrician.

Waiting probably won’t do much harm but I’d start to try to get advice on how to communicate, we attended workshops based on something called “Hanen” which were very helpful.

Should also have said I had the very same instincts as you, and some of my wider family are STILL in denial, even though he is 8, and his school are having to make a lot of adjustments for him to remain in mainstream.

Thank you for the replies. I feel abit emotional is if I have validation in some way. I just want the best for my daughter so nice to see I'm not over reacting about this